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19.4.14 0018
The W - Pro Wrestling - I had everything I ever wanted.... an essay
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asteroidboy
Andouille








Since: 22.1.02
From: Texas

Since last post: 1242 days
Last activity: 150 days
#1 Posted on | Instant Rating: 4.95

(note - I freely admit that I stole this idea, reading this thread (The W)




X-Pac, I'm sorry.

I'm sorry for every time I laughed when Booker T called you a "ratty little sucka."
I'm sorry for every message board post when I characterized a crowd reaction as X-Pac-style, "go-away heat."

I've made some mistakes. But, as a fan, I wish you would take me back. We've had some good times together, you and I.

I remember seeing you as the Lightning Kid in some federation that I don't remember and thinking, "Wow, he's skinny and has bad acne. Maybe I can be a wrestler too!"

I kinda stopped watching wrestling after that. When I flipped it on again, you were leading a group of guys that burned up second segments of RAW for months.

Your entrance music was cool, even if it was by Uncle Kracker. It gave me something to bellow when I was out drunk with my friends at the bar. I guess you would have wanted it that way.

But besides that, your stable of misfits' successes were precious few. I think Albert had the Intercontinental title and you had the Light Heavyweight belt at the same time. One time you guys made me laugh, when you played straight men to Kurt Angle during one skit when he said, "You X-factor guys are pretty cool!"

And then, things started to go downhill. You were the only WWF member to get booed against the Alliance. I didn't mean it, X-Pac.

At least you hated Hulk Hogan, even if I didn't understand that joke you made about him when you returned to RAW in 98. Later, you returned to the NWO and hit him in the head with a chair. That was something.

I laughed when, during the final days, you'd be walking off from some NWO beatdown and you'd inexplicably do the double biceps pose.

I turned on you. We all did. Somebody posted that you're like the guy who drives around with glasspacks on his truck, late at night. And I guess you are, and I hated you for it. I laughed along with that guy who made the "Thank God X-Pac's gone" sign. But now, I realize that I was wrong.

After the WWF fired you, you seemed to go through a hard time. I remember reading your Kinko's press release about the split with Chyna. I'm no relationship therapist, but I agreed that you didn't seem out of line.

"I placed my right foot into her chest & shoved her back to the ground again. A true kick to the body would have sent her to the hospital ."

And..

"I wrapped her in a rear naked choke (My legs wrapped around her waist) She has turned this into me trying to snap her neck. Never did I cut off her wind pipe."

Well, things happen. But it's the little updates that make me nostalgic for the old times. Hearing that you were in NWA:TNA, with some bastardized nickname, winning the X title. Or that time my friend said he saw you and Chyna on the Anna Nicole Smith show, and she said, "Oh look, it's Joanie and her cute boyfriend!"

Or tidbits like from your website, announcing that the restraining order case against you has been dismissed. It's great to hear that you've bounced back. I guess there's no place anymore for me and your other fans.

Sometimes I think it's for the best. Wrestling's not as fun. I guess I didn't know what a good thing I truly had. I know sometimes I hold back my emotions, but this is the only way I have to show you how I feel.

I'm sorry, X-Pac. I'd say that I'll try to be a better fan, but maybe you're better off without me.


(edited by asteroidboy on 22.3.04 0127)


-- Asteroid Boy


Wiener of the day: 23.7.02, 3.12.03

"In addition, my tickets weren’t really what you’d expect from the webmaster of the internet’s largest independent pro-wrestling website." - Widro

"My brother saw the Undertaker walking through an airport." - Rex
"Was he no-selling?" - Me


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wordlife
Head cheese








Since: 4.4.03

Since last post: 3174 days
Last activity: 2458 days
#2 Posted on | Instant Rating: 10.00
This is arguably one of the funniest things I have ever read....you should ask Barbwire Mike to put together something for Xpac like he did for Kevin Nash...the song "It's a long way down" would be good

I would pay to listen to some dude at a bar bellowing out "I know you hate the X-Factor but you ain't gonna look at me like that"..then run up to some random girl and say "So what you lookin at?"



"I'm not that big, but I'm fast, I'm pretty sure I can outrun the whole Dallas Cowboys team."
--high school senior RB (and possible future Boomer Sooner) Adrian Peterson on his thoughts on his chances in the NFL

Am I the only person who hope this kid signs into the NFL and Roy Williams and Parcells get to let that comment stew for the next 7 months?
uberlou
Merguez








Since: 26.3.03
From: Glendale, Cali

Since last post: 1430 days
Last activity: 1201 days
AIM:  
#3 Posted on | Instant Rating: 6.64
Sir, you get a 10 from me for that excellent piece of work. That was HI-LARIOUS! Well done.



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Maybe it was just me, but when Bischoff killed the IC title there seemed to be some sort of "vibe" that it might be back via some kind of angle. Had anyone else heard this, or seen some kind of posting about it elsewhere on the net?
- cranlsn, IC Title storyline??? (2002)
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