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The W - Random - How to change a light bulb
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Post (9 total)

Since: 25.6.02
From: Ottawa

Since last post: 1224 days
Last activity: 837 days
#1 Posted on | Instant Rating: 6.21
so true....even on this board...

How many message board members does it take to change a lightbulb?
Answer: 422

1 to change the lightbulb and post it to the board that the bulb has

14 to respond and share similar experiences.

7 to caution about the dangers of changing lightbulbs.

27 to point out spelling errors & grammatical errors in postings about
changing lightbulbs.

53 to flame the spell-checkers.

156 to write the administrator complaining about the lightbulb
discussion &
its inappropriateness to the board.

111 to defend the relevance of the lightbulb discussion.

27 to post website addresses where one can see different examples of

14 to complain that the website addresses are incorrect and post correct

12 to "leave the board forever" because they can't handle the lightbulb

"You know the world is going crazy when the best rapper is a white guy, the best golfer is a black guy, the tallest guy in the NBA is Chinese, the Swiss hold the America's Cup, France is accusing the U.S. of arrogance, Germany doesn't want to go to war, and the three most powerful men in America are named 'Bush', 'Dick', and 'Colon.
Need I say more?"

Chris Rock
Promote this thread!

Since: 2.1.02
From: The Las Vegas of Canada

Since last post: 28 days
Last activity: 7 hours
#2 Posted on
This does not however take into account the 34 posts on this board regarding whether or not HHH is holding the light bulb down by forcing it to be changed.

and maybe I should open up my sensitive side/but really, the sensitive side sucks./I've been there./You can only imagine the kinds of sweaters they make you wear.
Peter The Hegemon
Lap cheong

Since: 11.2.03
From: Hackettstown, NJ

Since last post: 10 days
Last activity: 5 hours
#3 Posted on
How many surrealists does it take to screw in a lightbulb?


Since: 28.4.02
From: Pittsburgh, PA

Since last post: 7 days
Last activity: 7 days
#4 Posted on
How many Republicans does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

None, Republicans only screw the poor.


How many Jewish mothers does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

Don't bother with me. I'll just sit here alone in the dark.


How many Conservative Economists does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

There's no need - the bulb's repairing itself. Look, it's getting brighter! I swear!


How many paranoids does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

Who wants to know?!

Shot in the dark

Since: 11.1.02
From: Houston

Since last post: 122 days
Last activity: 122 days
#5 Posted on

    Originally posted by Socks
    27 to point out spelling errors & grammatical errors in postings about
    changing lightbulbs.

Save me a spot in this group...

You kids like the rock 'n roll music? Then here's Matthew Good.
The Thrill

Since: 16.4.02
From: Green Bay, WI

Since last post: 592 days
Last activity: 438 days
#6 Posted on

"America may have some problems, but it's our home. Our team. And if you don't wanna root for your team...then you should get the hell out of the stadium. Go America." --Stan Marsh, South Park

Forgive me, fellow Wieners, I know not what I do...

How many Packer fans does it take to change a light bulb?
Four. One to change the bulb; three to talk about how good the old bulb was.

How many Bears fans does it take to change a light bulb?
Five. One to hold the bulb, four to turn the ladder.

Star wipe, and...we're out.
Thrillin' ain't easy.

ACW-NWA Wisconsin Home Video Technical Director...& A2NWO 4 Life!

All-Star Championship a proud member of the NWA!

"And on the seventh day I created the Gobbledeegooker because fuck you guys." --Notorious F.A.B. on a Vince biography

Karlos the Jackal
Lap cheong

Since: 2.1.02
From: The City of Subdued Excitement

Since last post: 162 days
Last activity: 13 hours
#7 Posted on
My favorite:

How many Frat Boys does it take to screw in a light bulb?

None. Frat Boys don't screw in light bulbs -- they screw in pools of their own vomit.

And my girlfriend's favorite:

How many Feminists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

That's not funny.


Since: 20.6.02

Since last post: 273 days
Last activity: 267 days
#8 Posted on
Q: How many lesbians does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

A: One, but it takes an expert group of doctors and gynecologists to screw it back out.


Q: How many Ellen Degeneres's does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

A: One, but you gotta wait a year for her to get it out of the closet.


Q: How many Irishmen does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

A: Six. One to hold the lightbulb in, and five to drink so much the room starts spinning.

Steven + Faith: Three months of happiness, and a controlling, emotionally manipulative, and psycho sister. Not Faith...Faith's sister. Don't ask. PLEASE don't ask...
Big Bad

Since: 4.1.02
From: Dorchester, Ontario

Since last post: 3 days
Last activity: 4 hours
#9 Posted on | Instant Rating: 5.54
Here's one that's a bit lost in the era of the Fleet Centre, but it's still funny.

Q: How many Boston Bruins fans does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

A: Yeah right, like they ever change a lightbulb in the Garden.

Over 1600 posts and still never a Wiener of the Day!

Q: If you could have one superpower -- the strength of 100 men, invisibility, or the ability to fly -- which would you choose and why?

Michael Vick: Oh man, invisibility. If I was in a bad situation or something or I said something or you know, caught with two girls I could just disappear. I could be gone just like that -- no trouble.

"I don't understand the creative process. Actually, I make a concerted effort not to understand it. I don't know what it is or how it works but I am terrified that one green morning it will decide not to work anymore, so I have always given it as wide a bypass as possible."-- William Goldman

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I found it through a friend whose aunt lives in the building. So it wasn't him that did me the favor of telling the landlord about me (shouldn't all supers tell the landlord of everyone interested in the apt as long as they're not visibly insane?)
- kickballqueen305, Tipping the building super (2003)
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