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The W - Pro Wrestling - iMPACT 6-7-07
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Karlos the Jackal
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Since: 2.1.02
From: The City of Subdued Excitement

Since last post: 33 days
Last activity: 11 hours
#1 Posted on | Instant Rating: 8.00
The King of the Mountain qualifying matches have been a great thing for the last month of Impact. The matches have all been pretty good, and it's pretty cool that the shows are centered around a bunch of guys wrestling for the right to wrestle again for the belt. Hooray! Tonight's KotM qualifying match: "Cowboy" James Storm vs. "Wildcat" Chris Harris!

Robert Roode vs. Jerry Lynn: Alright match that puts over Robert Roode as the cheating up-and-comer. Jerry Lynn gets in some offense -- including DDTing Roode right on top of his head -- but when Ms. Brooks distracts the ref, Roode takes advantage with a low blow, following it up with The Payoff (Perfectplex) for the win.

After the match, Eric Young runs down with a steel chair for the save. Roode takes off and leaves Ms. Brooks behind. Jerry Lynn grabs and restrains Ms. Brooks for Young, while Mike Tenay and Don West excitedly enthuse about how happy they will be to see two men gang up on a woman and smash her head in with a steel chair. Before Young can do it, though, Jim Cornette interrupts with his old "men won't beat up women in TNA" shtick. Whatevs! To placate the lustily booing crowd, Cornette puts Brooks in a match with Gail Kim...tonight!

Tomko is here (with Leticia) and is looking for Christian Cage (who changed his phone number after causing Tomko the loss last week -- ha).

Sting and Christopher Daniels are backstage. Daniels goes on about how he's learned so much from Sting -- about penance, vengeance, all the stuff Sting is always talking about. Daniels references himself as "Godlike." Sting says he has no idea what Daniels is talking about.

Ms. Brooks attacks Gail Kim backstage. Your'd think she could have at least gotten Roode to take a shot at Kim -- he kinda owes her, after all.

Backstage (still!), Black Machismo is talking about his upcoming match with Jake "The Snake" Roberts, while Kevin Nash tries to tell him that it's Sabin he's facing, not Roberts. Maybe this is why Lethal was reluctant to do his Macho Man impression -- he knew it would eventually take him over. Sonjay Dutt arrives, wearing a CRISP WHITE NEHRU JACKET. SWEET. He says he's all about nature and stuff; he's now "The Guru" Sonjay Dutt. Then there's a brief clip of the three of them meditating. Okay, Lethal saying "ohhhmmmm" in his Macho Man voice is pretty funny.

I was all set to complain about this being another step in the "X Division = Comedy Division" direction, but that was a really nice jacket.

Press conference for Slammiversary, interspersed with what appears to be local news coverage of same -- I have no idea if it's fake or not; it looks convincing. Some football player named Frank Wycheck is there; James Storm takes offense to his presence and spits beer on him. Wycheck responds by smashing Jeff Jarrett's guitar over Storm's head.

Jeremy Borash is with AJ Styles. Kurt Angle shows up to let Styles know that Angle is going to cripple him before the KotM match. Styles is all, "why would he say something like that?" Cage, in sunglasses and hoodie, pops out of a door and yanks Styles inside. Huh.

Gail Kim vs. Traci Brooks: Brooks is dressed the same as she always is -- not wrestling gear. Tenay calls her the "flotation floozy." Gail Kim is clearly the superior wrestler here, with a top-rope huracanrana and a lucha-style off-the-ropes arm drag, but Brooks gets her licks in, including a jawbreaker and a gutwrench suplex. Kim wins with a rollup (and not even one of her cool ones).

Roode is out after the match, allowing Brooks to lay Kim out. Brooks stands over her and yells at her -- but he never lays a hand on her, because only good guys do stuff like that.

Tomko is still looking for Cage -- he asks JB, who of course immediately rats Cage out.

Tomko finds Cage, sitting at a desk in his hoodie, pretending to read a magazine. (As Tomko yanks him out of the chair, Cage grabs the phone receiver and yells for security -- heh!) Tomko starts yelling at Cage, but Cage turns it around, laying a guilt trip on Tomko -- Cage was the guy who discovered him, he'd be nothing without Cage! He'll let Tomko know when his time has come, but for now -- it's time to think about Christian Cage! Tomko: "Fine." and he stalks off.

James Storm vs. Chris Harris: This is a qualifying match for the King of the Mountain match at Slammiversary. Storm has Jackie Moore with him. These two guys had one of the best matches I've seen this year -- and also the absolute worst.

This one falls in-between -- but definitely on the good side! They start out brawling through the crowd, and Harris jumps from a turnbuckle INTO the crowd, taking out Storm and two security guards. They start going for chairshots -- Harris gets busted open and drizzles blood for the rest of the match. Storm gets in the ring and goes for a baseball slide on Harris (still outside), but Harris grabs his legs and swings his face into the guardrail, busting him open.

They do a nice sequence about how alike the two are -- they both set up tables -- look at each other -- and then they each grab a garbage can lid and get in the ring. They stand toe to toe, exchanging lidshots, beating each other down to their knees. Finally, Harris grabs the actual can and kills Storm with it -- but he can't get the pin. Storm gets a catapult into a chair wedged in the turnbuckles.

Beck from commercial, and Storm is trying to skin the cat back into the ring -- but while Storm is upside down, Harris throws the garbage can into his face! On the outside, Storm avoids a spear by nailing Harris with a garbage can lid and lays him on the table -- he goes up the turnbuckle -- SOMERSAULT SENTON on Harris through the table!

They both recover and brawl up beside the wall next to the ramp -- Storm throws a beer bottle at Harris -- he's going for another when Harris spears Storm THROUGH the wall and they both collapse underneath the ramp platform.

Ref Rudy Charles announces they have a ten count to get back in the ring -- neither one does -- and that's it -- neither advances.

Angle, Joe, and Styles are all out, and brawling. In back one more time, Cage bursts into Cornette's office and demands to know who his opponent is -- Cornette says that it'll be an "easy" match, that it's someone that Cage has called a "punk" and "beneath" him -- and we're out. Kind of anticlimactic, there.

Man, it really kind of sucks. After a great match last month, and one of the best ever Impact matches tonight, Storm is fighting some ex-footballer at Slammiversary (and probably losing to him), while Harris is forming an out-of-nowhere team with Rhino to take on LAX.

I realize that this booking was probably done on-the-fly due to Jeff Jarrett not being at the tapings (following the passing of his wife), but I really wish that they could have pulled Harris out of his match with Rhino and let him win this and go on to KotM. It'd be easy -- Harris says, "sorry to let you down, Rhino, but I've got a chance to become champ!" and Rhino says, "no problem, man -- go for it! I've got an old buddy who will watch my back!" and out comes Sabu or Justin Credible or Mikey Whipwreck or Perry Saturn or Psicosis or Chilly Willy or The Musketeer or whoever. Doesn't matter who, because Harris almost certainly isn't essential to the story of this particular match.

Anyway. I'm not saying that they should just be handed any belts or anything, but man, they sure deserve better than what they're getting.

So: next week is the last KotM qualifier, with Christian Cage vs. Mystery Opponent. I'm predicting a Cage win -- I can't imagine anyone on the roster (especially minus the eight who have already their matches) who would go in before Cage -- I can't even think who he might be fighting. That means that there will probably be a "surprise entrant" at Slammiversary -- I'll assume that it's Jarrett.

--K



Last 5 movies seen: Guess Who's Coming to Dinner *** - Whole *** - Off Screen **1/2 - To Catch a Thief ***1/2 - Fay Grim ***/i>
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Since: 25.4.03
From: Nashville, TN

Since last post: 7 days
Last activity: 7 hours
#2 Posted on | Instant Rating: 5.27

I laughed out loud with Lethal's "Snake Roberts ruined my wedding" comment ...
kentish
Andouille








Since: 19.8.05
From: My Old Kentucky Home

Since last post: 19 days
Last activity: 5 days
#3 Posted on | Instant Rating: 2.50
The Machismo-Nash stuff was killing me! Next week looks pretty funny too. If he stays with The Guru gimmick, it doesn't seem too outlandish, it's not as bad as Saba Simba, or TL Hopper.

Too bad we had to have TWO commercial breaks during the main event, because what we saw was very good. Not sure who will fill the last spot either. JJ will get the sympathy vote I guess, but a face shouldn't necessarily want to get in without earning it. But he is on the poster.

I am really enjoying the Sting-Daniels angel as well. This show has improved quite a bit over the last few weeks.

Was anything announced regarding Scott Steiner being replaced?




Dean! Have you been shooting dope into your scrotum? You can tell me! I'm hip!
GodEatGod
Boudin rouge








Since: 28.2.02

Since last post: 15 days
Last activity: 7 days
#4 Posted on | Instant Rating: 5.75
I thought the Sting/Daniels stuff was horribly boring, which is odd, as I like both guys. The idea of the angle is good, but I don't really need to two of them backstage having conferences about their feelings, okay?

Christian continues to be the highlight of the show, between his Unabomber bit, his speech to Tomko and the classic closing of said speech: "Let's do what we do best: Worry about Christian Cage!"

Opening match was fine, but I just don't give a crap about Robert Roode and Ms. Brooks may be the least attractive woman in wrestling right now. Her breasts are terrifying.

The women's match was equally blah. Gail Kim good, Ms. Brooks bad. Her screaming kind of reminds me of Woman back in the good ol' days, though, I'll give her that.

The Nash/Dutt/Lethal stuff is excellent, although I wouldn't mind if it lead to something in-ring one of these days.

Storm/Harris was a very enjoyable, bloody, intense brawl, and it kind of sucked that they both got knocked out of the KotM. As said before, that probably leads to a 'mystery' entrant of Cornette's choosing.

I figure Christian faces Abyss next week, and has Tomko cost him his shot as payback, leading to a Christian/Tomko undercard match at Slammiversary. Not the best use of Christian, but it gives him plenty of chance to whine about being cheated out of his shot, and Christian whining is always good TV.



"Never piss off a hawk with a blowgun" - Conan O'Brien
Quezzy
Knackwurst








Since: 6.1.02
From: The Moon

Since last post: 15 days
Last activity: 2 days
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#5 Posted on | Instant Rating: 3.51
I pretty much agree. Harris and Storm have now had two excellent matches in a row. That could've been feud of the year and a classic tag team breakup feud if they didn't have to go with the injured eye gimmick and the blindfold match.

Lethal/Sonjay stuff was funny.

I thought the Daniels/Sting segment was pretty bad. Not only was it kind of boring but it's still not really clear what Sting told Daniels to do and how he misinterpreted it. It's just all very vague. If Daniels beats Sting in a match then that's a good thing though.

Jarrett is the most likely choice for the last spot, if he wants it. It's in Tennessee, he's the self-proclaimed King of the Mountain, he's been in all the matches before. But is he going to be back by then?

If not, I think rather than a Christian and Tomko undercard match Christian wins next week and Tomko gets the last spot somehow. Where does that leave Harris and Storm though? Do they wrestle again at the PPV? If it's as good as the last two I'd watch them wrestle again.

Nothing was announced regarding Scott Steiner. In fact, they still ran the interviews hyping the match even though it seems the match is off. I know the show is taped ahead of time but you would think they could take an interview out or something.



Lance's Response:

THAT IS AWESOME!
Karlos the Jackal
Lap cheong








Since: 2.1.02
From: The City of Subdued Excitement

Since last post: 33 days
Last activity: 11 hours
#6 Posted on | Instant Rating: 8.00
    Originally posted by Quezzy
    Where does that leave Harris and Storm though? Do they wrestle again at the PPV?
Nope, Storm is wrestling an ex-football player and it looks like Harris is teaming with Rhino vs. LAX (the latter isn't officially announced).
    Originally posted by Quezzy
    Nothing was announced regarding Scott Steiner. In fact, they still ran the interviews hyping the match even though it seems the match is off. I know the show is taped ahead of time but you would think they could take an interview out or something.
Yeah, it's still on their website. Maybe there's some hope that Scott will still be able to make it? I guess it doesn't hurt to give it 'til next week before deciding what to do.

--K



Last 5 movies seen: Guess Who's Coming to Dinner *** - Whole *** - Off Screen **1/2 - To Catch a Thief ***1/2 - Fay Grim ***/i>
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Can anybody tell me who this quote is attributed to... " Pain is simply weakness leaving the body , when I get done whipping your ass , you're gonna be the strongest man alive " . I read it somewhere but I don't remember who said it .
- Pheadfred, Can anybody .... (2002)
Related threads: iMPACT 5-31-07 - iMPACT! 5-24-07 - iMPACT! 5-17-07 - More...
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