I was called for jury duty about a year or so ago, shortly after I turned 19. The previous November I participated in both the primary and general elections, so I thought it was pretty cool when I was called for jury duty shortly thereafter.

Heck of it is, I actually got on a jury, too. We were on an attempted robbery/attempted grand theft auto case. The defendant was approximately thirty years old, African-American, and we later found out that he had two previous convictions. Uh-oh, right?

Anyway. This guy walked out of a strip club late at night and walked a few blocks down to a car dealership. He broke in to the main office, grabbed some keys, turned on a car and left its engine running for a little while. At about that time, a police helicopter showed up and the dude bailed, running into an apartment complex before being captured by a canine officer. A screwdriver was confiscated from the suspect upon his arrest.

We got to actually watch the video, in night-vision, of the dude's attempted escape. Of course, once the police helicopter finds you, I figure you're pretty much toast, since the copter knows exactly where you are and can send as many additional units as it needs to. After watching the failed escape, the police helicopter's camera panned back to the parking lot of the car dealership. The engine of the car the guy tried to jack was shaded in a darker color, clearly showing that the engine had been turned on.

We heard testimony from various people including the police officer who was in the helicopter and the owner of the car dealership. The defendant even took the stand, saying that he'd merely opened the car door to �take a look at the inside of the car�, because he was interested in coming back later and maybe buying it. Ha.

Didn't take us very long to convict this guy at all, as you might expect. After waiting in the jury room for another few minutes, we were called out again. This latest conviction allegedly marked the third conviction for this suspect, so we needed to verify that was correct. Of course, three strikes and you're in for a long sentence in prison.

The prosecution attorney was right there to present the evidence of the guy's two prior convictions, and it was pretty clear-cut. He was declared a habitual offender under Indiana law, and presumably he'll be in prison for many years to come. As he should be, the idiot.

Very fun experience, overall. Plus, in the jury room, one of the jurors made a nice joke. �I can imagine this guy walking into the strip club. 'Hey, baby, is that a screwdriver in your pocket, or are you just happy to see me?'�

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�Now put that thing back where it came from or so help me-- Oh, hey! We're rehearsing a scene from the upcoming company play called Put That Thing Back Where It Came From Or So Help Me.�
--Mike Wazowski, Monsters, Inc.

Two-Time, Two-Time Randomly Selected Weiner of the Day, 5/27/02 and 7/3/02