I rode the C-train in Calgary, didn't pay my fare, got caught...and lost the payment information. I ended up getting arrested when getting a a criminal check done for a security license. Spent overnight in remand before getting out the next day.
Nope, but I've had a couple of tickets. Speed-erm, "failure to stay in established lane", not wearing a seatbelt (at least I wasn't driving at the time, I've worn it since) and two parking tickets. One was from the school for parking in a faculty lot (which was completely empty), so I used the ticket to extract some Ass Pennies-style revenge. Two more months and I can speed again... well, at least if I get a ticket, I won't be going to traffic skewl.
You wanted the best, you got... Out of Context Quote of the Week.
"...but that doesn't mean he can't relate an amusing anecdote about the Haiti Kid and one of the Frenchman's testicles." (Hogan's My Dad)
No, but if tickets count, then Mr. lead foot pleads no contest.
Actually, I have been successful in disputing more speeding tickets (4) than I have paid (2), but I have had more warnings (8) that have scared me to slow down for a while.
One of the tickets I got for was a $15 fee for "failing to follow a sign" which the officer gave me a break, he told me if I dispute it then he'll tell the judge the sign was "speed limit 35" when he clocked me running with the pack at 47. The speeding ticket would've cost me $75 and points on my license.
I've been successful in avoiding 3 tickets by telling the cop "I'm sorry, I wasn't paying attention, I haven't had any sleep in three weeks with the newborn baby." One of these was legit, the others were quick thinking.
Just one speeding ticket when I was 16, nothing since. I've received about five warnings though, one in Canada while I was driving at 4:30 am with just my parking lights on. For a cop pulling over idiot drivers (albeit with great vision!!) at 4:30 am, she was super nice. Just told me to turn on my damn lights and to have a nice day. And I did!
Another time I didn't turn on my lights until about three seconds after exiting a gas station and a cop pulled me over. He, however, proceeded to do everything but strip search me for cocaine. He kept asking questions about my possible possession of drugs or alcohol, wanted to search my car, and continually alluded to my driving while intoxicated. After a few tiring minutes, I finally said something to the effect of "look, if you want to give me a breathlyzer, then just do it." He didn't think I was being very helpful...but he let me go shortly thereafter. I would have done all the getting-his-name-reporting-him jazz, but I was 18 at the time and probably had no idea I could even do such a thing. Plus I figured he *could* technically give me a ticket, so I shouldn't get too wise on him.
The next night I saw the same cop while I was at work (baker at a donut shop...the stereotype is true). He casually walked in and nodded at me as he typically did. Either he didn't recognize me from our get together the night before, or it was water under the bridge for him. Probably the former.
No arrests, but I've had a few speeding/failure to stop tickets, and a TON of parking tickets.
I also used to get pulled over a lot when I was younger, here's the worst story:
I used to work nights in a shipping/receiving warehouse in a really nice part of town. One night, me & my buddy got off work around 2 or 3am and I gave him a ride home (I'm black & my co-worker is Mexican). On the way to his house, which was in a very bad part of town, I was stopped at an intersection and I saw a California Highway Patrol ("State Trooper", for the rest of you) car across the intersection from us. When the light turned green, I crossed the intersection & watched him in my side mirror make this crazy U-turn & pull us over.
I rolled my window down before he got out & walked to my car. When he got to us, he shined his flashlight right in my eyes (I hate that), pulled up the little lock/unlock stick thingy on my door, and opened it! He ordered us out of the car. At this point, I stopped paying attention to what his partner was doing with my friend on the other side of the car. He asked me for my license & registration and told me to follow him. As we were walking towards the back of my car, he started in with all of the "Where are you going? Why are you out so late? Who is he (my co-worker)? How do you know him?" questions. He told me to turn around and put my hands on the top of my car then he searched me very vigorously. He found a box cutter in my pocket and got all angry & started shouting in my face "WHAT THE FUCK IS THIS?? WHAT DO YOU NEED THIS FOR, HUH?!" I told him it was a box cutter and I used it to cut boxes at work (This was in 1998).
He gave me the boxcutter back & told me to wait where I was while he searched my car. I turned towards the sidewalk & saw my friend sitting on the sidewalk looking at me with a "Man, this is some bullshit right here" look on his face. While "my guy" was throwing all of the loose contents of my car into the wet muddy gutter, his partner walked up to me, grabbed my collar with both hands, and shouted "GET THE FUCK OUT OF THERE!" and pulled me out from in between my car & their car. Then he said "ARE YOU FUCKING CRAZY! YOU CANT BE STANDING THERE! WHAT IF SOME FUCKING DRUNK ASS MEXICAN SPED UP & CRASHED INTO MY CAR! YOU'D BE KILLED IMMEDIATELY! NOW SIT DOWN OVER THERE NEXT TO YOUR 'HOMEBOY'!" During his diatribe, I was afraid to look him in the eye, so I stared at his badge and realized that his name tag said "T. Valasquez", which I thought was interresting.
I sat down & watched them tear apart my car. They threw every piece of anything they found into the nasty gutter. My school backpack, some clothes, all of my cassette tapes, pens, papers, everything. When they were done, they chatted with each other for a minute or so then motioned us over to them. When we got there, the partner told my buddy to get back in the car, then he walked over to his car. Then "my guy" gave me my license & registration back and said "You guys be careful out here" and walked back to his car. I asked my buddy to come out & help me put all my crap back in my car. When we were finished, "my guy" walked over to me (they never left) and said "Your windshield is cracked and one of your tail lights is out. Be sure to take care of that". Then got back in his car & finally drove away.
When I first told my wife that story along with some of the others, she didnt believe that kind of thing still happened (she's white). That is until I was pulled over with her in the car a couple years ago and the cop asked me all of his crazy "Who is she? How do you know her? Where are you coming from? Do you have any outstanding warrants? Where are you going?" questions. When I told him we were going to the mall, he said "You mean to tell me you chose to get in your car & drive to the mall on the busiest traffic day of the week (Sunday afternoon)? You sure you dont wanna re-think that answer?" I dont remember my exact answer was, but I told him that I was in fact going to the mall in the most sarcastic tone I thought I could get away with (prolly not much). My saving grace was some kids starting cussing loudly on the corner across the street and he said "I'm gonna let you guys go while I deal with these jackoffs over there".
Nothing. Only 22, of course. But I don't smoke, I didn't drink underage, didn't go to parties, and so on. Most people have a disorderly conduct from when they were young.
Never got a speeding ticket either. Did get a warning once though. We lived out in the country, like 20 miles from school. So everyone would try to get rides to school as soon as possible. So I was driving my friend and myself to school. And we were running late. Plus, he said he wanted to stop somewhere and get some breakfast. The officer clocked me doing 63 in a 45 zone. I explained to him that I was running late for school, and he let me off with a warning. I got lucky.
Let me tell about what happened to my boss one time though. He was at a Milwaukee Brewers game. I can even tell you the exact date because Wisconsin court records are kept online at http://wcca.wicourts.gov/ . It was May 27th, 1999. Records say the Brewers were playing Atlanta that day. They had gotten some nice tickets from a vendor, down the first base side in the front-most row. There was a questionable call at first base, and a bunch of people start throwing their plastic bottles onto the field. So he's a little drunk, and he throws his bottle on the field. And immediately he realizes he's in trouble, because the first base umpire points him out to security. Now, he had the keys to the car that the drove down in. The other members of his party just hung out with some biker guys after the game for a couple hours until his wife bailed him out of the Yellow Room.
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Once, for being Drunk and Disorderly. My mates put me in a cab and sent me home one night I *think* I threw up in the cab and got turfed by the driver. I don't recall anything between getting in the cab and getting into the back of the Paddy Wagon. I do remeber the cops called me "Spewy" and asking them if they were taking me to my mates place. I spent about 6 hours in the drunk tank, sleeping mostly. On a cement floor with my arm for a pillow. Then had to walk about 5 miles home, very cold and still in a very unfit state.
Another weird quirk I just remembered is that whenever I use the microwave, I always have to put a "3" at the end of the instructed cooking time. If the food item box says to cook on HIGH for 5 minutes, I will punch in "5: