For their last one-hour iMPACT!, TNA put out a pretty decent show. Nothing horrible, but nothing blow-away awesome, either.
-The show kicks off with Jim Mitchell and Judas Mesias calling out Sting outside the arena. Mitchell promises Sting's blood will pour. Man, this gets me PSYCHED for that Sting/Judas Mesias PPV match! Wait, they're NOT fighting at the PPV? -Team 3D v. "The Guru" Sonjay Dutt & Shark Boy. Comedy match ensues early on with Shark Boy biting one Dud and the other laughing at him. More comedy ensues with Dutt, as he kisses Ray's hand and Ray humors him for a bit before killing him dead with chops and a clothesline. Dutt and Shark Boy do manage to make a comeback, even hitting the Wazzup Drop! Sonjay takes things too far, though, when he asks for the tables, resulting in Devon demolishing him. 3D finishes off Shark Bait. Fun comedy match; nothing offensive here. The Dudz look to give Sharky the Scott Steiner job, but Dutt saves. -We go to the back with VKM. They talk about how they're sick of putting over the new guys and note that they take dumps bigger than some of the younger guys. Kip James says that they're the real superstars. Was that a shoot? Oy vey, did this have "Vince Russo" written all over it. -Motor City Machine Guns v. Lance Hoyt & Jimmy Rave. The MCMG continue to impress with their arsenal. They win a good match with a double enziguri. -Team 3D attacks after the bell, as TNA takes an inopportune commercial break. After the break, the Dudz superbomb Shelley through Sabin AND a table. Shark Boy tries to make the save, but gets a beatdown AND the chair to the throat that the Dudz couldn't get earlier. Nice segment! -Traci Brooks (w/Robert Roode) v. Jackie Moore (w/James Storm and a 6-pack of beer) v. Roxxi Laveaux (w/VKM) v. Christy Hemme (w/Hoyt & Rave) v. Gail Kim (w/Chris Harris). Winner gets #10 in the Bound for Glory Knockouts Gauntlet match. And there are so many bodies moving that I can't be counted to keep track. To make things that much more chaotic, the men get involved on the outside when Roode shoves Harris into Storm and knocks his beer to the ground. A Harris/Storm fight ensues. Would it KILL THEM to mention that these guys used to be tag team partners? Roxxi and Kim are the only ones left in the ring, but Kip James makes the distraction leading to Roxxi hitting the Dominator for the win. Just a big mess. -Video package for the Christian Cage/Samoa Joe feud, which still fails to get my hyped. This is followed by a video package for Judas Mesias, which is actually six shades of AWESOME! Unfortunately, they immediately follow that by going to Jeremy Borash with Jim Mitchell and the aforementioned Mesias, to remind the fans that Mesias is actually smaller than half the roster. Hell, he's barely taller than MITCHELL! -As Mitchell begins to talk, Sting jumps in out of nowhere and attacks. There's plunder everywhere and Sting wastes no time in using it, including a run-of-the-mill house door that just happens to be there. Sting tosses Mesias through the door and both guys brawl to the ring. Kurt Angle quickly runs in to attack Sting and both he and Mesias start the double-team beatdown. Rhino makes the save, as I still wonder why he's even involved in this feud, but Angle and Mesias get the upper-hand. Cue the music for ABYSS to make his big return and clear the ring. The show ends with a Mesias/Abyss staredown.
Again, a decent way to head into two-hour shows and certainly worlds better than the crap we've been fed over the past few weeks. I fail to be impressed by Judas Mesias, who just doesn't have that intimidation factor. Hey, I hate talentless lunks like the Great Khali as much as anyone, but sometimes, the situation DOES call for a larger wrestler, know what I mean?
This show actually felt like it was too short, considering how much of the roster was left off this week. But hey, isn't that the best way to hype next week's expansion into a second hour?
According to the Wrestling Observer (via 411), Homicide, Hernandez, Chris Sabin, Alex Shelley, and Sonjay Dutt have all been talking about leaving TNA. (Apparently they've been convinced to wait for the 2-hour shows, whereupon they'll [supposedly] get more airtime.) It makes me sad and furious that these guys are thinking of going elsewhere, shoved aside, while TNA scrambles frantically to pick up guys who hit their peaks a decade ago and weren't setting the world on fire even then.
Take this week -- man, the MMGs are AWESOME! They're so much fun to watch! And yet some goofus is apparently watching from backstage and saying, "well, they're alright for little guys, but -- hey, let's call Bull Buchanan!"
Their opponents looked okay -- I like Lance Hoyt in big man/little man teams, although Jimmy Rave is of course no Kid Kash. They seem into it, just like Christy wants them to be -- in fact, I would describe them as "Wrestling Earnest, Hemme's Way." *crickets*
Speaking of Hemme, I liked her cheerleader-split legdrop off the top rope in the women's match, even though it has possibly the WORST move name in the history of wrestling -- the "Flying Firecrotch Guillotine." RUSSOOOO *shakes fist*
The women's match was a mess, sure, but fun. Poor Roxxi has two choices -- break character and wrestle well, or stay in character and wrestle like Dementia. Roxxi kinda ended up vacillating between the two.
(I re-watched the Shimmer match between Roxxi and Amazing Kong -- man, Kong really killed Roxxi with that spinning backfist. I'm looking forward to Kong at Bound for Glory.)
It is impressive how pairing Dutt with Sharkboy does not elevate Sharky at all, but rather makes Dutt look like the biggest joke of a jobber that ever walked the Earth. Maybe they SHOULD let Dutt leave and hire someone else instead -- "hey, let's call Mideon!"
Falsie, I agree with you about Mesias. Even different ring gear would help, but I dunno how much.
Last 5 movies seen: Knocked Up **** - The Condemned * - The Valet *** - The Boss of it All ***1/2 - The Man From the Alamo ***
I was surprised to see the Dudleys tease another break-up for the sake of a comedy match. I do appreciate Ray going with it to such an extent before clobbering Dutt. I hate that new gimmick.
I understand the X Division belt is rumored to be phased out, but I still can't fathom why you'd have Dutt (the anti-gimmick guy) not simply feud with Lethal, who got a major push based on his Macho man impersonation. It's a logical storyline featuring two guys who can work.
VKM does nothing to impress me, although I do appreciate James unintentionally burying TNA with his comments. "We didn't need you when we were on top of the world [in the WWE], and we don't need you now!"
The MCMG vs. Rave/Hoyt match was awesome stuff, and it got some decent airtime. I have never liked Sabin more than I do know. I can live with the team's destruction at the hands of the Dudz; they just wrestled a match in fourth gear and were toot tired to fight back. But if the Dudz are killing every team they face, who's going to come in to beat them?
Mesias reminds me of a short Sean O'Haire, and it makes me miss the latter's run with he WWE.
"To be the man, you gotta beat demands." -- The Lovely Mrs. Tracker
Originally posted by MayhemAnd I could only hope for London/Kendrick vs. Sabin/Shelley matches.
Seeing as TNA seems intent on picking up old WWF/E guys it'd be a pretty good comeback for them to steal all TNA's young guys who might actually still be able to wrestle in a few years (if they'd ever use them).
How do you learn to fall off a twenty foot ladder?
Am I the only one who thinks that Judas Mesias looks like Pete (the housemate) from Shaun Of The Dead? That was the first impression I had of the guy and to be honest, it's difficult to take him as seriously.
That's just a wee bit too much (repeated bad pun intended). Keep it simple, and keep it down to Billy and Chuck. Goldust just enjoys messing with people's minds. I'll think of something witty later, I promise.