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The W - Pro Wrestling - iMPACT! 3-19-09 "Sting: Whose Side is He On?"
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Karlos the Jackal
Lap cheong








Since: 2.1.02
From: The City of Subdued Excitement

Since last post: 10 days
Last activity: 22 hours
#1 Posted on | Instant Rating: 8.00
Kurt is out first with a mic and with the rest of MEM -- including Sting (!) and Scott Steiner (!!), who seems to have a hoodie that zips up over his entire face, like a mask; apparently Joe cut off his ears or nose or something hideous like that (shades of gray!).

This promo goes on FOREVER -- upshot is, Kurt and Sting can still work together, and they're going to team up tonight against Jeff Jarrett and Mick Foley.

Motor City Machine Guns vs. No Limit: This is a blast -- I hope they feud until Lockdown and have another match there, a nice long one. No Limit is Naito and Yujiro, and they are the guys from whom MCMG won the IWGP Junior Heavyweight Tag Team Championships -- MCMG came out wearing the belts, and it looks like No Limit has come to America to take them back. (No Limit come out accompanied by Kiyoshi, by the way, and I wish TNA could find another "Japanese" theme song -- this one's kind of played out.)

Anyway, fun match filled with double-team moves. No Limit pulls out the win when Naito turns a top-rope huracanrana into a sunset flip and pins Sabin.

After the match, Beer Money lay out No Limit. They are great! (They no longer have Jackie with them -- dirt sheet rumor says she's being transitioned to a backstage role as agent for the Knockouts -- along with Kip James. I'll miss her!)

Team 3D comes out! Beer Money gives them props and then challenges them to a match at Lockdown for the TNA titles -- Brother Ray says, well, why not the IWGP Tag Titles, too? (The heavyweight ones that 3D are carrying, not the junior ones that MCMG have.)

Awesome Kong & Raisha Saeed vs. Taylor Wilde & ODB: Cody Deaner is in the crowd for this one. Two things: 1) I really think Wilde is starting to hit her stride -- I think she's markedly crisper and sharper than she was when she first came in. 2) Unlike a lot of people, I don't mind Cheerleader Melissa playing Raisha Saeed -- for one thing, I like her ring gear, and for another, I don't see any reason to think that the Cheerleader version would be getting any more ring time than Saeed currently is.

This is a fine little match that ends with Wilde getting a rollup on Kong (amusingly, Wilde isn't even touching the mat during the pin, Kong's so big!). This reminds me of the whole "Shelton Benjamin's got HHH's number" angle from a while back.

Kong is PISSED and beats down the faces -- this brings Cody Deaner down to defend his woman, ODB -- Kong regards him balefully and leaves. OH MAN Kong vs. Deaner at Lockdown please!

Abdul Bashir vs. Samoa Joe:Just like Destination X, Joe gets disqualified almost immediately and then he drags Bashir "offstage." This new gimmick -- "Joe doesn't actually have matches anymore" -- sucks pretty bad.

Beautiful People are backstage -- the absent Kip, they say, is on "probation" -- and Madison Rayne still has to pass some tests before she's a full-fledged Beautiful Person. Tonight, she'll take on the Governor!

AJ Styles is here with his new belt -- Mike Tenay puts him over as the first-ever TNA "Grand Slam" champion! Jim Cornette is here, too, and explains that when Booker signed the contract he also signed over the right for possession of his "$200,000" belt, thus explaining why Booker's "vanity championship" is now a part of the regular rotation.

Styles says that this is a "small step for AJ Styles, but a giant leap for TNA and The Originals." He says that "The Originals" have to take care of the Main Event Mafia themselves, without the help of guys like Team 3D and Rhino. Interesting -- also note that he did not say "Frontline" even one time. Something of a re-start here -- could be a good thing, I think, although they already blew it once -- at least they realize it.

Styles says that he'll defend his title against any deserving wrestler. Booker T comes out -- he wants that first title shot! Styles: "I said, 'a deserving wrestler.' You are no more than a paper champion. You made this belt up. So there's nothing you can do, because you don't deserve it." Oh, man, that was AWESOME.

Madison Rayne vs. The Governor: Daffney's hair is a little less Palin-esque tonight, pulled back, but she's still wearing the "power suit." I do like the Tazz-style taped feet, though. Madison fails the test, falling victim to a small package, despite the best cheating efforts of the Beautiful People.

After the match, the heels get their revenge by pulling out some scissors and hacking away at the Governor's hair. Hopefully, this will lead to a gimmick change (see: Roxxi), although it may not lead to a push (see: Roxxi).

Somewhere backstage, Samoa Joe has strung Bashir upside down and is threatening him with the tribal knife, but eventually he turns to the kendo stick and starts beating the CRAP out of Bashir. He tells Bashir that he should go "back to where he came from" -- according to Wikiedia, that would be Minneapolis. What's with the torture porn stuff? I'm going to start calling him Saw-moa Joe. (Get it? SAW? Like the movie? C'mon!)

Kurt Angle and Sting vs. Mick Foley and Jeff Jarrett: Well, Kurt Angle beats the hell out of Foley, at one point giving him an Angle Slam onto the CONCRETE floor. (Around here is where Big Rocco and Sallie Boy, MEM security, interfere, until Team 3D runs them off -- oh, man, THAT match is going to suck.) At another point Angle pins Foley but pulls him up before the 3 -- Sting complains about this, and pay attention, it's important later.

Eventually, the ref bumps, of course, and Angle goes after Foley with a chair -- JJ kicks him in the groin, and goes for the guitar. Sting takes that away. It's musical foreign objects! Foley is up -- gets the chair -- Angle chooses discretion over valor -- and Foley kills Sting with the chair! Three count! Jeff is confused!

After the commercial, Sting gets back up and challenges Foley to a match at Lockdown. Jeremy Borash finds Foley in back and Foley cuts a nice promo, saying that he's fine with Angle beating the crap out of him, because "that's how the game is played. But you know what's not fine, JB? Out of the corner of my bad ear, I hear the words [from Sting], 'he's had enough, that's enough, just pin him.' YOU CONDESCENDING LITTLE SON OF A [BEEP]. WHO THE HELL ARE YOU TO TELL ME WHEN I'VE HAD ENOUGH? You making all the decisions now? You the 'Decider'? I'LL tell YOU when I've had enough, AND IT'S NOT YET." Foley accepts Sting's challenge -- at Lockdown, he'll tear him apart!

What I can't quite figure out is if this is a heel turn for Mick -- what do you think?

--K

(edited by Karlos the Jackal on 20.3.09 0138)

Last 5 movies seen: Dog Day Afternoon n/a - Making an American Citizen **1/2 - Milk ***1/2 - Happy-Go-Lucky ***1/2 - Role Models ****
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Bockwurst








Since: 5.11.08
From: Lake Forest, IL

Since last post: 4 days
Last activity: 1 day
#2 Posted on | Instant Rating: 5.65
The Quick and Dirty for TNA Impact 3.19.09, from the Impact Zone, Orlando, FL. Impact now has pyro!

* Did you catch Don West saying that he'd never seen Joe snap like "he did last night"? I know this show is taped on Monday, so I'll forgive West the slip of tongue, but how does it get by post-production?

- After a recap of recent events, MEM come down, including Scott Steiner, who looks like a villain out of the latest from The Mummy franchise. Angle says that at Destination X, all his predictions came true and Sting showed his true colors. He makes an utterly unnecessary reference to the Montreal Screwjob and gives Sting ten seconds to explain himself. Sting claims to have been true to the Mafia since day one. He says he owes nothing to Kurt. Nash agrees, but he says Sting has to prove himself to the Mafia after having his hand raised in victory on two consecutive PPVs. Angle says he'll have the chance tonight, since it's Angle/Sting v Jarrett/Foley tonight. Jarrett comes out to remind him exactly who books the matches. Angle accuses Jarrett of protecting Sting, which makes no sense. Sting is up for this, but says that Foley is done with wrestling. Foley comes out and gets in a nice line, "Once in a while, wrestlers wrestle." Jarrett tries to reason with Foley, but Angle goads him to accept the match. Jarrett promises that "this ends tonight." I think otherwise. Excellent mic work, nonetheless.

Match 1: No Limit (Yujiro Takahashi and Tetsuya Naito) over the Motor City Machine Guns when Naito pinned Sabin off a rana reversal in about 5 minutes. A truncated spotfest, but if that's your poison, you'll love it. **3/4 on the PES. I must call out the poor presentation of No Limit (who didn't get even an introduction graphic), which caused me to think of them just as two generic Japanese guys.

- Postmatch, Beer Money hit the ring and lay waste to No Limit. They call out 3-D. Ray tries to talk but Roode shuts him up. He says they get no love despite proving themselves night after night. Roode says they'll prove themselves again at Lockdown by challenging 3-D to a title match. 3-D says to make it fair, they'll put the IWGP Tag Titles on the line.

- Elsewhere, Foley rambles on about pumpkin pie while Jarrett throws a fit. Foley tells him to relax, since this is the biggest main event in Impact's history.

Match 2: ODB and Taylor Wilde over Awesome Kong and Raisha Saeed when Wilde pinned Kong with a crucifix in about 4 minutes. This is a better showcase of the talent in the Knockouts division. Wilde is good as the underdog. ODB is...strange. A decent enough match, going about ** on the PES. Postmatch, Kong does some bitch-killing, but Cody Deaner runs in from the crowd to save ODB.

- Backstage, Angle and JB discuss all the bad things that Angle has done in recent times. Angle notes that he forgot about kicking Foley in the balls. Funny. JB speculates that this bad behavior cost him the match at the PPV but Angle says he had no choice.

Match 3: Sheik Abdul Bashir over Samoa Joe by DQ when Joe punched the ref after about 20 seconds. Postmatch, Joe drags Bashir through the curtain, just like he did to Steiner. See, I don't mind having this kind of match on TV because it works as a nice piece of character development. But to do it on PPV is not the way to go, since you know there were people who paid for that PPV specifically to see Joe return and wrestle.

- Backstage, Lauren catches up with the Beautiful People. They say that Kip is on probation and should never be mentioned again. They won't allow Rayne to talk since she's still going through her initiation. They threaten the Governor and promise to take on "The Beast" the week after.

- Cornette introduces AJ Styles as the new Legends Champ. He says that he tricked Booker into signing the belt over to TNA when he signed the contract to face Styles. Styles says the belt will now represent hope and faith in TNA. He says he'll defend the belt against worthy challengers. That leads to Booker coming out to rail on him. Booker wants a rematch, but AJ calls him a paper champion. They traed insults and leave their own separate ways. This was a nice ploy to get the title some value.

Match 4: The Governor over Madison Rayne via rollup in about 3 minutes. Decent enough match, about your average Diva match. *1/4 on the PES. Postmatch, Rayne cuts off quite a lot of The Governor's hair.

- Backstage, Joe has Bashir hanging upside down and he has his fuckin sling blade. He says no one wants Bashir here and that he should go home. He makes him hold the blade between his teeth and beats on him with something resembling a broomstick. Disturbing.

- Rough Cuts on Devon.

Match 5: Mick Foley and Jeff Jarrett over the Main Event Mafia (Angle/Sting) when Foley pinned Sting after a chairshot in about 11 minutes. To tell the truth, I didn't expect this to have any kind of a clean finish. That match was only so-so, but it did an excellent job of pushing the angle forward. ***1/2 on the PES.

- Postmatch, Sting says he remembers hearing Foley talking about Sting making his career. At Lockdown, Sting promises to finish Foley's career. "Lights, Camera, Action! It's showtime!" Classic. Angle is enjoying all this. Foley is backstage, and says he was inspired by Sting himself. Foley says that it pissed him off that Sting was telling Angle to pin Foley all the time, because "Who the hell are you to say when I've had enough?" Foley promises to tear him apart at Lockdown. Oh, and there's a 20-man gauntlet match next week to determine some of Angle/Jarrett's teammates for Lethal Lockdown.

- End show.

Wrestling Counter: 24 minutes.

-->In a drastic improvement upon recent trends, this was an Impact which I enjoyed for the majority of the time. The did a fantastic job hyping up the main event and delivered a solid angle. It's good to see that the main event build has started in a structured manner for Lockdown. I can't wait to see Yujiro and Naito mix it up with MCMG again, preferably on the larger stage. Foley has delivered the intensity necessary with his promos and has done a great job of covering the rather lame logic behind his actions. Angle and Sting have played their characters well enough, and it is working. The attempt to make the Legends Title actually mean something is also a welcome change. The only problem I had with this show was the Joe bullshit. He's looking a bit out of shape and a lot like an Umaga clone; I remember where it used to be the other way around. And that knife nonsense has to stop.

-->PES: ***1/4. Yes, I'm shocked too.




Forfeit the game, before somebody else takes you outta the game, and puts your name to shame
Cover up your face, you can't run the race
The pace is too fast, you just won't last
- "Points Of Authority" - Linkin Park
Shem the Penman
Toulouse








Since: 16.1.02
From: The Off-Center of the Universe (aka Philadelphia)

Since last post: 266 days
Last activity: 64 days
#3 Posted on | Instant Rating: 4.25
I never thought Wilde was that bad -- but she was, and still isn't, terribly credible as the Kong-killer TNA wanted her to be.

And were my eyes deceiving me, or were there a couple of guys holding "Cute Kip" signs during the Rayne/Governor match? (And why can the Governor afford to build a bridge to nowhere, but she can't afford some wrestling boots?)






"The object of persecution is persecution. The object of torture is torture. The object of power is power. Now do you begin to understand me?"
Matt Tracker
Scrapple








Since: 8.5.03
From: North Carolina

Since last post: 1 day
Last activity: 22 min.
#4 Posted on | Instant Rating: 6.92
    Originally posted by Shem the Penman
    I never thought Wilde was that bad -- but she was, and still isn't, terribly credible as the Kong-killer TNA wanted her to be.

    And were my eyes deceiving me, or were there a couple of guys holding "Cute Kip" signs during the Rayne/Governor match? (And why can the Governor afford to build a bridge to nowhere, but she can't afford some wrestling boots?)



Bridge To Nowhere is an excellent name for a finisher. Make this happen, TNA.



"To be the man, you gotta beat demands." -- The Lovely Mrs. Tracker
Quezzy
Knackwurst








Since: 6.1.02
From: The Moon

Since last post: 4 days
Last activity: 3 hours
AIM:  
#5 Posted on | Instant Rating: 3.58
Did I hear correctly? Kip James has a backstage role? Does this mean he is off camera from now on? This is the best Impact ever!

AJ's new new group is interesting but who will join? Joe doesn't seem like the team player these days. MCMG are the kind of dicks that don't need to be in what I assume will be a face group. Beer Money on the other hand are the kind of dicks people can cheer. My vote is for AJ/Daniels/Beer Money.



Lance's Response:

THAT IS AWESOME!
oldschoolhero
Knackwurst








Since: 2.1.02
From: nWo Country

Since last post: 1989 days
Last activity: 1923 days
#6 Posted on | Instant Rating: 9.00
Great promo by Foley, but it doesn't change the fact that it's a guy who's essentially been inactive for nine years challenging for the world title. Plus, they're talking about the original Foley/Sting match as if its some famous classic revered by marks and smarts alike the world over. It's not. The only portion of today's audience-at-large who've probably seen it are those who own Foley's WWE DVD. Meanwhile, Joe's dressing as Umaga and taking kidnap lessons from Yamaguchi-san.



"And here...we...go."
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And here, I was really hoping he would come back as Oz. It's pure Bling-Bling, bay-bee!!
- byort, Diesel? (2003)
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