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The W - Pro Wrestling - iMPACT! 1/3/08 - Land of 1000 Gauntlets
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Karlos the Jackal
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Since: 2.1.02
From: The City of Subdued Excitement

Since last post: 42 days
Last activity: 6 hours
#1 Posted on | Instant Rating: 8.00
I have a meeting tomorrow morning, so SERIOUSLY this time guys this will be short.

This Impact had two sections: The "in ring" section, which consisted of four gauntlet matches, and the "at home" section, which was "Live via Satellite" from AJ Styles' granny's house, as Jeremy Borash tried to get the scoop on which side AJ would choose.

Let's do the last section first. This was pretty dumb, but, and I apologize, I laughed several times. AJ was holed up in a bedroom and various family members and friends -- his sister, Mary Jane ("MJ, please" -- ha!) Styles, his coach, his priest -- told stories about AJ.

Inevitably, Styles would burst out of his room to deny whatever they were saying. He didn't actually wet himself in high school when faced with wrestling the toughest girl in the county -- "I spilled Mountain Dew all over myself! That wasn't pee! I work very well under pressure, thank you very much!"

When his sister threatens to tell the story about when she caught him in the bathroom "being frisky," he says "MJ -- you're ugly! Oh, can you get me a bologna sandwich? And a YooHoo?" When his priest talks about how AJ should choose "Christian, of course!" AJ counters with, "we're Baptist!"

At the end of the show, AJ was ready to announce his decision. "Cage!" Family and friends: "Yaay!" Styles: "No, wait -- Angle!" Family and friends: "Um, yay!" Styles: "No, wait, uh -- Cagle!" Family and friends: "Um, what?"

So, in the end, Styles still hasn't made a decision. Tomko, on the other hand, has -- he chooses Tomko. He likens it to deciding who he'd be willing to take a bullet for, and as he tells Kurt, "if you and Christian went down in a blaze of glory, I don't think my feelings would be hurt."

The other section of tonight's show was the four gauntlet matches. Each match concerned a different division -- Tag, Knockouts, X, and World. The entry order was determined by Jim Cornette's feelings on their rankings, and their elimination order helps determine their future ranking. (I'm a sucker for rankings, but this might be overkill.)

Quick notes:
TAG: VKM, LAX, R&R, 3D, MMG. VKM did horribly, so there's some justice there. MMG win by pinning R&R -- we came back from commercial to see about eight second of awesome doubleteam moves and a pin, so huh. After the match, 3D and Devine grab Sabin and Shelley and smash their hands with a kendo stick, to make it harder for them to climb the Ultimate X cables on Sunday. That's pretty smart!

KNOCKOUTS: Angelina Love, Ms. Brooks, Jackie Moore, Velvet Sky, Christy Hemme, Awesome Kong, ODB, Roxxi Laveaux. Kong came out last, of course, but was eliminated due to the combined efforts of Moore, ODB, and Leveaux. After Moore went out, ODB and Laveaux -- who are clearly number 3 and 4 in the division after Kong and Kim, even before this match -- went at it, with ODB getting the pin with the Thesz Breasz Press.

X: Sonjay Dutt, Petey Williams, Johnny Devine, Elix Skipper, Shark Boy, Senshi. Note that there are two fewer participants in this match than there were in the Knockouts match. Wow. It comes down to Petey and Senshi (why is the guy who quit getting more of a push than he was before?) and Petey wins it with the Destroyer. My question, I guess, is why wasn't Scott Steiner in this match? He's got a title shot, after all.

WORLD: Booker T, James Storm, Abyss, Kevin Nash, Christian Cage, Samoa Joe, Black Reign, Chris Harris, Kaz, Rellik, Robert Roode, Eric Young, Scott Steiner, Judas Mesias. Booker T insisted on coming out first to prove that he can work his way to the top. Cage gets in a fight with Kurt Angle on the way out; Angle slams Cage into a ringpost. While Cage is laid out, it comes down to Joe and Nash in the ring -- to show solidarity (Oh! I forgot! At the beginning of the show, Jim Cornette made Nash and Joe into a tag team -- against their wishes -- to challenge Styles & Tomko for the belts!), Nash eliminates himself to give Joe the win. I guess Nash intended to give Joe the win by countout, since the over-the-top-rope stip is not in effect for the last two guys. Of course, it IS still in effect -- since Cage was never actually eliminated, and sneaks into the ring to roll Joe up for the win!

And that's the show. I don't have time to check the quotes, so assume those are paraphrased, and I didn't check the order of entrance (or make any attempt to be accurate) so don't trust that for the pre-Impact ranking. Yeah!

--K



Last 5 movies seen: Shoot 'Em Up ***1/2 - American Gangster **** - I Am Legend ***1/2 - Enchanted ***1/2 - Once ***1/2
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hansen9j
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Since: 7.11.02
From: Riderville, SK

Since last post: 3 days
Last activity: 19 hours
#2 Posted on | Instant Rating: 9.00
    Originally posted by Karlos the Jackal
    I don't have time to check the quotes, so assume those are paraphrased, and I didn't check the order of entrance (or make any attempt to be accurate) so don't trust that for the pre-Impact ranking. Yeah!

    --K


If only there was some written document we could use as a guide...

Two problems with rankings:

A) TNA has done this a bunch of times. Every organization at some time has done this. It NEVER sticks.

B) Three different tag teams are technically #1 contenders. MCMGs, BG James & Undecided, and Samoa Joe & Kevin Nash. So why is the title shot going to the team that has never teamed before?



A Knight of Prosperity... cajun style.

Word Up, Thome
Hokienautic
Toulouse








Since: 2.1.02
From: Blacksburg VA

Since last post: 2 days
Last activity: 1 hour
#3 Posted on
Okay, so let me get this straight. They end last week's show with a cliffhanger, Styles IN THE RING about to announce who he chose and this week ... they have a bunch of vignettes of people talking about who he SHOULD choose? Did they at least show what happened at the end of last week's show after they went off the air? And what happened to the deadline?

(edited by Hokienautic on 4.1.08 1302)
Karlos the Jackal
Lap cheong








Since: 2.1.02
From: The City of Subdued Excitement

Since last post: 42 days
Last activity: 6 hours
#4 Posted on | Instant Rating: 8.00
    Originally posted by hansen9j
    If only there was some written document we could use as a guide...
Heh, I forgot about that. Looking at the script, I'll point out that it isn't, in fact, exact. Some parts are closer than others, but none of the promos are word-for-word. (I say this not having read it thoroughly.) It's originally written like dialog (for whatever reason) and then the individual wrestler delivers it in their own way.

***EDIT -- I notice that some of the "action" stuff is also not exact -- compare Kurt & Cage's interaction during the final gauntlet in script form to how it actually went down.

    Originally posted by hansen9j
    Two problems with rankings:

    A) TNA has done this a bunch of times. Every organization at some time has done this. It NEVER sticks.

    B) Three different tag teams are technically #1 contenders. MCMGs, BG James & Undecided, and Samoa Joe & Kevin Nash. So why is the title shot going to the team that has never teamed before?
A) I agree, and it bugs me, but TNA got around it (in an annoyingly vague way) by saying that the order of elimination will help determine ranking, combined with their prior ranking and whatnot. This allows them to use the gauntlet results however they want, or ignore them completely, without having to remember who the #7 contender is or anything.

B) MMG is otherwise occupied, and BG hasn't yet determined who his partner will be. Also, Cornette is established as being, first and foremost, concerned with ratings and buyrates, which allows TNA to sweep a lot of goofy booking decisions under the kayfabe "Cornette thinks it'll be good for business" rug.

    Originally posted by Hokienautic
    Did they at least show what happened at the end of last week's show after they went off the air? And what happened to the deadline?
Annoyingly, they did not.

--K

(edited by Karlos the Jackal on 4.1.08 1218)


Last 5 movies seen: Shoot 'Em Up ***1/2 - American Gangster **** - I Am Legend ***1/2 - Enchanted ***1/2 - Once ***1/2
kentish
Andouille








Since: 19.8.05
From: My Old Kentucky Home

Since last post: 4 days
Last activity: 3 days
#5 Posted on | Instant Rating: 4.42
In a long line of bad/gay outfits for Billy Gunn, the one he had on last night has to be the worst.




"I like your Christ, I do not like your Christians. Your Christians are so unlike your Christ."

-- Mahatma Gandhi
Quezzy
Knackwurst








Since: 6.1.02
From: Pittsburgh, PA

Since last post: 1 hour
Last activity: 1 hour
#6 Posted on | Instant Rating: 5.19
I like the idea of a rankings. It's something that would make them different from WWE. But like hansen said, nobody ever sticks to the idea.

I thought the women's gauntlet was the best of the night. The division continues to be great and after the Ultimate X match (the kendo stick to the wrists was a pretty neat idea) I'm most looking forward to Kim/Kong at the ppv.

The X Division really is pretty weak with Daniels gone, Senshi about to leave, MCMG in the tag division, and Joe and AJ in the main event, but I'm not sure any of them should be moved other than Daniels but they've screwed him up so many times I'm not sure bringing him back would help. If the division stays the same I don't think I'd take the belt off Machismo for a long time.

In the AJ stuff the Coach, MJ, and the priest were the type of cheese you'd see on Indy shows. AJ was really funny though when a year ago he would've been just as bad as the rest of them.




Lance's Response:

THAT IS AWESOME!
2P4E
Boerewors








Since: 4.1.05
From: SE12, London, UK.

Since last post: 477 days
Last activity: 2 days
#7 Posted on
Although i hope it doesn't happen for quite a long time, an eventual Dutt heel-turn-Lethal-tension-payoff-match will surely be excellent.

I hope "Consequences" Creed comes back too, even if they've missed the chance of the awesome "Truth and Consequences" team.

Does anyone know what the plan for Daniels actually is? Some kind of surprise return and final win over Senshi for his right to be employed seems almost logical, so i guess it'll be nothing like that.

So the X -Div at least has potential. The only thing i'm really bored of in TNA is Black Reign, but even there the "Dustin Rhodes doesn't know why Kaz hates him" thing is almost stupid enough to make it not terrible. As long as Kaz never loses, cos he was doing quite well for himself before being dragged into this.



How do you learn to fall off a twenty foot ladder?
hansen9j
Andouille








Since: 7.11.02
From: Riderville, SK

Since last post: 3 days
Last activity: 19 hours
#8 Posted on | Instant Rating: 9.00
    Originally posted by 2P4E
    I hope "Consequences" Creed comes back too, even if they've missed the chance of the awesome "Truth and Consequences" team.


I'm looking forward to Creed, appearing if only because the announcing team will not mention anything about Team Pacman, but will still act as if everyone should know who Creed is.



A Knight of Prosperity... cajun style.

Word Up, Thome
Quezzy
Knackwurst








Since: 6.1.02
From: Pittsburgh, PA

Since last post: 1 hour
Last activity: 1 hour
#9 Posted on | Instant Rating: 5.19
    Originally posted by 2P4E
    Does anyone know what the plan for Daniels actually is? Some kind of surprise return and final win over Senshi for his right to be employed seems almost logical, so i guess it'll be nothing like that.



Only heard rumors because I don't think anybody knows what TNA is doing, including themselves, but the rumor I heard is that Daniels will actually be gone for at least a few months wrestling in the Indys to make it look like TNA really fired him. I don't know how much longer Senshi has to finish his contract but I imagine he could be long gone by the time Daniels comes back.




Lance's Response:

THAT IS AWESOME!
Cerebus
Scrapple








Since: 17.11.02

Since last post: 3 days
Last activity: 8 hours
#10 Posted on | Instant Rating: 1.48
If this were the WWE, Senshi would be trying to run through imaginary holes in the wall. Instead, TNA is treating him rather well jobbing him out in decent matches. I will not be surprised to see him back later on down the line.

The AJ stuff was pretty funny. Nice to see that a guy who just a year ago was the top guy in the company having to still live at home with his parents.

The Tomko bit with Kurt Angle was also really good. Tomko continues to get better and better every week. I'd almost like to see him get a title run, but he's not quite to that point yet. Maybe in six months or so.



Forget it Josh... it's Cerebustown.
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I still stand by my opinion from the first two weeks that Barrett is the one to watch here. I can see him sticking with Jericho even after all this is done, they've got a good thing going. The less of Sheffield I see, the better.
- GameCrazy, WWE NXT #3 3-9-10 (2010)
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