Sorry I haven’t had one of these up in a while. The show has been great as usual, but this week was a little more special than most, as hopefully you’ll see . . .
Badd Dogg v. Shelton Benjamin in a Dog Collar Match:
These guys were tag team champs when Shelton was called up to Raw. Badd Dogg (Then Redd Dogg) was pissed that Shelton would leave him behind (even though Shelton offered to wrestle in the WWE part of the week and defend the titles with Redd Dogg the rest of the week) and he left Shelton for dead during a match. Thus, this match is born. Shelton attacks before the bell to ensure that Badd Dogg is also placed in the dog collar, and most of the match is both men choking each other with the dog collar. After much choking, punching and crotching with the collar, Badd Dogg ends up outside the ring and while the referee keeps Shelton from following him out, Badd Dogg gets out of his end of the collar, ties Shelton’s foot to the rope, and hotshots him down for the three count. Badd Dogg continues to punish Shelton afterward, but Shelton recovers and DESTROYS the Dogg and tries to lynch him, much like he was a few months ago.
Winner: Badd Dogg via pinfall at 6:45
The Discyples of Synn (Se7en & Travis Bane) v. BJ Payne & “The Demon of the Deep and the Guardian of the Gates of Hell” and former OVW Champion, Leviathan (Dave Bautista)
Synn is her usual cat ‘o nine tails waivin,’ mini-skirt wearin,’ grossin’ out self. BJ Payne used to be one half of the Discyples until he was injured. While he was gone, Synn replaced him with Travis Bane, so to gain revenge, BJ Payne attacked them with his old partner Damien in a battle of new v. old Discyples. That didn’t work, so he went to Synn’s former protégé Leviathan, who’s contract had been sold to D-Von. Lots of back-and-forth action highlighting that Leviathan (Bautista) is still a monster and nobody wants to mess with him. When he does get in, he full nelson slams Bane, and demon-bombs Se7en. Bane recovers and breaks up the pinfall attempt with a kick. All four men end up in the ring and in the confusion, Synn tries to mace Leviathan, but hits Bane instead allowing Leviathan to spear Se7en for Payne’s frog splash and a pin.
Winners: BJ Payne and Leviathan (Bautista) via pinfall at 6:15
As Payne cuts a promo on the Discyples in the locker room, the Discyples attack and Synn teaches Payne the error of his ways by lighting his midsection on fire with a Lawler-like fireball.
We then see highlights of the “Run for the Rumble” that has taken place over the last few weeks. This was a tournament between the Lords of the Ring (“Mr. Wrestling” Nick Dinsmore & “Ironman” Rob Conway) and the Revolution (“Machine” Doug Basham and the Damaja). In the first round, Dinsmore beat his partner, while the Damaja beat his. They then faced each other, with the Damaja coming out on top despite a heroic effort from Dinsmore with a knee blown out mid-match. Damaja then beat OVW champion Nova for the OVW Title, a match with Kurt Angle and a slot in the Royal Rumble in January. I must say that I’m surprised by all of this since I would consider Damaja to be the least talented and charismatic of all the other guys in the tournament and the only one (besides Nova) to not have appeared on Raw or SmackDown! recently.
The Damaja (w/the Revolution) v. Kurt Angle
The Revolution comes down to ringside to back up the Damaja on his big night. Kurt Angle isn’t impressed, even now that they’ve added Kanyon to the stable. Nevertheless, he needs his own backup, so he calls out his brother Eric (who was attacked by the Revolution last week) and he scatters them with the aid of a baseball bat. Now that the seconds have been taken care of the match starts.
Lockup to start and Kurt backs Damaja into the corner. A wrestling sequence leads to Damaja getting Angle in a side headlock. Angle powers out, sends Damaja into the ropes, leapfrogs him and then hiptosses him down to the mat where he works in a hammerlock. Damaja powers up and backs Angle into the corner where a few kicks knock him to the floor. Angle has had enough of this crap, so he gets up and slings the Damaja into the corner and beats him down, then stomps a mudhole in him for good measure. The crowd is a little split since Damaja is a local guy and Angle is usually a heel. Cornette mentions that the crowd began lining up at 10 a.m. this morning to see one of the premier talents in this industry. Powerslam and Angle hooks his leg for a two count. Angle works Damaja over in consecutive corners with some knife-edge chops. Damaja finally gets in a few of his own. Angle slams Damaja and gets another two count. Blind charge leads to Angle going shoulder first into the ringpost. As the Damaja stomps his own mudhole, we take another commercial break.
As we return, Damaja hangs Angle in the tree of woe. Damaja heads outside and stretches Angle’s arm out working on the injured shoulder. More stomping and then a modified Fujiwar (sp?) armbar. Angle tries to power up, but he finds himself once again in the armbar. Damaja gets up and puts some kicks to Angle’s side for good measure, while still working the arm. Angle is able to push Damaja into the ropes, but he gets clotheslined and covered for two. More wrenching of the arm. Angle punches Damaja to break the hold, goes to the ropes, but receives a stiff punch to the shoulder to knock him back to the mat and let the Damaja regain control via the armbar. Damaja tries another cover, but Angle kicks out. Angle in the sitout position as Damaja twists the arm behind his back. Angle starts up and drops down, almost Stunning/Diamond Cutting Damaja. Both men slow to recover and they trade punches. Both men into the ropes and Angle gets a belly to belly suplex, but Damaja kicks out at two. Rolling germans follow, but the Revolution has made its way back to ringside and they attack Eric Angle. While all of this is going on, Kurt blocks the brain damage and gets an ankle lock in the center of the ring. Jackie Gayda gets up on the apron to distract Senior OVW official Robert Briscoe with her Blind Date attitude. Damaja gets out of the Angle Slam and pushes Kurt into Doug Basham who was on the opposite side of the apron from Gayda and Briscoe. Angle falls back into the Brain Damage (Sky High), but Angle kicks out at two!! Kurt slowly recovers as Damaja readies himself for a missile dropkick. As the Damaja is about to win the biggest match of his career since last week, Kurt runs the ropes and Angle Slams him from the top rope for the three count!!! Damaja really held his own here and showed that he is every bit as capable as the other OVW guys of being up with Raw or SmackDown! and you’ll apparently see him in the Royal Rumble, unless he puts his shot up in a match between now and then (and who would do that ;-) )
Winner: Kurt Angle via pinfall at 12:05
Kurt and Eric (who has shaved his head and looks like a cross between Kurt and George Costanza’s last boss on “Seinfeld”) celebrate in the ring as Cornette gives us the great news about next week . . . Eddy Guerrero v. Nova!! Giddy-Up~!
Excellent satire, different from Excalibur but good to see certain jokes still in there.. Eric Nies? Very very out there and brought a big chuckle. And WHYSPYR? ooh..where have I heard that one before?