This was a column about the recent Republican debates, actually, but this paragraph caught my eye:
'...[Romney] then got red in the face, had a heated exchange and violated the Texas governor's space by grabbing his shoulder. It was exactly like professional wrestling, except for the part about the middle-aged guys in suits.'
First thought: Ha ha, Gail Collins obviously hasn't watched much professional wrestling lately.
Second thought: When DID wrestling turn into middle-aged guys in suits? These days I only look up from my crocheting when I hear the bell ring.
Third: I'd pay to see Perry vs. Romney in a hair match... but fantasy booking belongs in the politics forum.
(I'm thinking of this as a wrestling topic rather than a political one. I could be mistaken.)
I guess the only advice I have is not to break up your paragraphs so much. I know it makes for easier reading on the web, but an average of 5-6 lines a paragragh is still short enough to read easily, and is a ton less choppy.