I cannot tell you how good it felt to sit back, hide all of my writing implements and actually WATCH Raw. It felt so good, I just might do it next week too. Well, it seems we've got ourselves a PPV coming up, and I figured I'd jump the bell so to speak and lodge my predictions before the rest of the Weinerworld. Here we go.
WORLD HEAVYWEIGHT CHAMPIONSHIP
Triple H (Challenger) (Heads) vs. Shawn Michaels (Champion) (Tails)
First Fall: Methinks they're going to do this the same way as NWO 2001, with Tripps losing one and taking the next two.
I say: Shawn Michaels My shiny Sacagewhosit coin says: Shawn Michaels
Second Fall: Ooh, they busted out the cage one fall early. Big deal. Tripps takes this one.
I say: Triple H Coin says: Triple H
Third Fall: There is absolutely no way that Shawn Michaels is walking out of here the World Heavyweight Champion.
Kurt Angle (Challenger) (Heads) vs. The Big Show (Champion) (Tails)
I have a very uneasy feeling about this one. A Brock turn is not entirely out of the question, so I'll give the nod to TBS here.
I say: The Big Show Coin says: Kurt Angle
WORLD TAG TEAM CHAMPIONSHIP
The Dudley Boyz (Challengers) (Heads, Heads) vs. Booker T & Goldust (Challengers) (Tails, Tails) vs. Lance Storm & William Regal (Challengers) (Heads, Tails) vs. Chris Jericho & Christian (Champions) (Tails, Heads)
Once again, there is no way that the champs retain. I think Regal & Storm are going to be shoved down our collective throats some more, with Regal punting somebody (probably Jericho) for the win.
I say: Lance Storm & William Regal Coin says: Booker T & Goldust
Trish Stratus (Challenger) (Heads, Heads) vs. Jacqueline (Challenger) (Tails, Tails) vs. Victoria (Champion) (Heads, Tails)
Jackie is in this match because WWE went to Texas and Jackie didn't lose. Big freaking deal. She beat the dominant champion in the center of the ring with a freaking spinning heel kick! How does this make the champ look? How does this make Trish look? I don't care about this match, I'll say champ retains just because someone has to.
I say: Victoria Coin says: No Contest (landed Tails, Heads)
Wow, that's it? No, wait a sec. We've got late-breaking (thrown together) matches.
WWE CRUISERWEIGHT CHAMPIONSHIP
Chavo Guerrero (Challenger) (Heads) vs. Billy Kidman (Champion) (Tails)
Why, again, is one half of the tag champinos facing the Cruiserweight champion? Billy retains.
I say: Billy Kidman Coin says: Chavo Guerrero
Kane (Heads) vs. Batista (Tails)
They have seriously botched this monster push for Batista, so don't expect a clean win here. Flair might get involved, but methinks it shan't be enough.
I say: Kane Coin says: Batista
Chris Benoit (Heads) vs. Eddie Guerrero (Tails)
It's nice that they're having this match, but why exactly aren't they playing up the feud a little more? These guys have been closely-related ever since the Radicals debuted, and now they're blowing it off for nothing. Actually, I think that this match will end with some form of a screwjob, leading to a gimmick match at RR.
I say: Eddie Guerrero Coin says: Eddie Guerrero
That, incidentally, is the first time the coin and I have agreed. Watch Benoit win just to prove both of us wrong.
Edge (Heads) vs. A-Train (Tails)
Allow me to jump on the I Hate Albert No Matter What Stupid Name They Give Him bandwagon. I guess Test really was the strength of T&A. This guy has no charisma and is forced to rely on back hair for heat. It's a damn shame they couldn't have found something decent for Edge to do. That being said, if they're going to shove him down our throats, they might as well do it right.
I say: A-Train Coin says: Edge
Is that it? I think that's it. Hmm. Column seems short to me. That's probably because it is short. What can I do to flesh it out? Inane bullet points? Ramblings about Raw Deal? Inane bullet-pointed Raw Deal ramblings? Repeating the words "Screw Flanders" over and over? Crud. Ah, well. I've got it! I'll introduce a columnly segment, called Raw Deal Ramblings! It's brilliant! Either that or it'll flop. Only one way to see.
So, what's new in the world of Raw Deal? Not much, actually. I bought one of my local hobby shops' entire stock of Raw Deal yesterday. Yup, those two starters set me back about 10 bucks. Great deal. I'm pretty sure that I'll be going to a tournament up in Gardner Sunday. Word on the street is that they're letting the players watch the PPV free of charge, so I might just find a way to watch it. No, I won't recap it, and don't ask again. With the Raw Deal world champion probably being there (seeing as how it's at his home store), who knows? Maybe everyone's least favorite columnist could score an upset. I've pretty much broadcasted the fact that I'm playing Kurt Angle to the world, so maybe next month I'll build something else. Suggestions appreciated. Any and all RD questions can be posted here, PM'd to me, e-mailed (email@example.com), pretty much any way you think works.
On the wrestling video game front, there is even less going on than with Raw Deal. SmackDown! Shut Your Mouth is a definite probably for the holidays, and I am not one to pass up an opportunity to grant the Undisputed King of the World a shot at Brock's Undisputed Title. Look out Lesnar, Y2J's coming at ya!
Does that sound as corny as I think it does? Anyway, I'm fresh ut of ideas to rant on this week; be back soon with whatever strikes my fancy.
EDIT: Oh, crap. Stupid Nowinski/Maven match. Well, here we go.
Christopher Nowinski (Heads) vs. Maven (Tails)
I see no reason not to continue this feud, possibly with a much-anticipated Al Snow heel turn. I've never seen Snow work as a heel and I think it could be fun to watch.
I say: Christopher Nowinski The same coin that just so happened to be in my pocket right now says: Christopher Nowinski
Well, unless we get ANOTHER last minute matchup, that's it for my Armageddon predictions. Next column's topics include how I did in Gardner, why Triple H winning the World Title might have been a good thing, and the stupidity of solid gold dollar coins.
(edited by gugs on 14.12.02 1220) Why do I watch? Because every episode has the potential to be the best one ever, and I'll be DAMNED if I'm gonna miss that one after sitting through this shit.
Meh, "World Champ Mike Canu" isn't all he's cracked up to be. My friend James went undefeated against him at Origins and I'm not sure if they played at Gen Con. I played him once in sealed deck and only lost to EXTREMELY bad draws on my part and insanely good draws on his...
I don't know; in order to be the World Champion, you either have to be really good...or you have to do the boss. The guy in charge of Raw Deal is a large heterosexual man from Connecticut. Methinks Mike Canu's none too shabby.
Why do I watch? Because every episode has the potential to be the best one ever, and I'll be DAMNED if I'm gonna miss that one after sitting through this shit.
Wowzers, where did you get the coin man? It's predictions were pretty much bang on after its initial schoolboy error of taking HHH to lose at a second straight ppv (duh). Man I could have done with currency like that when I was doing my nfl predictions at the start of the year
"I tear my quadricep all the time. Heck I tore it this morning and I'm fine!" Kurt Angle
To make up for missing two Mondays in a row, and in part because I've long ago given up the hope of seeing Austin, Goldberg and Kane in the same ring at the same time, I'm releasing this never before seen RAW Satire Concert Recap.