Q'n'D -"Cowboy" James Storm d. Kazarian with the Last Call -Rob Van Dam d. Kenny King with the body scissor roll-up to retain the X Division Championship -Chavo Guerrero & Hernandez d. Joey Ryan & Matt Morgan by DQ after Morgan pulls out the referee to retain the TNA Tag Team Championships -Austin Aries d. Bully Ray with the Greco-Roman nutshot -Tara d. Mickie James with the Widow's Peak to retain the Knockouts Championship -Kurt Angle, Samoa Joe, Wes Brisco, and Garrett Bischoff d. Aces & Eights after Kurt pins a random masked guy with the Angle Slam -Christopher Daniels d. AJ Styles clean with the Styles Clash (You read that right) -Jeff Hardy d. Bobby Roode with the Twist of Fate to retain the TNA World Heavyweight Championship
I missed most of the opening hour for dinner, so here's what we had in very abbreviated form:
"COWBOY" JAMES STORM came out for an opening promo, going from #1 contender to not even booked for the PPV. Storm was disgusted by Bobby Roode hiring the Aces last Thursday, so he wants to whoop his ass. Instead, he got KAZARIAN, who derided him as a whiner and a drunk. Storm challenges him for a match right now, so that led to...
"COWBOY" JAMES STORM v. KAZARIAN I definitely missed this match, but it ended after about six minutes of action. Kaz wasn't able to get the Fade to Black and Storm swiftly finished him with the Last Call.
WINNER: James Storm - Just a way to get these guys on the show.
KENNY KING v. ROB VAN DAM: X DIVISION CHAMPIONSHIP MATCH This had the potential to be awesome, but from what I saw, it was NOT good at all. These two did not click. Finish came after Van Dam missed the 5-Star Frog Splash. King looked to finish with the Royal Flush, but Van Dam countered with the body scissors roll-up to retain.
WINNER: Rob Van Dam - Van Dam's getting worse and worse by the week.
JOEY RYAN & "THE BLUEPRINT" MATT MORGAN v. CHAVO GUERRERO & HERNANDEZ: TNA TAG TEAM CHAPIONSHIP MATCH This was a whole lot of Ryan bumping around, while Morgan looked really intimidating. We also got the big man face-off between Hernandez and Morgan. Champs looked to finish after Hernandez's NFL tackle set up the Frog Splash from Chavo. The pin looked academic until Morgan pulled out the ref for the DQ.
WINNERS BY DQ: Hernandez & Chavo Guerrero - Decent match.
Post-match, Morgan destroyed Chavo by running him into the post.
Ok, NOW I'm all the way back!
Backstage, Jeremy Borash talks to Austin Aries for a quick promo about our next match. Aries offers a lot of Hogan-isms.
AUSTIN ARIES v. BULLY RAY Boy, I picked a great time to come back. Ok, let's hope a good match can at least salvage this turd of an angle.
Aries stalls to start. Ray eventually gets Aries in and starts hammering on him with power offense. Here's a BIIIIIIG back body drop! Aries tries for the sunset flip and gets a double choke for his troubles. Ray's corner charge eats elbow and Aries hits a second-rope dropkick. Hangman's neckbreaker gets 2. Aries tries to keep the heat on, as we get dueling chants from the crowd. Aries beats on Ray some more and mocks Hulk Hogan. Here's a Hogan legdrop for 1! HA! Ray comes back with chops and a big chop leads to a 360 oversell. Ray makes the babyface comeback with the military press drop and the gorilla press for 2! Corner charge misses, but Aries' corner charge is caught and he gets hotshotted into the turnbuckle. Ray gets caught on the second-rope, but the superplex attempt is blocked. Ray hits a second-rope seated dropkick (!) getting an awful lot of air for him! That was something else! That gets a "Holy shit!" chant going! Aries is able to send Ray to the outside and that sets up the suicide dive, which hits Ray's boot! MOOOOOO!!! It gets 2! Bully Bomb is turned into a crucifix drop and Aries puts Ray down with a kick to the chest. Running corner dropkick hits! Brainbuster is blocked when Ray launches Aries into the Bully Cutter! It gets 2 when Aries gets his foot on the ropes! Aries slips to the outside. Crowd chants for tables, as Ray walks into a drop toehold onto the steel steps! Ray's busted open, as Aries launches him with a flying elbow to the back. Aries goes to the mounted punches. Now here's BROOKE HOGAN, because FUCK ME, if this angle isn't about to take over a perfectly good match. Brooke checks on Ray, so Aries pulls her into the ring. Aries gets in her face, which is REALLY absurd, given that Brooke's actually taller than him! Here's Ray to toss Aries out. And now HULK HOGAN is walking to the ring, as Ray checks on Brooke. Hogan gets in Ray's face, as Ray tells Hulk to get Brooke out of here. Hulk escorts Brooke out, as Aries comes back in with the Greco-Roman nutshot and rolls Ray up for the pin!
WINNER: Austin Aries - This was a really good match, but this angle is just pure death.
Post-match, Aries points to his noggin, because he's SMART!
Your hosts are Todd Keneley, Mike Tenay, and Taz. They kill a couple of minutes waxing poetic over this insipid angle some more.
Here's a video package for...awww shit, really? Velvet Sky is back to kill us all? (tm CRZ)
Backstage, Jeremy Borash talks to Tara and Jesse. Borash asks about Sky. Man, I can't wait to see those two wrestle right now! Oh wait, she's facing someone else?
MICKIE JAMES v. TARA (w/JESSE): KNOCKOUTS CHAMPIONSHIP MATCH Mickie's donning hillbilly overall garb and it's very unsexy. Tara grabs a headlock to start. Mickie comes back with some hair tosses. Tara tries to regroup with Jesse and gets rolled up for 2. Northern Lights suplex gets 2. Headscissors hits, but Tara blocks the Mickie-DT before Jesse saves her. Mickie dropkicks both Tara and Jesse and tosses Tara back in. Mickie gets distracted, allowing Tara to come back with a kick to the chest. Tara works over Mickie for a bit, as the announcers talk about Velvet Sky. Mickie rolls Tara up off the Widow's Peak, but Jesse's running distraction. Tara hits the Spider Web slam for 2! Let's hit the body scissors! Mickie makes the babyface comeback. Enziguiri leads to a double KO, as Taz says it looks like we're watching RVD/King again. I don't know if that's a compliment or not. Mickie tosses Tara, but Jesse catches her. Mickie takes out Tara with a THESZ PRESS FROM THE TOP TO THE OUTSIDE! But here's Jesse running interference again, which leads to the Widow's Peak to retain the title for Tara.
WINNER: Tara - I've seen a lot better from these two. And the conclusion was pretty obvious given that everyone's paying attention to Velvet Sky.
Backstage, Jeremy Borash talks to Bobby Roode about his business arrangement with the Aces. Roode dances around the question, before addressing it with "Money talks, bullshit walks."
Here's a video package on the Aces.
THE ACES & EIGHTS v. WES BRISCO, GARRETT BISCHOFF, SAMOA JOE & KURT ANGLE I still can't believe this company was dumb enough to take the belt off Joe to put it on fucking Devon. What are they thinking? And ohhhhh man, this match is going to UGGGGGGGGGGGLY! Let's get it over with.
Devon attacks Kurt from behind to start and taunts Joe. Corner charge eats elbow. Here's a suplex for 2. Joe tags in and Devon tags out. Joe and Doc go at it with Joe getting the better of that exchange. Avalanche/enziguiri combo hits. Here's the tag to Garrett Bischoff, who almost immediately gets his ass kicked, because he sucks. Here's a tag to Random Masked Guy #1, as Bischoff's able to get some offense in. The masked guy shows his awesome ability with some choking! Bischoff comes back with vanilla offense and tags out to Brisco, who double-team the guy. Here's a VERY UGLY POETRY IN MOTION that may or may not have made Jeff Hardy throw up in his mouth a little bit. Brisco with more ugly offense. Holy crap, this guy is NOT good. Joe thankfully tags in and shows everyone how it's done with a snapmare, chop, and kick to the chest. Kneedrop hits, as Joe clears out the heel corner. But now we have triple-teaming to take Joe down a notch. Now Devon takes over with his own crappy offense, but tags out to Doc, who hits a gorilla press for 2. The Aces all tee off on Joe for a bit before Doc hits the chinlock...in an 8-man tag. Come ON! If you're tired, TAG OUT! Devon tags in and gets some "You sold out!" chants before he hits the nerve pinch. Jeeeeeesus...it's an 8-man tag! Stop with the restholds! Random Masked Guy #1 tags back in and works over Joe in the corner. BORRRRRRRING! The masked guy's corner charge eats boot! Random Masked Guy #2 rushes in and Joe catches him with the uranage, slamming him onto the first masked guy! The hot tag is made to Kurt, who's a house of fire! And now we have a Pier 8! Doc hits the chokeslam on Kurt, but turns around to a Brisco top-rope crossbody! He's taken out by the first masked guy's big boot, who eats a DDT from Brisco! Devon disposes of Bischoff with the spinebuster, but Joe removes Devon. Joe destroys Devon with the suicide dive! Angle gets the anklelock on the second masked guy! Doc tries to come in with the ball-PEEN hammer, but Bischoff and Brisco take him out. And Kurt finishes the second masked guy with the Angle Slam!
WINNER: Bischoff, Brisco, Joe, and Angle - Oh, this lived up to hype. This match SUUUUUUUUCKED!
Post-match...NOTHING! You've gotta be kidding me. GO SOMEWHERE WITH THIS ANGLE ALREADY!!!
Jeremy Borash talks to AJ Styles. It's one last time, but Styles says the result will be the same and Styles will once again beat Christopher Daniels.
Here's a video package for Styles/Daniels.
CHRISTOPHER DANIELS v. "THE PHENOMENAL" AJ STYLES: PINFALLS & SUBMISSIONS ONLY Tenay reels off some research numbers, which reveal that Styles and Daniels have been in the same match 115 times! Open mouth, insert foot.
Wrestling sequence starts us off. Daniels grabs a wristlock, which Styles shifts into a chinlock. Both men continue with counters to establish how well they know each other. Both men run the ropes and Daniels wins the shoulderblock battle. Styles regroups on the outside, as Daniels dusts off his hands in the ring. Now Daniels wants a Test of Strength! Daniels gets a cheapshot in and grabs a headlock. More counters, leading to a short-arm clothesline from Styles. Here's the dropkick from Styles! Styles hits the corner clothesline. Time for the deathlock, as we're hitting all the notes from the Best of AJ Styles vs. Christopher Daniels DVD that I'm sure is being made somewhere. We go on the apron, as Styles hits a VERTICAL SUPLEX ONTO THE APRON! OUCH! Here's another battle on the other side of the apron, so Daniels one-ups AJ with a URANAGE ONTO THE APRON! Styles gets whipped into the steel steps, as Daniels positions them to the side. Daniels picks AJ up and drops him onto the steps! Back in the ring, Daniels hits backdrop and thrusts his crotch! Daniels tries for a Flair pin, but gets caught, so he opts for a chinlock, instead. Daniels slaps Styles around, which spurs Styles to try a comeback, to no avail. Daniels hits an Asai moonsault and shifts into a crossface before AJ grabs the ropes. Tilt-a-whirl slam gets 2. Now we hit the armbar. Styles fights up and we get a double KO spot, as AJ's busted open around the left eye. Daniels misses a corner charge and Styles tries to fight back, but eats a uranage. BEST MOONSAULT EVER~! attempt is faked, but Styles still makes the babyface comeback. Now Styles hits the Torture Rack into a tilt-a-whirl slam for 2! Styles Clash attempt is reversed, so AJ hits a tilt-a-whirl headscissors! Styles runs right into a Blue Thunder Bomb from Daniels for 2! Slingshot snapmare from the top gets 2! The fight moves to the corner, where Styles hits the backflip DDT for 2! Styles goes up top, but gets crotched. Top-rope superplex hits! Both men trade blows, with Styles winning the exchange, but Daniels hits an enziguiri! Styles staggers, but hits a discus clothesline! Daniels fights back up, so Styles puts him down with the Pele Kick and both men are down! Here's a kick to the chest from Styles! Styles wants the Styles Clash, but Daniels is dead weight. Styles Clash attempt is reversed into an Angel's Wings attempt, which leads to anothe round of reversals, leading to the Styles Clash! IT GETS 2!!! Now we shift to the corner, as Styles wants a SUPER STYLES CLASH! It's reversed into a 'rana from Daniels! And Daniels finishes with the DANIELS CLASH for the pin!
WINNER: Christopher Daniels - Oof! That's an emphatic loss for AJ! And you know that's going to lead to the big heel turn.
Your hosts are Todd Keneley, Mike Tenay, and Taz, who talk about the match we just saw and Styles' run of luck.
Here's a video package for Hardy/Roode set to "My Remedy" from Stevie Stone.
"THE IT FACTOR OF PROFESSIONAL WRESTLING" BOBBY ROODE v. "THE CHARISMATIC ENIGMA" JEFF HARDY: TNA WORLD HEAVYWEIGHT CHAMPIONSHIP MATCH Jeff looks like he came from a sci-fi convention, as he comes out wearing a metal ram helmet. With the helmet removed, Jeff's decked out in red and green face paint, making him look like some sort of Christmas Creature. Jeremy Borash gives us the championship intros.
With Roode being the awesome heel that he is, it means the Impact Zone is FIRMLY behind Jeff tonight! Roode taunts Jeff to start before beating him down. Jeff comes back with a few counters, including a head-scissors and backdrop. Inverted atomic drop hits, but Roode avoids the wishbone legdrop. Jeff catches Roode with a pescado! Jeff hits a snapmare and dropkick for 2, as announcers speculate that Jeff's still hurt from the Aces beatdown last Thursday. Dueling chants are up from the Impact Zone mutants, just to prove what I said earlier wrong. Roode comes back and dominates Jeff by tossing him into all corners. Roode works over Jeff with a vertical suplex and kneedrop for 2. Now we hit the chinlock. Roode stalls and taunts the crowd before leisurely beating Jeff down some more. Corner clothesline and Perfect snapmare hit for 2. Here's another chinlock. Both men trade blows and Jeff hits the whip into the corner, followed by the Russian legsweep and legdrop for 2. Jeff runs the ropes, but runs them so much that Roode's able to toss him out! Here's another chinlock before Roode shifts into a body scissors. Both men trade blows again and Jeff makes the babyface comeback. Wishbone legdrop and seated dropkick hit! Second-rope splash gets 2! Roode catapults Jeff into the corner, but Jeff turns that into the Whisper in the Wind for 2! Roode rolls up Jeff for 2, leading to the mule kick from Jeff. Falcon Arrow leads to a Vaderbomb for 2! Twist of Fate is blocked and Roode hits the Double A Spinebuster for 2! Roode wants the Payoff, but Jeff's dead weight. Jeff's able to get the Twist of Fate, but the impact knocks Roode to the outside! Jeff follows with a crossbody from the apron. Poetry in Motion on the guardrail completely misses and Jeff flies into the crowd! Yikes! Roode gets him back in the ring for a 2 count! Now Roode wants a superplex, but it's blocked! Jeff shoves him off! OFF COMES THE SHIRT! Swanton Bomb hits, but Jeff can't make the cover! Both men get up and ROODE HITS THE SPEAR! IT GETS 2!!! Roode motions to the camera, which is the signal for the ACES & EIGHTS to make their way out! The Aces stop short, though, which has Roode yelling at them! Roode turns around into the Twist of Fate and Jeff retains!
WINNER: Jeff Hardy - Good main event, but it feels like a bit of a subpar night for Roode, who was resting and playing to the crowd an awful lot.
Post-match, the Aces immediately hit the ring and beat the shit out of Jeff. So it looks like we're now firmly moving into Jeff Hardy: Company Savior, I guess. Powerbomb from Random Masked Guy #1. Roode yells at Bane, telling him that he paid them on Thursday. So the Aces beat the shit out of Roode. Here's a chokeslam from Doc! The Aces pose in the middle of the ring. Closing credits are up and we're out!
And we're officially back where we started with the Aces angle with absolutely no movement forward. The only difference is that now Jeff Hardy's the champion, instead of Austin Aries. I don't even need to mention how beyond sick I am of this whole thing and the more I get sick of it, the more it gets forced down my throat. I mean, it's been going for almost six months! What exactly have we learned, aside from Devon and Doc getting unmasked? And does Hulk Hogan even care about them anymore, anyway?
As for the PPV, the last two matches kept it from Worst of the Year ranks, but this was really not good. Aries/Ray had a chance to be awesome before that godawful Hogan angle single-handedly dragged it down. RVD/King and Tara/Mickie were both very disappointing and everything we expected to be crap (i.e. anything involving the Aces) ended up being crap.
I think the matches that was expected to be good to great meet it’s expectations at least the last two matches did. The rest of the PPV lived down to expectations or even disappointed
The crowd atmosphere more than anything hurt a great Styles-Daniels that told a very strong story and adds much intrigue to Styles story.
Roode Vs Hardy was really good as these two have great chemistry. The crowd was not very good as they were only into segments of the match. I was hoping Roode was gonna win and I wonder where he goes from here.
The booking of the Aces and Eights continues to mystify. These guys lose a mid-card match against a team with Brisco and Bischoff on it and then take out two main eventers to end the show. It is like they can’t decide whether to go all in with their push or not and here you are with a faction bereft of talent getting all this air time, but not really beating anyone. I say just team up Doc with Devon in the tag division and forget about the rest of the group.
Man that Kenny King-RVD match stunk to high heaven huh? RVD seems less motivated than ever. I for one can’t wait until his contract is up and hope he goes back to the WWE or retires.
Tara vs Mickie wasn’t their best showing, but not bad for what it was. I am saddened that it’s being just a set up for a eventual Velvet Sky title shot. Velvet is a great bitchy heel, but a awful wrestler and baby-face. I would turn Gail Kim and have her feud with Tara.
Aries and Ray did all they could to have a good match and work around the Hogan’s but the yellow goblins hurt the match IMO. I wish these guys wouldn’t be playing side characters to the Hogan’s when these guys should be battling for the world title.
The tag title match was meh I am sad to see this feud continue as I’d like to see Daniels and Kaz get the titles back. Joey Ryan’s TNA run has underwhelming and Matt Morgan is again stick in a tag team for some reason.
All in all, not a bad PPV with two tremendous matches that made it a worthy watch.
TNA needs to get the fuck out of Orlando. This was a perfect example of how those fucking idiots at the arena can completely ruin a good show. It's gotten to a point where I just can't watch TNA anymore because the audience has to inject themselves into the product. It's fucking terrible.
This show would have been a solid B but these assholes dragged the life out of it to a D. Fucking ridiculous.
The problem with moving out of Orlando is the cost. They really can't take their show on the round and expect sell outs. I have been to TNA house shows and in small venues it looks kinda ok, but stadiums, its barely a quarter filled. It will look bush league plus they are probably getting a good deal from Universal Park to stay there. Yes, the fans are trying to be the redneck version of ECW, but moving is not an option. They could go on the road more. Their international episodes are some of the best, but they can't be overseas every week.
The PPV was not even worth a thought from me on buying it. TNA seems to be stuck in this weird pattern of doing some good shows leading to BFG and then shitting out after BFG. Jeff being the champ for Aries to re-do Hogan Knows Best is probably the worst booking move of the decade. Aces and Eights needs to end. They refuse to reveal who Bane is and was Devon on this PPV or even Joe? Why did Joe eve lose if Devon wasn't even going to be on the show? It just doesn't make sense.
The Wee Baby Sheamus.Twitter: @realjoecarfley its a bit more toned down there. A bit.
This was an average PPV in every way, shape, and form. Watching the Packers game was more entertaining.
The Kaz/Storm opener felt like something I'd see at a house show. Both guys were decent on the mic, though. Neither guy was on the PPV, so I suppose the impromptu match was a way to get them both on the PPV. Not bad, but it was a house show opener. C.
King/RVD: It was OK. More watchable than most X-division matches I've seen lately. RVD going over was never in doubt. C.
Tag Title Match: It was alright; the theme of the night for me was "it was OK." I liked the DQ finish; this feud should probably continue to give both teams something to do. C+
Aries/Ray: Solid match for the most part. Not quite as good as their last encounter, but it did establish that Brooke and Ray are indeed an item. I had no problem with the finish, since this should probably roll over to Genesis. I'll give it a B.
Mickie/Tara: Not as good as their previous PPV matches together or the main event cage match they had, but it was serviceable. Perfectly Acceptable Wrestling. C+
8 Man Tag: Talk about an anti-swerve. The setup for this match made it appear that a heel turn and 6-on-2 beatdown would be imminent, and it didn't happen. So, in essence, nothing happened. Aces & Eights lose again. C+
Styles/Daniels: It was a solid match, but I just wasn't into it. It had some good spots in it, and the right guy went over here. Daniels needed to win one of AJ at some point; why not the "last" one? B/B+
Roode/Hardy: Perfectly Acceptable Wrestling in the main event, even though the outcome was really never in doubt. The post-match beatdown from Aces & Eights was the usual stuff from them, but does it really mean much at this point? They keep losing when it matters. This story is firmly stuck in neutral. I'll give it a B; it was alright.
All in all, this was a PPV that was skippable. Nothing major happened, no turns, no title changes.....nothing. Aces & Eights did what they've been doing for the past few PPVs. Aries and Roode cut solid promos, though. It reminded me of the incredibly average PPVs TNA put on in the spring. I'll give Final Resolution a C+, which is what I expected to give it in the preview. OK matches, but nothing to go out of the way to see. An average PPV if I ever saw one. At least the Packers won last night, so it wasn't all bad.
Strongly disliked hour 1, with its random Kaz/Storm (standard match between those two), its clunky, plodding RVD/King (just like most RVD title defenses these days), and its pointless tag titles match Hour 2 was better : Aries/Bully was solid (the Hogans involvement didn't exceed 30 secs or so, and Aries was dominant before and after it), the KOs match was more than decent (even though I really hope that they're going for Velvet as TNA management's pet, and Mickie slowly getting more and more bitter about it), and the big tag was okay (even though the lack of progression on the Aces front was disappointing ; and Brisco saving an Ace from a hammer strike wasn't nearly enough imo).
Hour 3 was good : AJ/Daniels worked wonders despite the mute crowd, and Roode/Hardy was solid, albeit predictable.
A very middle-of-the-road PPV, though, not really newsworthy or memorable. Neither a whimper, nor a bang, but something in between.
The nWo B-Team > Aces and Eights and it's not even close.
I've held off posting about TNA because I feel so poorly about the product right now. TNA was really on their way to building something pretty solid just months ago and all that goodwill is just gone. Summer love is great, but boy is it fleeting.
Oh. Heh, I thought you were going to ask for that old picture of Kane and X-Pac doing guest commentary. It was especially funny at the time, Kane wearing the headset and all, because this was back when he didn't actually talk. Man, I loved that.