CABLE GUIDE SPOILERZ:New, HD. "Where Is My Boyfriend?", (2011). Snooki and Deena are released from the police station after their accident. Later, Snooki's boyfriend Jionni visits, but their romantic reunion comes to an abrupt halt, and a sobbing Snooki end the night alone on the streets of Florence. (Reality).
PREVIOUSLY ON JERSEY SHORE: Jionni will be there shortly and Snooki will suck his butt! Snooki rams a cop and cries! That's it!
(Click on most pictures to enlarge!)
Opening credits - this is episode 8 from season 4 of "Jersey Shore," rated TV-14-DSLV and premiering 9/22/11 (HAPPY BIRTHDAY MOM) on MTV! It is NOT in HD, but rather in "windowbox" and no, I don't know WHY they can't air it in HD, and believe me, it bugs ME more than it bugs YOU.
We pick up where we left off last week with ... well, actually we step back a few moments in time to replay the end of last week. THIS time we get to learn the results of Snooki's instant breathalyzer test - 0.00. What a relief! Meanwhile, the boys are racing to deliver Snooki's license to the cops, but stuck in traffic. So Deena and Snooki are loaded into the back of a cop car and taken off to the police station. "(Fuck) my life!"
They're here! They're too late! The cops are gone - all that remains are a tow truck to collect the Fiat. After some poor English is swapped with some poor Italian, it is determined that the fellas need to go to the police station and see what's up. Pauly wonders if they'll be allowed to remain in Italy! Also, he says goodbye to the Fiat.
Here we are at the police station - sorry, corpo di polizia municipale, where ** NOW PLAYING: Atlantic Line - Big Brother (The W at Amazon) ** Mike says they spent two hours in a waiting room, molto, molto paperwork terminale and they were able to spring Team Meatball. Everyone's all smiles as they exit the station. Well, so she wasn't in the Italian jail very long. Snooki tells us they took her license, but she didn't really want to ever drive in Italy again anyway. Five crammed into the remaining Fiat for the drive home. Pauly tells us Snooki wasn't going to jail, wasn't arrested, just had to pay some fines. We never find out what happened to the cops loaded into the ambulance on stretchers - I guess they were just being overly dramatic for the benefit of our cameramen. Snooki sums it up with "shit happens."
AND WE'RE BACK. Sammi, who has no idea what's been going on, gets brought up to speed. Snooki wastes little time heading to the phone to call up ON THE PHONE: SNOOKI'S BOYFRIEND JIONNI. He's excited! She's excited! She tells him about running into the cop car. His first question: "Were you drunk?" His second: "Are you okay?" Now, that MIGHT be editing, but given all we've learned about this kid so far, perhaps not. Jionni ALSO reveals that Roger has texted him saying he won't be able to get away from work and won't be joining him on the trip to Italy, which is news to everybody. Snooki tell us that if Jionni were pulling what Roger's doing, she'd go ahead and jump off the balcony and splatter herself all over the street. We hope this isn't foreshadowing anything for Jwoww later. Expressions of love are exchanged and Snooki hangs up.
...and IMMEDIATELY runs to Jwoww to break the news to her. Jenni takes it ...not well. I mean, she's not jumping, but she's very unhappy. She tells us she's been planning this since arriving in Italy, and wants to throw up.
To the phone! ON THE PHONE: JWOWW'S BOYFRIEND ROGER. Is it true? Sadly, it is true. He wasn't able to give enough notice to get the time off. Consider this - somehow, MTV didn't give enough lead time for Roger to be able to take the time off, and his job - what does he do, anyway? He's a trainer, right? He couldn't get out of...training? ANYWAY. There's a long silence (except for th sensitive background music) as Jenni tries to process this - long enough that Roger has to ask if she's still on the phone. Finally, she starts crying. Roger's sorry, but it's out of his hands. Expressions of love are exchanged and she hangs up. "That suuuuuuuuuuuuuuuucks." She's sad she got her hopes up and her eye makeup is doing a good job holding together. All the girls are sad for Jenni! Perhaps they should drink! Deena's got all the answers for everything and they lie at the bottom of a shot glass!
Snooki opts out. "See you hookers later." Deena says it's girls' night at Astor tonight. Meanwhile, the fellas are going to party as a separate group. Mike tells us that MVP + Ronnie = MR. VP. OK.
At Astor (astorcafe.com), the mission is to "get Jenni a little tipsy." Shots are consumed and Jenni is smiling. The girls dance - Jenni's dancing seems to involve not letting her feet leave the ground. Yes, we get an obligatory "Jersey turnpike" from Deena...on Jenni? Ew.
The fellas look to be at SPACE ELECTRONIC (spaceelectronic.net) - actually, that link isn't working - I found another one (spaceclubfirenze.com) but it hasn't been updated since they announced their Super Bowl XLV party (SPOILER ALERT: Packers win!) - but I digress; they're there and having a good bleepin' time. ** NOW PLAYING: Richie Beretta f/ The Ranger - Gna Getchya (Midnight Society's Dark Electrotribe Mix) (beatport.com) ** Mike latches on to some Australians and shows them his (not quite as toned as usual) abs. To us, Mike appreciates "the ratio of hot dog buns to hot dogs" at this place! While you ponder THAT metaphor, here's Ron doing the goofy Ron dance.
Back at the house, Snooki is back on the phone with Jionni but the doorbell is ringing (and we hear shouting) - out on the street is BRITTANY and she wants in. "WHAT the HELL" - will she ignore her because she's a fuckin' stalker, or will she let her in to make life miserable for Mike? So she let's her in. "God, she's such a dumb blonde." To Snooki's credit, Brittany IS about four episodes late (The W).
Brittany seems a little wasted. A little? A LOT wasted. She wants to know where Mike is, and she wants to know now! Well, Mike's not here.
Mike, in fact, is loading up a taxi with himself, his roommates, and some Australian women.
Nicole shows Brittany the room where they do all their confessionals and gets her to talk about Mike, while she makes demeaning faces and hand motions behind her back. Brittany likes Mike because he's so different! Snooki agrees.
Doing the alternating thing here - Mike appears to only now be learning his new friend's name. If she's Australian, why are they trying to communicate in English? I'm so confused.
Snooki tells Brittany that she's close with Mike and he has revealed to her how much he longs for Brittany to come over every day, call every day, and to buy him flowers. In short, to stalk him. She totally buys this.
And NOW we get a shot of the other ladies arriving back at the house. Jenni's gotta pee! Snooki has a surprise for them and leads them to a hidden Brittany (who she decides is a "wildebeest" - well, that's gnu. Ba-dum-bum.) Jenni registers the most shock where a camera can capture it and tells US that this is the ultimate prank that Snooki's pulling off. I guess Nicole's rebounded nicely from the car accident earlier today! They tell her to go sleep in Mike's bed while waiting for him to come home. It's truly amazing that this crew actually has someone for THEM to look down upon. To us, Nicole and Deena are happy that Mike is finally gonna get his for all the crap he's been saying about Jionni.
The fellas have FINALLY arrived home and it's time to bring 'em up and get this pot stirred. It looks like everybody got a girl except Ronnie. Nicole is so excited, she's going to poop her pants!
COMING UP: Mike is in a Situation!
LATER: Snooki FLIPS OUT
Every time I see this Jamster ad I have to tell you how much I hate Jamster - Jamster, more like SCAMSTER, right? Ah ha ha. You got a text that says "THE SITUATION" and it only cost you $9.99 a month FOR THE REST OF YOUR LIFE. "Ha, ha!"
This part you just saw. Deena: "Yo, who goes here?" Ron: "It's me, open the (fucking) door!" Everybody's in and everybody can't wait to see what happens next - looks like Vinny and Pauly are giving tours - Mike and his girl (who may or may not be named NISA) head to his room and Mike discovers a foot sticking out of his bed. For some reason, he's talking in what I'll assume is his impression of an Australian accent. Covers off! It's Brittany! Her skirt can barely contain her ass! Pauly comes in eating something - and regards the surroundings. Nicole tries to stir the pot, but "what the hell" doesn't seem to be enough for this Situation. Nicole tells US she's all "hi, yeah, I did that, don't talk (shit) about me or I'm gonna get you." Meanwhile, Mike tries explaning that "she lives here" - meanwhile, she's stripping in front of BOTH of them. Whaaaa.... Mike tells us that the bird in the hand is worth two in the...well, he doesn't turn that phrase, but the upshot is he knows Brittany is DTF so he's not gonna waste any more time trying to figure out this OTHER "maybe." And she is dispatched with haste. Brittany is his "bun in the oven - don't need to warm up another one" and AGAIN with the inappropriate metaphors from somewhere in the outfield. Mike is fixated on buns tonight - which is weird, because he seems more interested in Brittany's bra. Nicole: "You're welcome, Mike, you (fuckin') froot loop!" Nicole now realises this prank backfired on her because she handed Mike just what he wanted most - a hot, sloppy vagina. She commiserates with Deena out on the smokin' courtyard for smokin'. "Yeah, cool prank."
Time passes - next we see Brittany leaving. She ALMOST stayed the night! Nicole is FREAKING OUT because Jionni will be here later! She keeps making the Snooki "meeeeeeeh" yell from behind the bathroom door. Jenni says "your man will be here soon - must be nice." To us, Nicole reveals that she's freaking out. Jenni: "Spread your legs - I'm going in." No, it's for the application of spray tan - whew, we dodged a bullet THERE. Snooki is concerned that after a month of not seeing each other, he might find her "fat, or pale, or gross." Now why would he EVER find her ANY of those things? That's not our Snooki!
Snooki models a series of outfits while Jenni provides play by play to Roger (ON THE PHONE: JWOWW'S BOYFRIEND ROGER). "That's nighttime." STOMP-STOMP-STOMP. Finally, they settle on an outfit that Nicole says makes her look like a cop - but Jionni will like it because her (tits) are out. I wonder if anybody's working today!
Vinny and Pauly egg on Snooki - why isn't he here yet? Where is he? Pauly says Nicole has reason to be nervous - through flashbacks, we are reminded that Snooki had a sorta-kinda with Mike, and there was that whole lesbihonest experience we all had to endure in the previous episode. Jionni doesn't really know everything that's gone down and the truth will have to come out sooner or later. Pauly predicts that whatever pops, it's gonna be nuts!
Here's one you don't hear from Snooki: "I am just thinking way too much." I hope she can choke down that glass of white wine!
Vinny tries to convince Snooki that the doorbell was ringing, but she's not having it. Vinny is such a dick! Also, he's wearing his sunglasses in the house.
There's a taxi and it looks like - yes - JIONNI is finally here. Snooki actually goes all the way downstairs to meet him - while they hug in a tender reunion, let's listen to ** NOW PLAYING: 16 Frames - Like Diamonds ** Yes, she missed him! Oh no, the door has closed behind her - so they need to get buzzed in again. Vinny: "We don't want any - get the hell outta here!"
COMING UP: Mike works on his karate!
LATER: Nicole cries and screams! I feel like this reunion may not last very long!
That last bit was so emotional, let's relive it! Vinny ALSO relives it by leaping into Pauly's lap and doing a Snooki impersonation. To us, Snooks reveals that Jionni is her entire world, her life. He's Crocodilly (her giant stuffed alligator) but alive! I think that means she sleeps with him. Sure. People are happy to see Jionni - well, Mike disappears, so ALMOST everybody is happy. Nicole wants to immediately head to the smush room and fuck, but Jionni wants to take a shower after his million hour flight. She doesn't want him to shower, but lets him. She prepares the smush room while he prepares himself - lots of Febreezing to keep them from getting diseases....wait, what? Out of the shower and looking fresh! On his way to the smush room, he DOES spy Mike in the kitchen and wants to say "hi" to him since he's said hellos to everyone else - Mike gives him a quick handshake but tries to keep his nose buried in the refrigerator. I think he's scared of Jionni! Off to the smush room! Mike tells Vinny that Jionni is "very curious about me." Vinny is skeptical! We take a flashback of Mike talking to the fellas about getting with Nicole while she was with Jionni. Vinny says he doesn't think Jionni has a problem with him, but Mike cannot be swayed from his firm belief that Jionni is obsessed with him and can't wait to spring on him. Mike's guard is up and he's ready to throw feet!
Nicole is ALSO ready to throw down, in a different sense. As we go to grainyvision and focus intently on Jionni's back tattoo (cross, with a word or two), we hear Nicole telling us how she longs to touch Jionni's tan(bleep) - I thought it might have been "tanwiener" but later she says "I probably shouldn't have said that, but his wiener's tan" and they didn't bleep "wiener" that time, and while I love you, I don't love you enough to keep going back to try to read her lips and figure out just which euphamism she may or may not have been using to talk about Jionni's penis. OK, we get it, they're doing it, let's please move on
In the community bathroom where everyone is preparing themselves, Mike continues to talk about how Jionni better keep his distance or there'll be feet. Jenni: "What is WRONG with you?" Deena: "Yeah, just relax." Mike doesn't WANT to relax!
Montage of Mike practicing his karate moves. Deena: "Do your thing, Kung Fu Panda."
Getting ready for the club montage! Nicole has chosen a rather short, revealing outfit and Jionni isn't sure about it. Ronnie tells us that the thing barely covers her kooka.
Cabs are here! Mike again says that he thinks Jionni knows, but if he comes to him, he'll spill it detail by detail, and if he comes too close, he'll kick him. Vinny covers his face, which may be an editing job, but he does a great job encapsulating my feelings about what Mike's slinging at this point.
In the other cab, Sammi points out Manduca - which means that a promotional fee may or may not have been paid by Manduca (ilmanduca.com), where we happen to be right now. Nicole wastes no time going to the bar! "We're in Italy, babe!" Jionni: "Your balls are out." I don't even know.
Dancing time! Well...standing around time for MVP. Mike, to Vinny: "This floor...it's got good grip." See, for the karate moves. Vinny doesn't roll his eyes, which probably took some heroic restraint. As he displays a karate move, MTV plays a GONG sound effect FOR effect.
Dancing! Nicole and Jionni are dancing! Mike draws Jenni nearer...to tell her he's never been caught with his guard down. If he so much as winks, Mike will kick him. Jenni tells US she told Mike there is no beef and to stop being a fucking idiot. Mike says he only got his guard down once, with Ron, because he didn't know they were going to fight. Jenni mentions that they DIDN'T fight; he knocked himselef out. We flash back to Mike getting caught off guard by the concrete wall. Jenni sees Mike throwing a kick, slipping on a banana and breaking his ankle. "What is WRONG with you?"
At the bar, Jionni gets Nicole to turn her head so he can whisper (into his mic) "I have never loved something so much in my entire life." To us, Nicole reveals that she can't wait to get married and push out a whole buncha guido babies! They'll be so cute and tan. "I f****** love you!" To us, she explains that she will have a C-section because she doesn't want to fuck up her vagina. (To those of you who are just kinda scanning through this report, I do hope you can go back and reread that previous sentence.) ** NOW PLAYING: Parade of Lights - Starstruck (myspace.com) ** We alternate between shots of Jionni and Snooki kissing and Mike peering out from beneath his blue sunglasses. He tries Ron. "Ron, this kid's giving me looks, dog." Meanwhile, Snooki thinks Mike is hovering and she doesn't like it - tells Sammi Mike's hanging around and being a d******* - we'll guess "dickhead" for the right number of asterisks. Jenni thinks that Snooki, by virtue of continuing to talk, is going to end up causing the very confrontation that nobody but Mike had been expecting to happen. More furtive glances from Mike and his blue sunglasses. Now Pauly suggests reconvening at Twenty-One. Sammi says Nicole's on edge - and you never know what Mike's gonna do.
COMING UP: Jionni is OUTTA HERE
Snooki cracks open a Wonderful pistachio with a tanning bed - Wonderful!
Oh no...I just saw the trailer for the new "Footloose." Oh no.
In the cab on the way to 21, Mike relays a story of how...nah, I have no idea. Vinny tells us that Mike is paranoid about Jionni and having imaginary confrontations in his head. Pauly tells him to go for it if he wants, knock himself out (oh, the irony) and Vinny adds "but I just want a ticket" and everybody laughs.
We're at 2wenty-1ne (facebook.com) and it's time for more dancing and more staring! Probably some drinking, too. Finally, Mike grabs Nicole and says the last thing he wants to do is kick Jionni in the head but he feels like HE'S staring at HIM. Is there a problem? NICOLE is ready to punch Mike in the face. "Mike, he's not looking at you, so relax." She tells us that Mike isn't going to break them up. He's the guy she wants to marry!
Asking him to deposit her on a raised floor so she can dance, he does - and there is enough blurring going on for us to gather that she probably needs to adjust her skirt. Now she's pulling it up - I'm guessing (again, from the blurring) that whatever underwear she's got on underneath isn't appropriate for our TV-14 prying eyes. Jionni seems less than enthralled. "Everybody can see your p****."
Snooki doesn't seem to care - she's got a pretty wide grin going at this point. Ron is agog and mouths "what the FUCK" for our benefit. Jionni: "You're dancing like a f****** whore." She tries to draw him closer but he says "Stop!" "Come here." "Stop." "Are you done? You don't want to talk to me? Bye." And she goes back to dancing. Jionni throws the jacket he was holding at her and takes off. A dramatic change in our music indicates that something has just changed. Jionni blows by Jenni. "What happened?" "She's embarrassing me!" and he doesn't even break stride on his way out the door and, presumably, he's gonna walk all the way back to Marlboro. Jenni chases after him and says "stop" a couple hundred times but no effect.
Snooki is now crying and panicking - where is Jionni? She chases after him.
Jionni walks down the street and Nicole fails to catch up in those heels. "I will kill you in two seconds."
Deena decides this is pointless and she's not going to get involved. She and Sammi continue drinking.
Snooki wipes out on the cobbles. Jionni keeps going.
Ronnie is chasing after Jionni - he catches Snooki (who is yelling out "I just wanna lay with you, what is WRONG with you") and tries to convince her to turn back to Jenni while he catches him. Nicole yells out for nobody to touch her right now. Jenni tries to stop Nicole from "doing it to him" but Nicole won't have it - now she's SCREAMING for Jenni to leave her alone. Jenni screams back, asking her to "man up and realise you're acting like an (asshole)!" "Where's he going, Jenni, where's he going?" "He's going away from you!" "You're such a bitch!" Jenni says she may be being a bitch, but she's trying to give her a reality check. All four girls have gotten together at this point. Jenni and Nicole sure are screaming a lot for this time of night. "Where's my BOYFRIEND?!" Jenni says she'll put aside the lousy thing's Nicole is saying while she's drunk - she's gotta find Jionni for her best friend. ** NOW PLAYING: Hell and Lula - 2/5 Divine **Nicole screams to nobody in particular that she doesn't deserve this!
COMING UP: Jionni continues to attempt to stay just out of camera range and ignores Jenni's repeated pleas to stop already! Nicole cries some more.
Stacker 2 6 Hour Power Energy Shot "Hookup!" Sammi/Deena ad
Nicole is too drunk and crying to be attempting to negotiate these streets in those heels. Deena and Jenni are also heel-impaired at this point. Nicole beats up a taxi which must have been in her way. Deena and Sammi agree; Nicole is drunk! Meanwhile, Ron HAS caught Jionni - from the way he keeps saying "it's just me," I think it's more that he's not going to bring a cameraman with him rather than he's not with any of the girls. Ron says he doesn't want Jionni to leave Snooki because he kinda sees "the old me and Sam" there. Now, why he would wish that on ANYBODY...
It really looks like our cameraman is trying to be hidden from Jionni's view, yet still zoom in and capture this conversation. Jionni asks Ron how he'd feel if it were Sam out there dancing, lifting her skirt and showing her bleep - and Ron kinda understands his argument. Ron says "It's the life you walked into" and it's clear that all the really interesting stuff is too meta for our editing crew to deal with, so they just cut around it. Jionni is clearly no fan of reality television. You'd almost feel sympathy for the kid except, as Ron said, the dummy damn sure should have known what he was getting into when he figuratively signed on with Snooki. "You wanna walk away from her?" "I have to." "Seriously?" To us, Ron is incredulous that he let himself get picked up at Seaside..."but at the same time, I see his point of view." Man, it's RON with the "Dr. Phil" hat this week. He says Snooki shouldn't be "single Snooki" when she has a boyfriend. Ron suggests: "As a real man...TALK to her." Exasperated, and probably thinking that people are again attempting to set him up for another performance in front of the cameras, Jionni again takes off and out of the frame. In validation, Ron shrugs to the camera.
Nicole is sobbing. Deena tries to help her out, without touching her.
Jenni chases after Jionni and yells a lot - and stumbles on the cobblestones. She predicts bleeding heels before the night is over! "Only because I love her. Only because I f****** love her!" Finally, she takes the shoes off. "Well...at least I get to say I walked f****** Florence barefoot."
Snooki sobs all over the place to Sammi and Deena. Somebody has roses for somebody but Snooki is inconsolable. Sammi wants to cry herself! Looks like we'll get seven in the cabs for home...
...while Jenni continues to roam the streets of Florence in her bare feet calling out for Jionni.
In the cab, Snooki repeatedly says she hates him, and then start throwing a tantrum, kicking against the cab door. Sammi...actually uses some rather impressive sounding Italian (with accent!) in getting the cab moving towards the house. Also, somebody really has to pee.
All Nicole wants is to be alone, but they're not going to let her be alone outside the house "because there's creeps."
Mike ALMOST starts trying to make a move, but somehow figures out this isn't the time. Turning to Pauly, he asks what's up. Pauly uncharacteristically answers "Who cares?" and Mike does a mock bawling to put his arms around Pauly.
Vinny, who thinks it's ridiculous that Jionni would have such a reaction just because Snooki did something "a little skanky," manages to talk Snooki into the house by reminding her that with his passport inside the house, Jionni will have to eventually return. "You have collateral, so he can't leave you."
Vinny has that look that indicates he'd rather be anywhere else on Earth than next to Snooki right now. After a big fight, people just need to cool down.
There's Jionni! He's sitting on a bench with his thoughts! He must not know that cameraman can see him!
Vinny predicts that later, Snooki will wonder why she was ever crying so much. I wonder if he believes that. He encourages her to breathe. "Everything is OK, I promise." "I just wanna go." "Where do you wanna go? Tell me." "I just wanna go to sleep." And she heads upstairs and into bed. ** NOW PLAYING: Dandylion WarPaint - Drowning (iTunes Music Store) **
More sitting by Jionni, more crying by Snooki, more walking and shouting by Jenni. And now Jenni is giving up and heading back to the house. "My feet are (fucking) bleeding." Pauly gets caught up on what happened. Jenni estimates her calling out of Jionni's name at about five thousand times. "What HAPPENED?" Jenni says Snooki showed her vagina and boobs on the dance floor and he got embarrassed. Pauly, to us: "Jionni knew what he was getting into - he should be more secure - that's no way to handle your problems, my dude."
Was Snooki in the smush room? Looks like it, and she's moving out.
Sammi and Jenni engage in whispers! Sammi actually feels bad for both of them - this night has actually given her a lot of insight into how she and Ron were behaving. Jenni: "Now you see why we get involved, and what it does to us." "Yeah, that was bad!" Snooki comes back in with her bedding. "Can we do anything for you?" "Don't...talk to me." So they vacate and leave her alone. "I feel f****** terrible. Don't f****** like this s***."
In the living room, nobody's sure what to do...except Vinny: "you know what to do? Get your (fucking) ass into the kitchen and make me a cheeseburger."
Amazingly, the fellas DO get to grilling - or, rather, burning.
Jionni MAY be walking back to the house!
Nicole is crying.
Jionni rings the bell. Nicole leaps out of bed and onto the balcony to see if it's him. She let's him in and heads downstairs to meet him. Without breaking his stride, he continues up the stairs and straight to his belongings. Nicole follows and demands some answers - and doesn't get any. Jionni finds the bathroom (knowing the one room where there are no cameras) and closes the door behind him, leaving Nicole to attempt to talk through the door. "Go. Get away from me." "No, I'm NOT gonna get away from you, you (asshole)." "(sigh) There goes my life." Nicole goes NUTS, calling him a bleeping psycho, he's so mean, she hates him, and so on. "I (fucking) love you, you (fucking dick)!" Later, "I hate you!" "All right, bye, then leave." Finally she makes her way into the bathroom - and keeps the door just cracked enough for us to see her. Jionni asks her if she did or did not lift up her skirt on the dancefloor. She repeatedly denies it, which is the wrong answer, although she does say it more loudly and in more hysterics each time she repeats it. "See you, you can walk away. G'ahead. You screwed up with me. ... So just go over there. Get out of here. I'm done with this; I'm done with you. I don't need a girl to lift up her skirt on the stage. Get out of here. See ya. You're single."
"This is Ron and Sam last year - and we didn't know what to do!" Sammi tells us this was like a movie of her and Ron - and she doesn't like it. "Now I get it! I'm sorry!" Pauly and Jenni don't need the apology but I'm sure they didn't mind hearing it.
Snooki again goes to bed (blurred out butt until the covers cover it). "He's my boyfriend. It's not even funny anymore." Well...she's half right.
Seeing this ad for "The Sitter," it's hard to reconcile the Jonah Hill starring this December with the Jonah Hill I JUST saw on "Letterman" earlier this week
A quick hit from the previous segment and there's only about three minutes left in this show so how much more can we have? In bed, Snooki says she's ready to come home. Well, Snooki was finally coerced into the "interview" space to give us some insight from there. She's pissed off that she waited all this time only to have Jionni turn on her and take off. She doesn't deserve this.
Jionni stealthily removes his possessions from Snooki's room and exits.
On his way out and by the rest of the housemates, who are eating. Jenni asks if there's anything they can do to change his mind. To us, Jenni says that flying 21 hours so you can leave 6 hours later after an argument doesn't bode well. Mike tells us that on the surface, Jionni seemed like a nice kid, but he was a real wankster. ** NOW PLAYING: Anomie Belle - Before You Leave Me ** Vinny says that Jionni knew what he was getting into, and for all this to blow up over Snooki acting out in a club...well, that's just weak. Snooki, having figured out Jionni was leaving, takes off after him but is a few too many steps behind - his taxi has already left by the time she gets outside the front door. To us: "I'm a really good girlfriend! I didn't cheat on you, I didn't do anything. Maybe I'm a little crazy when I drink but that's it. Like...I just don't understand why he left me, because he knows that I love him." Back to bed, crying, camera pans up to a photo of her and Jionni. Awwww.
NEXT TIME: Jenni tries to talk to Jionni on the phone on Snooki's behalf. That must go real well, because at the next cut, Snooki is hopping into bed with Vinny. Later, Mike lays a rap on Snooki and tells her he loves her! That'll work!
Closing credits are enhanced by scenes from - yes - "Ridiculous."
Wow, that last half was pretty hard to watch. Not that I stopped, mind you....but I can see why they'd go straight to "Snooki and Vinny in bed" scenes to try to bring us back for next week, 'cause....dude.
Which works, given the plot of the movie. I'm sidetracking here, but the concept of the movie (young boy has son, raises son poorly because he's a kid) had potential, even (especially?) with the casting of Sandler and Sandberg.