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The W - Movies & TV - Games of Thrones 2x4 - "Garden of Bones"
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John Orquiola
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Since: 28.2.02
From: Boston

Since last post: 64 days
Last activity: 64 days
#1 Posted on | Instant Rating: 6.16
"There's no cure for being a cunt." - Bronn, re: Joffrey

Certainly not, in King Joffrey's case. We'll get to that in a bit.

For what comes out from between Melisandre's legs is dark and full of terrors. That ending was all kinds of messed up. I mean, that moment - Melisandre giving "birth" to that black, shadow thing - was incredibly messed up in the book, but to see it on television is something else. I think that topped Mae Young giving birth to a hand and Stacy Kiebler giving birth to photos of Shawn Stasiak. But Melisandre finally called Davos the Onion Knight.

Also messed up was Littlefinger making a play for Catelyn in her tent. "It seems we've been given a second chance!" Amazing. That man has no shame. He's one of the people directly responsible for Ned Stark's death by betraying him, then he tries to come onto his wife, then he presents her with Ned's bones. Plus lies right to her face that the Lannisters have both Sansa and Arya to trade.

I also really liked the banter between the two Lannister soldiers discussing the Mountain Gregor Clegane and then revealing that it's common knowledge in the realm that Renly Baratheon is gay and Loras Tyrell "has been stabbing him for years and he's not dead." Then Grey Wind ate their entrails. Dire wolves must not like fart jokes either.

I have to say, the woman performing battlefield amputations Robb Stark met totally threw me. Because it seems like this is going to be his love interest (even though he is promised to marry one of Walder Frey's daughters as a condition of letting Robb's army cross the Twins last season), but her name is totally different from the woman in the books.

Meanwhile, I believe this week marks the first appearance of Roose Bolton, Lord of the Dreadfort, whom Robb was speaking to while surveying the Lannister dead on the battlefield. He's important, or will be, and I fucking hate him. And he's not even the worst person named "Bolton" who will appear in this series.

The less than brotherly failed negotiations between Renly and Stannis was one of my favorite scenes in the book and it was also great on the show. The Baratheon brothers, including Robert, are an interesting study because they are all completely different kinds of people. You'd never know they were brothers by their character and behavior.

"A good act does not wash out the bad, nor a bad the good." Also, Davos, it's "fewer" fingers, not "less" fingers. Stannis Baratheon, king of grammar, if nothing else.

Tyrion had two great moments: rescuing Sansa and then completely cutting off Lancel Lannister's balls, such as they are. Lancel - not exactly one of the shining lights of the Lannister family.

Across the Narrow Sea, Daenerys finally got a great moment this season and it was my favorite bit of the episode. Starved and desperate, with only one bargaining chip but suspecting (rightly) that as soon as she shows The Thirteen of Qarth her dragons, they'd take them from her, she still threatens them with death by dragonfire unless they let her Kahlazar in the gates. "You are a true Targaryen!" She sure is. Great to see Xaro Xhoan Daxos too.

Qarth was awesome. "Greatest city there ever was or will be" indeed. It sure looks it. That's the first city this show has shown that I'd actually want to live in. I can say the exact opposite of Harrenhal, the worst castle in Westeros, and that's saying something.

Tywin Lannister is no fool, and not a fan of the old rat in the bucket gnawing through your chest game. He took one look at Arya/Arry and deduced she was a girl disguised as a boy. Loved Arya's prayer: Cercei. Illyn Payne. The Hound. Joffrey. A list of no one's favorite people.

All right, Joffrey. Joffrey and his damned crossbow and his penchant for having Sansa publicly beaten. Poor Sansa. "Garden of Bones" gave us a disturbing look at what Joffrey actually finds exciting, and it's not sex, or whores, or whores having sex. He gets off on sheer brutality because he absolutely hates women. It's been strongly hinted but he's really a monster. One thing about that King Joffrey Baratheon - he's horrible to the whores. He could learn a lot from his uncle. But that's not likely.

(edited by John Orquiola on 23.4.12 1247)

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Since: 4.11.02
From: Winchester, VA

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#2 Posted on | Instant Rating: 8.47
Amazing episode.

I loved the actor playing Roose. He was quiet and terrifying just as he is in the books.

Littlefinger was sooo good in his sleaziness. That was a play that Tommy Carcetti would have proud of.

Arya's prayer gave me chills. I've heard it so much in the book that I've basically memorized it. With Arya becoming Tywin's cupbearer does that mean she won't work in the kitchen with Wease? That might alter some stuff later.

Amazing how a hot rat eating through your chest isn't the most awful thing in the episode. Melissandre's shadow baby was absolutely one of the most horrifying things I've ever seen on tv. I cannot believe they showed it in such detail. This is one of the reasons why I love the books (and the show). Every time you think "oh, things can't get any worse than that" you are wrong.

That Joff. He's a charmer. I wish Dexter Morgan could pay him a visit.



Am I in Horseville? Because I'm hearing nothing but naysayers!
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Since: 2.6.03
From: Detroit area

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#3 Posted on | Instant Rating: 2.00
I've had multiple friends confusing Lancel Lannister for Loras Tyrell because the actors are both blonde(ish). Remember, Lancel = cup bearing, cousin banger, Loras = chest shaver. That clears it up.

Giving birth to a black shadow is so freaking \m/
dMp
Banger








Since: 4.1.02
From: The Hague, Netherlands (Europe)

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#4 Posted on | Instant Rating: 7.89
When she gave birth, I was like "that's it? Some smokey discharge coming out of he---oooh shit. Is that a claw forming?"
And the Onion knight had to watch it from up close. Poor guy.

Again I loved hearing Arya's prayer. So important to her development.

And I cheered a bit when Qarth opened its gates.
Daeny's story should be picking up again soon.

Overall, another great episode. I am enjoying the pacing of this season as there is hardly a moment that isn't enjoyable (in my mind season 1 was a bit slower/random talking)
Maybe it's simply because now the chess pieces are already in place and they're all making their moves.




Avatar Mud
Mr Shh
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Since: 9.1.02
From: Bergen County, NJ

Since last post: 4 days
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#5 Posted on | Instant Rating: 7.32
I love how, in an episode full of totally effed up shit, Arya's prayer stands out as one of the strongest and most memorable moments. In fact, maybe my favorite moment of the whole episode is when she added Polliver to the list. That was chilling. Her own Kill Bill revenge list (Off Joff?).



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John Orquiola
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Since: 28.2.02
From: Boston

Since last post: 64 days
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#6 Posted on | Instant Rating: 6.16
Turns out the actress who plays Shae was in porn. (business.avn.com) Sadly, she remains estranged from her parents.

Season 2 is doing a remarkable job streamlining the more unwieldy events and George RR Martin plotting of the book. For instance, Daenerys spends a lot of time in the book wandering the deserts, and Arya spends a lot of time in the book lost in the wilderness.


Spoiler Below: Highlight text to read
If I recall correctky, the black, smoke monster Melisandre gives birth to kills the sitting lord of Storm's End and then she does it a second time to go after Renly in the book. Pretty sure only Renly is the target in next week's episode.


The show's efficient plotting cuts out the excess and gets right to it. Maybe in Arya's case, the show can even improve on some of the less than satisfactory directions her story takes in the book(s). Seems like they've already begun --> Arya becomes Tywin's new cupbearer.

(edited by John Orquiola on 23.4.12 1410)

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Since: 24.2.03
From: Toronto, Canada

Since last post: 12 days
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#7 Posted on | Instant Rating: 2.76
As long as we still get some weasel soup.
lotjx
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Since: 5.9.08

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#8 Posted on | Instant Rating: 1.17
It does seem like they are hitting the fast forward button on Arya and Danny. Which is a good thing. I was going to ask about the black smoke baby, because I forgot about it, so thanks for Johnny O for reading my mind. I can't wait to see how they are going to move John's story with all the time he spends in the woods.



The Wee Baby Sheamus.Twitter: @realjoecarfley its a bit more toned down there. A bit.
MoeGates
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Since: 6.1.02
From: Brooklyn, NY

Since last post: 12 days
Last activity: 17 hours
#9 Posted on
I was a little surprised Roose Bolton made an appearance to talk about flaying.

Spoiler Below: Highlight text to read
My theory has been that Theon will be the character that dies in the TV who doesn't in the books, as he's essentially written out at the end of Clash of Kings, disappearing for two books only to re-emerging as a torture-porn sideshow in Dance with Dragons. But maybe they're setting something up with that.






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Scottyflamingo
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Since: 23.6.10
From: Auburn, AL

Since last post: 409 days
Last activity: 138 days
#10 Posted on | Instant Rating: 2.43
-Ok, who is Illyn Payne? I know the others in the prayer.

-I disagree with Orq...the Hound is one of my favorite characters. Hated him at first, but he redeemed himself with his challenge to his brother and sympathy for Sansa.

-The prayer. This is totally Arya's "My name is Indigo Montoya, you killed my father" and is equally awesome.

-Joffrey is a full blown sociopath. My friend is debating me about the fate of the whore. He says she was raped with the staff, but I say she was just beaten and branded.

-I love Tywin. I love how you think he must be a monster since most of his brood are scumbags and he turns out to have a great deal of nobility and honor. I see where Tyreien gets it.

-Littlefinger continues becoming a bigger heel each week.

-When dragon babies get grown, it's gonna go down.

John Orquiola
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Since: 28.2.02
From: Boston

Since last post: 64 days
Last activity: 64 days
#11 Posted on | Instant Rating: 6.16
Illyn Payne is the King's Justice, i.e. headsman or executioner. He was the one who actually did the Ned Stark decapitating with Ned's own sword Ice.



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samoflange
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Since: 22.2.04
From: Cambridge, MA

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#12 Posted on | Instant Rating: 3.96
    Originally posted by Scottyflamingo
    -When dragon babies get grown, it's gonna go down.


About these dragon babies, do they grow up and become a force relatively soon? I expect that this show will keep the pace and do one book per season. How many years until we get some legit dragon action in a mainstream fantasy TV show?

If anyone answers this, please use spoiler tags obviously.
CruelAngel777
Frankfurter








Since: 7.4.02

Since last post: 14 days
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#13 Posted on | Instant Rating: 3.95
I loved Daenerys trying to force down her pride in the Garden of Bones. She was smart enough to know that as soon as she presented the dragons it would of literally been the end of her journey.

Man that guy she was arguing with looked like Pete Gas. Also anybody else watch Guy Ritchie's "RocknRolla"? The guy playing Xaro Xhoan Daxos (Where does Martin come up with these names?) was Think Tank in that film. I mainly remember him cause he had a dichotomy of high intelligence and fondness for the arts, but was a street thug with a surveillance van.

Bronn has been saying what I've been saying about cunts for years. The hetero man crush continues!
John Orquiola
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Since: 28.2.02
From: Boston

Since last post: 64 days
Last activity: 64 days
#14 Posted on | Instant Rating: 6.16
    Originally posted by samoflange
    About these dragon babies, do they grow up and become a force relatively soon? I expect that this show will keep the pace and do one book per season. How many years until we get some legit dragon action in a mainstream fantasy TV show?

    If anyone answers this, please use spoiler tags obviously.



Spoiler Below: Highlight text to read
The dragons grow relatively quickly in Westeros time. By book 5 (A Dance With Dragons) they are if not full grown, then big enough to ride and be a serious threat that can do serious damage. I think a couple of years at most pass between books 2-5. But since book 3 will take up seasons 3-4, the dragons shouldn't be full grown any time soon by our time.




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Since: 8.10.03
From: Columbia MO

Since last post: 423 days
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#15 Posted on | Instant Rating: 5.00
    Originally posted by John Orquiola
      Originally posted by samoflange
      About these dragon babies, do they grow up and become a force relatively soon? I expect that this show will keep the pace and do one book per season. How many years until we get some legit dragon action in a mainstream fantasy TV show?

      If anyone answers this, please use spoiler tags obviously.



    Spoiler Below: Highlight text to read
    The dragons grow relatively quickly in Westeros time. By book 5 (A Dance With Dragons) they are if not full grown, then big enough to ride and be a serious threat that can do serious damage. I think a couple of years at most pass between books 2-5. But since book 3 will take up seasons 3-4, the dragons shouldn't be full grown any time soon by our time.




Spoiler Below: Highlight text to read
They'll be big enough to melt some Astaporian slavers faces sometime next season I think though.
Cerebus
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Since: 17.11.02

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#16 Posted on | Instant Rating: 0.94
I hate Sansa. I find her very annoying and useless. I hate her more that Joffrey. I want to see her beaten by him as much as possible.

Black Smoke Baby. Really? When this show started, I was liking how this show was a 'fantasy' yet seemingly based in reality. Now we have dragons that I thought looked terribly cheap and a Black Smoke Baby? I'm kinda disappointed at where this is going. What's next... body switching? Zombies? I'd prefer none of this and just get back to the baby killing and incest.



Forget it Josh... it's Cerebustown.
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Since: 28.8.09

Since last post: 62 days
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#17 Posted on | Instant Rating: 5.64
    Originally posted by Cerebus
    I hate Sansa. I find her very annoying and useless. I hate her more that Joffrey. I want to see her beaten by him as much as possible.


I know you're just being Cerebus, but Jesus Christ.

The problem with Joffrey is that there are so many satisfying ways to kill him off that just doing one of them will be disappointing.
lotjx
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Since: 5.9.08

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#18 Posted on | Instant Rating: 1.17
    Originally posted by Cerebus
    I hate Sansa. I find her very annoying and useless. I hate her more that Joffrey. I want to see her beaten by him as much as possible.

    Black Smoke Baby. Really? When this show started, I was liking how this show was a 'fantasy' yet seemingly based in reality. Now we have dragons that I thought looked terribly cheap and a Black Smoke Baby? I'm kinda disappointed at where this is going. What's next... body switching? Zombies? I'd prefer none of this and just get back to the baby killing and incest.


Considering the first scene of this show was body switching Zombies, I don't know why you are surprised. While I agree Martin likes to have the show based on a form of reality ie everyone is an asshole with political agenda and medieval times were dirty while having large fantasy elements does make the books feel uneven. Again, I have to ask why you are surprised when the first scene was straight out of dark fairy tale. If you hated Sansa now then don't read the books. She is even more annoying. And no, she did not have that beating coming and yes, Joffrey is a cunt with Mommy issues.



The Wee Baby Sheamus.Twitter: @realjoecarfley its a bit more toned down there. A bit.
John Orquiola
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Since: 28.2.02
From: Boston

Since last post: 64 days
Last activity: 64 days
#19 Posted on | Instant Rating: 6.16
Perhaps the words of House W should be: "Don't Feed The Troll"



@CMPunk
“@ZackRyder: @CMPunk She played me bro” I got your back.
John Orquiola
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Since: 28.2.02
From: Boston

Since last post: 64 days
Last activity: 64 days
#20 Posted on | Instant Rating: 6.16
I can't express how delighted I am the history of Westeros is being taught in South Park Elementary:



I could teach this class better than Garrison.



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