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20.4.14 1607
The W - Pro Wrestling - Mark Henry
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Punkinhed
Salami








Since: 23.1.02

Since last post: 4063 days
Last activity: 4038 days
#1 Posted on


After watching Smackdown, I'd like everyone to give at least a small amount of respect to Mizark, because he HAS gotten better. Not by a great amount, he'll never be a Benoit, Angle or Rey, or an Edge or even a Kane, but he has made some recognizable progress. Even if it's the combination of the Heyman booking and the Eddie/Chavo magic, there has been some improvement. Personally I'd like to see him get a mini-feud with Chavo where Mark just "hulks out" and starts smashing Chavo. Kind of an "I've been holding back but now I won't" thing. Make it a submission match, with the idea that Chavo will have to wear down Henry, while Henry, being so much stronger, only has to hit Chavo a few times. You like? Even if you don't, will you agree that Mark has gotten a little better, or at least slightly entertaining?

On a side note, do you think he really DOES have to hold back? I mean, if he's near as strong as they make him out to be with those stunts, it would be pretty easy to hurt someone.



Triple H is a dead ringer for "Buzzer" of the Dreadnoks. Just give him some mirror shades and teach him to say "Blimey, Zartan".
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Spaceman Spiff
Knackwurst








Since: 2.1.02
From: Philly Suburbs

Since last post: 5 days
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#2 Posted on
Gotten better? Nope. Entertaining? Nope. I've seen no recognizable progress in him as a wrestler, and don't want him anywhere *near* Chavo in any kind of feud.

Mark Henry is u.s.e.l.e.s.s.



Matthew: You would've loved it, David. A week in a foreign country, strange people, strange customs...
Dave: Oh, I know what you mean. I've been to Canada.
Fantomas
Polska kielbasa








Since: 23.2.02
From: New York

Since last post: 4207 days
Last activity: 2804 days
#3 Posted on
And what's the deal with his tights? He's got the planet earth woth fricking pink muscle arms flexing out of it..?!?

I didn't notice anything good or bad about henry, but remember if he did mess up anything it may have been edited out.

And wasn't he supposed to lose weight? He looks the same to me.

Kei Posiskunk
Kolbasz








Since: 7.1.02
From: Central PA, USA

Since last post: 293 days
Last activity: 4 days
#4 Posted on
Mizark was sent down to OVW to lose weight, which he did, and supposed improved 1,000 times, especially during a few matches with D'Lo....but then that Ah-nuld's Strongest Man contest came up and Vince realized he could use it to hype Mizark's return, and had him start training again. In order to train, Mizark regained all the bulk he was sent to OVW to use in the first place. (since most "Strongmen" are all bulk, no definition, anyway)
Dahak
Frankfurter








Since: 12.5.02
From: Junction City OR.

Since last post: 1840 days
Last activity: 1493 days
#5 Posted on
Mark Henry is by far my least favorite active wrestler. He is in the bottom 5 in skills, bottom 5 in promos, and in the top 5 in sloppiness. Not a good combo.
Plus Mark Henry could suddenly be more skilled than Mysterio, Angle, and Benoit at the same time. Then get the heat skills of Flair, Austin, and Vince. Then get more charisma than Hogan or Rock. And do you know what you would have? The guy who got a blowjob from a drag queen, got an 80 year old pregnant with a dildo, and slept with his sister. So nothing Mark Henry could ever fix the fuck ups of his past character.



Marge I am just trying to get into heaven not run for Jesus.
EastCoastAvenger
Bockwurst








Since: 4.1.02
From: Clearwater, FL

Since last post: 1807 days
Last activity: 85 days
#6 Posted on
Well, I'll toss in my own opinion here. I dig Mizark, mainly because he's one of the few big guys actually getting some tv time in WWE. YEah, yeah, I like the Benoits, and Angles as much as anyone, but when it comes down to it, a smaller guy will never be as believable to me as an ass kicker as a big guy like Undertaker and Brock at one end of the spectrum and the Rikishis and Mark Henrys stuck in the midcard.

So, yeah, I think he's gotten better. I also think most people (here and elsewhere) unfairly shit on the guy because he's not a 5 foot 10 Canadian with a missing tooth. Get over it.



Two hours later they decided to stop at a diner
Because they loved the smell of eggs and coffee
I just had to smoke a cigarette and wear a hat
By the time that they set off again, the sun was starting to set
It made the sky look red like a nuclear ray
One of them said "what do you want more than anything
in this whole wide world
Do you want money, do you want sex, or do you want all that success?"
I thought about that one myself
(Then they came upon the thing)

From, "The Church of Logic, Sin and Love" by The Men
Spaceman Spiff
Knackwurst








Since: 2.1.02
From: Philly Suburbs

Since last post: 5 days
Last activity: 51 min.
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#7 Posted on
No, I shit on him because he can't sell, can't wrestle, can't talk, has no charisma, is slow & lumbering in the ring, and overall has no discernable worth as a pro wrestler.

Whether that's "unfair" or not, ::shrug::



Matthew: You would've loved it, David. A week in a foreign country, strange people, strange customs...
Dave: Oh, I know what you mean. I've been to Canada.
redsoxnation
Scrapple








Since: 24.7.02

Since last post: 293 days
Last activity: 293 days
#8 Posted on

    Originally posted by EastCoastAvenger
    Well, I'll toss in my own opinion here. I dig Mizark, mainly because he's one of the few big guys actually getting some tv time in WWE. YEah, yeah, I like the Benoits, and Angles as much as anyone, but when it comes down to it, a smaller guy will never be as believable to me as an ass kicker as a big guy like Undertaker and Brock at one end of the spectrum and the Rikishis and Mark Henrys stuck in the midcard.

    So, yeah, I think he's gotten better. I also think most people (here and elsewhere) unfairly shit on the guy because he's not a 5 foot 10 Canadian with a missing tooth. Get over it.




I think its more due to his getting a ten year contract before he ever did anything in the ring, and the fact that his matches make me long for the return of the Giant Gonzales.



I want you to know, I agree with everything I've just said.
shea
Bockwurst








Since: 1.2.02
From: Brooklyn NY

Since last post: 3814 days
Last activity: 3700 days
#9 Posted on
... let's see .... he's a butt-ugly pudding of a man with no redeeming qualities as a wrestler, and he's on my TV screen for unwarranted minutes at a time?

In my house, we've got two words for you: Survivor, CSI.
Redhawk1810
Linguica








Since: 10.1.02
From: Seattle

Since last post: 4190 days
Last activity: 4186 days
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#10 Posted on
I think Mark can get over despite his old characters. Wasn't it The Undertaker who murdered his parents, died and went to Heaven, and wanted to marry Stephanie McMahon? Wasn't it Kane who was supposed to be burned all over, and is Paul Bearer's son? Bad gimmicks can be overcome, but the fact is Mark's lack of perosnality and skill (except for lifting and bending things) will always hurt him. And, I hate to say it, but race doesn't help him out. A big redneck white guy who sucks has a better chance of getting over than a big Black guy who sucks.



"From this point on, I will prove that I am the best this bitchness has to offer, and if anybody wanna tempt ... test me, step to me like a man." -- Booker T

"Booker T, I know you don't want me; because it's obvious I beat your ass so bad you forgot where the barbershop was!" -- Scott Steiner
StaggerLee
Scrapple








Since: 3.10.02
From: Right side of the tracks

Since last post: 2 days
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Y!:
#11 Posted on

    Originally posted by Spaceman Spiff
    No, I shit on him because he can't sell, can't wrestle, can't talk, has no charisma, is slow & lumbering in the ring, and overall has no discernable worth as a pro wrestler.

    Whether that's "unfair" or not, ::shrug::



Sounds like Andre the Giant!
Faust
Salami








Since: 27.7.02

Since last post: 4198 days
Last activity: 4143 days
#12 Posted on

    Originally posted by Redhawk1810
    I think Mark can get over despite his old characters. Wasn't it The Undertaker who murdered his parents, died and went to Heaven, and wanted to marry Stephanie McMahon?


hmmmm . . . I thought it was more of a manslaughter than a murder. I thought the story was that he intentionally started a fire that ended up unintentionally killing his parents and burning Kane.

I don't remember anything about dying and going to Heaven . . . but I could be wrong . . .

anyone else remember?





"And in front of the entire world, I want to show my little boy that sometimes - just sometimes, you have to FIGHT to be a man." - Michael S. Hickenbottom, the man who does not take part in angles that conflict with his religion, swearing violent revenge on HHH in full view of his two-year-old son. 11:06 PM, EST. 08/05/02. This angle, which has gone from being a "clean" wrestling match to an all-out unsanctioned street fight for bloody revenge is apparently sponsored by the book of Joshua.
Net Hack Slasher
Banger








Since: 6.1.02
From: Outer reaches of your mind

Since last post: 3404 days
Last activity: 1823 days
#13 Posted on
    Originally posted by Faust
    I don't remember anything about dying and going to Heaven . . . but I could be wrong . . .

    anyone else remember.



It was at a Royal Rumble 94 vs. Yokozuna in a casket match. A bunch of heels jumped him and locked him in a casket the started rolling the casket out and it started smoking, they had a casket-cam and showed him dead on the screen above the entrance. He was dead I tell you! But then all of a sudden HIS EYES OPENED, and he said he would not job to death! and comeback at a future time to get his heat back. Then some funky stuff happened to the screen and traced his image and then exploded and then he was raised up to the heavens (or atleast to the top of the rafters) buh-gawd but not necessary "By God".

As for Mark Henry personally he's a lot less annoying then Rikishi. Actually I don't mind Mark too much, if he stays as resident lower-midcard guy. I have been hating his matches a lot less recently



(edited by Net Hack Slasher on 6.10.02 0423)


WWE new slogan "WWE: circling the drain"
Ana Ng
Blutwurst








Since: 6.8.02
From: Naples, FL, USA

Since last post: 3651 days
Last activity: 3225 days
#14 Posted on
Mark Henry sucks. SUCKS. He's not interesting, and my god people, he slept with his sister!

Actually, on the note of his past horrifying storylines, did you ever get the impression that the people in charge were sitting around one day, and one person said, "You know who will do ANYTHING we tell him to do? Mark Henry!" and then another person said "Nuh-uh! He wouldn't do *anything*" and the first guy said "You wanna bet?", so then they had him get a blowjob from a transvetite, give a speech about being a sex addict, make a stinky poop on GTV, tell his therapist on camera that he lost it to his sister, and still routinely does his sister, hook up with Mae Young and impregnate her with a big fake hand? And then the doubting guy was like "Ok, you're right. Mark Henry WILL do anything! Drinks are on me!"



As soon as you're born you start dying, so you might as well have a good time.
Phantom
Frankfurter








Since: 17.3.02

Since last post: 2189 days
Last activity: 2166 days
#15 Posted on
And worst of all, his matches.

He'll spend anywhere from 60% to 90% of the match dominating his opponent, only to lose the whole thing after taking one to two good hits. Henry Vs. Storm was a great example of this. Lance Storm landed maybe three solid offensive moves in the whole match, but he effectively knocked Henry out.
Punkinhed
Salami








Since: 23.1.02

Since last post: 4063 days
Last activity: 4038 days
#16 Posted on



Ah, so you'd feel better if he beat Lance Storm? Look at it this way, if they build him up as a powerhouse guy, and someone beats him, that's supposed to make them more impressive. I do feel sorry for his past storylines, it has to be hard to get credibility with an albatross like that around his neck. A lot of wrestlers have had stupid gimmicks and come back from them. Of course, they had more ability and talent than Mark does; I'll be the first to admit he's not the best, or even in the top ten. Net Hack was right: he should stay as a lower-midcarder.

How about this as a compromise: he fits and does the "strong guy" wrestler niche pretty well, and he has had some impressive and interesting spots. He's not incredibly talented, but he could be a lot worse (or he could dance and smash his ass into people).

Incidentally, saying he's slow and lumbering is silly. Of course he is, but so what? So's Kane. So's the Undertaker. So's Rikishi. So what? I'd prefer them to give him spots that showcase his strengths as opposed to showing his weaknesses, like his promos. And I'd enjoy seeing him as a big bullying heel, just for the hell of it.



Triple H is a dead ringer for "Buzzer" of the Dreadnoks. Just give him some mirror shades and teach him to say "Blimey, Zartan".
Spaceman Spiff
Knackwurst








Since: 2.1.02
From: Philly Suburbs

Since last post: 5 days
Last activity: 51 min.
AIM:  
#17 Posted on

    Originally posted by Punkinhed
    Incidentally, saying he's slow and lumbering is silly. Of course he is, but so what? So's Kane. So's the Undertaker. So's Rikishi. So what? I'd prefer them to give him spots that showcase his strengths as opposed to showing his weaknesses, like his promos. And I'd enjoy seeing him as a big bullying heel, just for the hell of it.

Well, I'm the one who said he's slow & lumbering, so I'll address this. I don't like Kane or Taker or Rikishi, either (although I was kinda digging Grumpy Old Man Taker). As for showcasing his strengths, then only show him backstage bending stuff. I'd enjoy it if Henry never showed up on my TV again, though.

And, just to show I'm not being an elitist or anything, I mark for Chuck Palumbo, Johnny the Bull, and Hugh Morrus.



Matthew: You would've loved it, David. A week in a foreign country, strange people, strange customs...
Dave: Oh, I know what you mean. I've been to Canada.
redsoxnation
Scrapple








Since: 24.7.02

Since last post: 293 days
Last activity: 293 days
#18 Posted on

    Originally posted by Punkinhed



    Ah, so you'd feel better if he beat Lance Storm? Look at it this way, if they build him up as a powerhouse guy, and someone beats him, that's supposed to make them more impressive. I do feel sorry for his past storylines, it has to be hard to get credibility with an albatross like that around his neck. A lot of wrestlers have had stupid gimmicks and come back from them. Of course, they had more ability and talent than Mark does; I'll be the first to admit he's not the best, or even in the top ten. Net Hack was right: he should stay as a lower-midcarder.

    How about this as a compromise: he fits and does the "strong guy" wrestler niche pretty well, and he has had some impressive and interesting spots. He's not incredibly talented, but he could be a lot worse (or he could dance and smash his ass into people).

    Incidentally, saying he's slow and lumbering is silly. Of course he is, but so what? So's Kane. So's the Undertaker. So's Rikishi. So what? I'd prefer them to give him spots that showcase his strengths as opposed to showing his weaknesses, like his promos. And I'd enjoy seeing him as a big bullying heel, just for the hell of it.






The 'strong guy' gimmick really did wonders for Ted Arcidi and Bill Kazmeier. It must be a rule, you get introduced as the world's strongest man, and you end up sucking. For further examples, look at Dino Bravo before and after he bulked up.



I want you to know, I agree with everything I've just said.
Faust
Salami








Since: 27.7.02

Since last post: 4198 days
Last activity: 4143 days
#19 Posted on

    Originally posted by Net Hack Slasher
      Originally posted by Faust
      I don't remember anything about dying and going to Heaven . . . but I could be wrong . . .

      anyone else remember.



    It was at a Royal Rumble 94 vs. Yokozuna in a casket match.



Ah yes, I remember now. That horrible affair. Yep. I had blocked it from my memory until now . . .



"And in front of the entire world, I want to show my little boy that sometimes - just sometimes, you have to FIGHT to be a man." - Michael S. Hickenbottom, the man who does not take part in angles that conflict with his religion, swearing violent revenge on HHH in full view of his two-year-old son. 11:06 PM, EST. 08/05/02. This angle, which has gone from being a "clean" wrestling match to an all-out unsanctioned street fight for bloody revenge is apparently sponsored by the book of Joshua.
InVerse
Bierwurst








Since: 26.8.02

Since last post: 9 hours
Last activity: 37 min.
#20 Posted on
Ok, I know I'm going to regret asking this, but what's the deal with Mark Henry sleeping with his sister? That must have been during the year I didn't watch wrestling because I didn't own a television.
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Took them long enough to follow my advice (The W). :-) I'll assume that they were just being judicious about where TNA is going ... (And if I had a way to watch ROH, that'd be even better.)
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