Quick n' Dirty with full coverage linked here at ECW Results.
Opening: Teddy Long in Halloween garb as "Legendary Anchorman" Ron Burgundy. Opens the show with a mock newscast announcing the Miz and Morrison "Dirt Sheet" on DX and exciting six man with Chavo, Bamm Neely, and Mark Henry vs. Finlay, Evan Bourne, and ECW Champion Matt Hardy. Hornswoggle slipped moron into the teleprompter causing Teddy "Ron Burgundy" Long to call himself that. They showed him jumping around laughing at his deed.
Chavo, Bam Neely, and Mark Henry def. Matt Hardy, Finlay, and Evan Bourne when Chavo hits the frog splash on Matt Hardy. Decent little match.
Jack Swagger def. Tommy Dream with the Gutwrech Powerbomb.
Live Dirt Sheet. Morrison wearing press on diamonds on his abs.
Morrison spoofs a campaign commercial. Obama reference and McHurt.
Then the joke DX comes out to confront Miz and Morrison where they talk until they beat them up. Show ends. I am liking the ECW formula right now.
I'm not really into the Miz/Morrison vs. DX thing. I think it's because there's really no chance that Miz and Morrison will really get any credible offense in, nor will HHH or Michaels ever once acknowledge them as a credible threat. So it sort of seems like... what's the point?
I don't generally enjoy large tag matches, and last night's was no exception. Just a bunch of running around, though I do like the build-up of Evan Bourne (though I'm unsure of how high he can ascend given his stature and not being named "Mysterio" or "Guerrero"), who I've been impressed with since his debut. I was actually impressed with Sydal back in WSX when he was in that, though of course he looks better in the context of actual matches that make sense.
Swagger vs. Dreamer was pretty good. Jack Swagger is pretty awesome; all his moves look really crisp (though it looked like he underestimated Tommy's girth when executing his finishing move).
Even though I was there live, there were a couple of things here I wanted to see on TV before I commented on.
Looks like Bourne's actual injury was his right ankle, so they spent the match working his left. I remember being displeased with Bam Neely for what looked to me like a too-stiff slam. Watching on TV, I see that Evan wasn't really able to get properly into position, & their timing was off. Bam, lesson for next time: this is why improv skills are important. Do not try to brute force a move by muscling around somebody, especially when they're hurting. That's how Brock Lesnar managed to break Bob Holly's neck. (Although the circumstances were rather different.)
Tommy / Swagger did actulally look pretty good on TV. I was surprised. What I kept thinking during the match live was, "Poor Tommy -- his 19th anniversary, & he's stuck trying to drag around this burlap bag full of wet sand." I'm still trying to reconcile that. Maybe it was during y'all's commercial break when Jack shut down. Maybe the camera guys were pulling out all the jiggle-n-zoom special tricks. Maybe I was at exactly the wrong angle for everything. Maybe I was overcome by a wave of hypoglycemia during those 9 minutes. I certainly didn't think that there was any more Tommy could have done. Very odd.
Y'all aren't up in arms about an hour show a) with only 2 matches, &, b) where the "ME" was actually just an extended talking segment? Again, I'll give you that it read much better on TV than it did sitting there. And I even happened to be on the fixed camera side -- would have been even more dreary just watching the back of the talking heads.
I was very concerned that this, in addition to the set changeover, would make for a kinda dead crowd at the beginning of SD (The W). Fortunately it didn't, & actually the heel promo ended up getting M&M some extra heat on Primo / Carlito at the top of SD. It was a little confusing though: "Wha? Are DX going to do a runin here?"
Just goes to show that the live experience is sometimes very different from the TV experience.
The 2004 Rumble told a much better story. It was a longer, better match with a brilliant finish. While the 2005 Rumble was good and entertaining, it was no where near the level of last year's. And the finish was fricking lame ass.