This week, NXT presents a rematch of the triple threat for the women's title. I think that I'm being pretty reasonable when I say that, if that's your advertised match, we should just get right to it. There's not going to be anything else worth talking about, after all.
Sooo, away we go!
Ahem. It appears that I've been somewhat hasty, as first we're going to do a Drew McIntryre squash match. Really? Really? Okay, fine. I guess we need to pad the show out a bit. Drew nails a big boot early on that pretty much puts an end to anything the jobber had in mind, and after a bit more roughhousing, ends it with the Claymore. Match Rating: Still Out Of Squash Jokes.
Okay, now the triple threat! No? Okay, we've got some spacer packages, okay. Uh, first is one recapping Ember Moon's deal, and reminding us that she's back, and will be facing Peyton Royce next week. I'm sure that match will have a perfectly satisfying conclusion. We also get an Alaister Black vignette.
Okay, now dammit! It's the Authors of Pain against Some Jobbers. Actually, this winds up just being Akem clobbering the jobbers, as Rezar hangs out on the floor with Paul. Akem gets the win with a pretty swank pump-handle Death Valley Driver, and then after the bell, Rezar comes in to hit the Super Collider. Match Rating: Actually, I Do Like That DVD A Lot. Paul's on the mic! Okay, it's "Heavy Machinery are as foolish as they are large," "undefeated," "Book of Pain," "Book of Domination." Good talk, Paul! But now, Heavy Machinery are out. Things look like they might get physical, and the AoP take a powder.
Alright, alright, let's try to get the rest of this out of the way. We recap the Roode/Strong feud, and then we get a package for Sonja Deville that legit makes her look like a killer. Anything else? Can we get to the triple threat now?
Okay, we're back down at the ring and fuck you NXT when are we going to get to the fucking fireworks factory!!!
Ahem, I'm sorry about that. Let me compose myself for a moment. Whew. Anyhoo, what we've actually got next is Raul Mendoza (hey, from the Cruiserweight Classic!) up against the Velveteen Dream. Dream's doing a lot of showboating to start, so Mendoza nails a flying kick to stun him. Dream bounces back with a big boot, followed by a European uppercut. Dream hoists Mendoza up for a pretty nice back suplex and puts the boots to him, but Mendoza escapes what looks like another suplex attempt, nails a bunch of strikes, and does absolutely the coolest dodge between the corner ropes that I've ever seen. Seriously, if you were planning to skip this match (and why would you do that?), pop in just to catch this part. It doesn't help Mendoza all that much, though, as Dream catches him off the ropes with a flapjack, then hits a cartwheel Death Valley Driver. He heads up to the top rope, and finishes Mendoza off with just a terrible, terrible elbow drop. Match Rating: Why Doesn't He Finish With The DVD? DVDs Are Back!
Remember when Itami nearly killed Lorcan last week? Ohno remembers. He actually gets pretty down on himself for getting riled up last week, so riled up that he gently shoved Itami for trying to murder Oney Lorcan. Let's all just dwell on that a moment. Anyhoo, KO decides that the best thing he can do is set a positive example, so next week he'll be fighting Black.
Alright, finally, finally Nikki Cross is in the ring, signalling the start of our main event. She just shows up without fanfare, but Riot and Asuka come out to their music. This one's elimination rules, so the winner must beat both other women. I took, let me see here, absolutely no notes whatsoever on this match. I was going to, but I couldn't look away from the screen. Basically, though, the story of the match was that Cross and Riot could have quite easily taken Asuka out of the match at any time if they'd teamed up, but they just hate each other so much that any team-up immediately fell apart. My favorite bit came when Cross was outside with Asuka, and held her up for Riot to hit a running kick, but instead Riot came off the apron and hit both of them. Eventually, Cross managed to get Riot up on the top rope, and nailed the swinging neckbreaker off the turnbuckle to eliminate Riot. Down to just two competitors, Tom Phillips takes a moment to remind us that triple threat rules mean no countouts and no disqualifications, and not a minute after he says this, Cross and Asuka brawl to the back and the ref calls for a No Contest. Match Rating: What The Actual Fuck Was That, Ref? Even commentary is disgusted with the call. We're not quite done, though, as Cross and Asuka continue to brawl, and the camera crew continues to follow them around Full Sail. They're throwing each other into absolutely everything, then they wind up in the green room, and Nikki Cross tries to drown Asuka in a cooler full of water. When that doesn't work, she just holds her nose and mouth shut to suffocate her. Yikes! They keep fighting! This is like the best kind of old-school ECW brawl when they'd wind up out on the streets of Philly. Finally, the make the circle back around to ringside, over by the commentary desk. They're brawling on the edge of something, and I can't really tell how high up they are, but we all know where they're going. Sure enough, Cross hits a Cross-body that sends both of them over the edge and through a table. Huh, I guess they were only maybe ten feet up, but they're dead nonetheless. Everyone comes out to check on them, and that's the show.
Okay, okay, my impatience and the non-finish of the match aside, that was incredible. Hopefully, this gets us to some kind of falls count anywhere scenario. And while they've made it clear in the past that Ember Moon was their pick to succeed Asuka, I hope they've changed their minds, because Nikki Cross is clearly THE BEST.
Except for the brawl, this was a terrible show. Squashes and a LOT of packages. Velveteen Dream is missing something. I'm not sold on the character yet. Oh and seems they've decided he is a Prince 'clone' with Phillips using 2 or 3 Prince song titles when describing him. The dvd was nice. The elbow wasn't (though iirc last time it did look great)
The stipulation (no dq/count outs) was mentioned twice even and still this happens. Very sloppy. The brawl was intense and yeah Nikki Cross is awesome but still...didn't make up for the bad show.
Next week...Ohno vs Black. That should be fun. Basically Black's first real challenge and since it's technically teacher vs student I'm sure they'll try their best. Don't think it's gonna end well though, Itami will fuck it up.
Originally posted by dMpOh and seems they've decided he is a Prince 'clone' with Phillips using 2 or 3 Prince song titles when describing him.
Which is upsetting, as, again, he is clearly doing a Jimmy Hendrix. Are they concerned that people won't get it? If so, why do they think those same people would enjoy a Prince wrestler?
He's weirdly doing both at the same time - remember when the promo videos were "The Patrick Clark Experience?"
Funny enough I feel he looks more like the guitarist from the Revolution (dez Dickinson?) in 1999. Regardless, it's a boring gimmick to have a guy strut around and then get aggressive when he gets hit. He's doing everything he is supposed to but I've seen it a dozen times now.