Hierarchy of Deities: Sarah Vowell > Roger Ebert > Albert Pujols > God
So, um, I don't want you to believe everything you hear at the parent-teacher conference, okay, 'cause...they lie. And they exaggerate. That's why they're teachers, right? Those who can't, right, Mom? Those who can't.
I would just rather have the umps get it right than say "oops, too bad, too late." They corrected it early enough in the game that the Indians had every chance to win; in fact, they took the lead after that.