You might have thought that this was a re-run of last week's show: Two King of the Mountain qualifiers, Awesome Kong destroys a fan pulled from the crowd, and AJ gets beat down at the end. It might explain why the show felt pretty dull to me.
Booker T and 3D are in the ring. Booker describes himself as "Royal T" (heh) and complains that his locker room smells like a "pissing playground" for rodents. They show off a large version of AJ Styles' upcoming trading card and complain that he's the bad guy here, not them: he's a wife-stealing adulterer!
LAX, Christian Cage, Rhino, and Samoa Joe eventually, after some more chit chat, chase them off.
Jay Lethal, SoCal Val, and Sonjay Dutt are here with Ace Young (?), who is going to sing at their wedding. He also accompanies them for their next match...
Jay Lethal & Sonjay Dutt vs. The Rock 'n' Rave Infection: Hermie Sadler, for some reason, is doing commentary. Standard fussery highlighted by Dutt getting HUGE air off a Hoyt German suplex. Christy Hemme trips up Lethal; as payback, Ace Young (?) trips up Hoyt, allowing Machismo to pin Rave with a rollup (the official finisher of the X Division!).
Jay Lethal demands that Dutt be his best man at the wedding, and Dutt shakes his hand (but we know better). Then they show an Ace Young (?) video with Val and Lethal rolling around. Here it is. (youtube.com)
The Beautiful People put a paper bag over Lauren's head and shove her aside. "Get to steppin'!"
Angelina Love vs. Roxxi: Roxxi has an entrance video now and has completely dropped the "Laveaux" and all traces of the voodoo gimmick. Match is okay. Love knees her way out of the Voodoo Drop (okay, that's the last trace, so obviously that needs a new name -- "Close Shave," perhaps?) and Velvet Sky sprays hairspray into Roxxi's eyes. Love gets the Straight to Hell (if you're a Judas Mesias fan) for the win.
The Beautiful People brown-bag Roxxi's head and lay in the boots. Gail Kim (on crutches) and ODB come out; ODB grabs one of Kim's crutches (leaving Kim, hilariously, hopping around) and charges the ring, chasing them off.
Jim Cornette is FURIOUS that Jeremy Borash allowed Kong to beat up a fan last week. Borash points out that it got the highest ratings of the show; Cornette switches his position immediately, as long as they "ont-day ell-tay the oss-bays."
Booker T (with 3D) arrives in Cornette's office and demands to use it as a dressing room, since his still smells bad.
Eric Young is in Sun Studios, looking for Elvis. Eric Young apparently only packed one shirt for this trip.
Jim Cornette is in the ring and announces two matches for Slammiversary: AJ Styles vs. Kurt Angle (already? They're not doing Styles vs., say, Tomko first?) and LAX vs. 3D. Kevin Nash is out now and offers to clear out Jim's office if Jim makes Nash the special enforcer for the KotM match at Slammiversary. Cornette agrees.
Abyss Abyss Abyss
Awesome Kong vs. um, someone -- Leeva Baines? I dunno. Kong KILLS HER DEAD. These "volunteers" are getting some NASTY Awesomebombs.
Booker and 3D are in Cornette's office. The dry-erase board on Cornette's wall, which previously had a countdown to Cornette's Retirement on it (only 3607 more days!), now says "BOOKER'S OFFICE - NO POO-PUTTS ALLOWED." Kevin Nash enters and suggests they leave. The bad guys counter that Kevin has no back up. Well, there's Louie. Louie who? Louie VILLE. And Nash chases them off (and smashes Cornette's fax machine for emphasis).
There's a video recap of the the history of Rhino and James Storm, but it gets interrupted in mid-sentence (nice touch) because the two subjects have started brawling backstage. They make their way out to the ring...
Rhino vs. James Storm: This is a qualifying match for the KotM match. We've seen this a number of times and there's nothing new here. Rhino wins with a Gore.
Christian Cage vs. Tomko: Here's the second KotM qualifier. It's better than the last match but they never really seem to get in the groove. Unprettier attempt is countered into a TKO, which is countered into another Unprettier -- nice -- for the pin.
(So the KotM match will be: Samoa Joe vs. Booker T vs. Robert Roode vs. Rhino vs. Christian Cage, with Kevin Nash a special enforcer. Early prediction: Nash tries to screw Joe; Joe wins anyway; we get Joe vs. Nash at Victory Road.)
AJ Styles and Karen Angle are going out to the ring because Styles has something to say to Karen. But he's blindsided by Kurt Angle (he's not even supposed to be here tonight!) and left laying.
Karen and Kurt are in the ring -- Kurt calls Karen a whore, and she slaps him. AJ Styles runs out -- but so do Tomko, 3D, and Booker, for a beatdown redux. Christian Cage figures one beatdown a month is plenty, and runs out to help, but I guess he forgot to text Rhino first; alone, he's not enough to turn the tide, and the lopsided beatings continue.
As it turns out, AJ's "revenge" turned out to kind of suck for him.
I'm sensing a 10-man tag match for Victory Road, perhaps.
--K
(edited by Karlos the Jackal on 30.5.08 0308) Last 5 movies seen: Dr. Cyclops *** - Strange Wilderness * - The Incredible Shrinking Man *** - The Brave One *** - Paddle to the Sea ***1/2
The only reason I would say they should do AJ/Angle and not AJ/Tomko is because Slammiversary is supposed to be their Wrestlemania and AJ vs. Kurt is really the biggest feud/match they got. Plus I don't think they want Angle and Joe in the title match again so soon so Angle is out of the KOTM and needs somebody else to wrestle. If they do go with a 10 man next month then I say have AJ vs. Tomko after that to end this thing. Then give AJ a shot at Joe if the Nash feud is over.
10 man tag for Victory Road does seem likely but I hate it when they put so many people in one match. The rest of the card is going to be weak, even if TNA does have some really great lower card guys.
(edited by Quezzy on 30.5.08 1337)
(edited by Quezzy on 30.5.08 1338) Lance's Response:
Originally posted by QuezzyThe only reason I would say they should do AJ/Angle and not AJ/Tomko is because Slammiversary is supposed to be their Wrestlemania and AJ vs. Kurt is really the biggest feud/match they got. Plus I don't think they want Angle and Joe in the title match again so soon so Angle is out of the KOTM and needs somebody else to wrestle. If they do go with a 10 man next month then I say have AJ vs. Tomko after that to end this thing. Then give AJ a shot at Joe if the Nash feud is over.
10 man tag for Victory Road does seem likely but I hate it when they put so many people in one match. The rest of the card is going to be weak, even if TNA does have some really great lower card guys.
Slammiversary is more SummerSlam. Bound For Glory is supposed to be their Wrestlemania. I really would have prefered Tomko, because it's logical to take out the partner that betrayed him first. Plus, for non-kayfabe reasons, I want Angle as healthy as possible.
Cena can't be beat because he's some unholy genetic recombinate of superstars past. I mean, you might as well call him John "Realest of the Real, Sargent Rock - Cold - A - Mania" Cena.
If TNA just treated me like I was a little smarter I could handle their show, but they are just all over the place with garbage. Maybe, I just picked a bad night to give them another shot. It's just that if they really want to be WCW in their dying days then they should just reach for the stars and do it. I don't even care that the roster is a rehashed mismash of has-beens. Just put them in some watchable matches and/or angles.
A mishmash of hasbeens? I don't know what program you're watching. Sting, Nash, Steiner and at least wrestling-wise Kurt are all used sparingly. None of them have been used poorly or pushed too much.
Right now their title holders are Joe, LAX, and Petey. Their number one feud has AJ Styles in it, the women's division is getting pushed more than anything, and the main event at the next PPV is Joe vs. Rhino vs. Christian vs. Booker vs. Roode. I don't see any "hasbeens" in that bunch.
Originally posted by QuezzyJoe vs. Rhino vs. Christian vs. Booker vs. Roode. I don't see any "hasbeens" in that bunch.
I dunno, I think two out of those five have their best days behind them. I'm pretty disappointed that Rhino eliminated Storm, and although I like Booker a lot, I don't know that I need to see him in the ring anymore.
I agree with your other examples.
--K
Last 5 movies seen: Dr. Cyclops *** - Strange Wilderness * - The Incredible Shrinking Man *** - The Brave One *** - Paddle to the Sea ***1/2
Originally posted by QuezzyJoe vs. Rhino vs. Christian vs. Booker vs. Roode. I don't see any "hasbeens" in that bunch.
I dunno, I think two out of those five have their best days behind them. I'm pretty disappointed that Rhino eliminated Storm, and although I like Booker a lot, I don't know that I need to see him in the ring anymore.
I agree with your other examples.
--K
Just because someone's better days are behind them doesn't mean they are has beens. The same can be said for Undertaker and Shawn Michaels, but they are still putting on great matches.
Surely you don't wish Booker would retire now that he is back in heel King mode?
"I like your Christ, I do not like your Christians. Your Christians are so unlike your Christ."
Originally posted by QuezzyA mishmash of hasbeens? I don't know what program you're watching. Sting, Nash, Steiner and at least wrestling-wise Kurt are all used sparingly. None of them have been used poorly or pushed too much.
I was watching a show that still features the Dudley Boys weekly, still falls back to more Kevin Nash, and still uses Rhino even though no one has cared about him in 5 years. Like I said before though, that isn't what really bothers me. It's that they're all running around doing the same stupid shit every week. I think part of the problem for me is it is hard to really get into the matches because Mike Tenay is just horrid to listen to these days.
The show still has it's moments, it just seems like I miss a lot of them when I flip away from some of the retarded and childish crap. It's just not a show that I can sit down and watch right now without wondering what else is on.
The attitude (at least in public interviews, don't know about in the locker room) came out *after* it was clear he'd never get a run on top. I have a hard time imagining RVD saying the things he's said had he either: a) been a world title holder, or b)