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The W - Pro Wrestling - DVDVR ROAD REPORT: NWA VA 3/13/2004!
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He is DEAN

Since: 11.12.01
From: Richmond, Va, U-S-A!

Since last post: 2625 days
Last activity: 2622 days
#1 Posted on | Instant Rating: 9.85
I stole all results from Nathan Aberkrombie at the NWA VA page since it was GWA-traineetastic and I couldn't possibly keep them all straight. I drove the comical Mapquest route which I discovered was COMPLETELY preposterous when I drove back home. I arrived as the first match started and pestered young Zhixel. Young Zhix was scoping underage pussy and the MILF contingent in a stunning display of lointacular horniness. I opt to buy 56 slabs of pizza and endear myself to the Prince George High School marching band fundraisers.

PRINCE MALIK vs JON JON THE PHENOMENON: Prince Malik and Jon Jon the Phenomenon have a match with a thousand Kanyonesque finishers. It was like 74 finishers. It was an opening match. Maybe 86 finishers. It was waaaay too many finishers for a regular wrestling match much less an opening match. Neither of these guys suck but Jesus does PQ need to sit them down and show them how to throw a worked punch.

SCOTTY BLAZE vs MIKE THOMAS: Scotty Blaze comes out with the lovely Erotica. Scotty Blaze weighs a metric ton and I dread the match- figuring that Blaze is some overweight trainee. Mike Thomas comes out and doesn't Riverdance so I am put off. LUCKILY SCOTTY BLAZE FUCKING MOTHERFUCKING RULES. He works all stiff and bumps like two-ton freak. I ask Rick and Dave about Blaze and they say he works out in western Virginia and that explains why I haven't beheld the glory of his fat greatness. Mike Thomas doesn't work overly stiff but does drop a sweep elbow drop. Scotty Blaze fucking rules. Erotica needs to smack the opponent of her man more. She was a little timid and should use her awesome boots for more evil.

MIKE LYNN/ DONAVAN TORREZ/ SEAN CALLAWAY vs PETE JANNINGS/ GRAILLE/ QUICKSTYLE: MIKE LYNN~! Graille is secret good little worker of the Virginia indies. Mike Lynn refuses to ever drop an elbow and it irritates me. Playboy Pete Jannings is perfectly fine but everybody is off or just recently trained so this pretty much indy wrestling right in the middle of all indy wrestling. Mad phat props to NWA Va booking for not being pussies- as they had way over hometown boy Quickstyle take the pin.

CHRIS DRAMIN vs EL TORO ROJO: Dramin has put on a batch thickness- looking very Val Veniscito-esque. Toro Rojo is a spot machine who is pretty nifty. He will be in a wheelchair by age 23 if he ever tries the AMAZINGLY stupid Shooting Star Diving Headbutt ever again. Dramin did well to put on weight as I buy his offense now. Dramin won with something. Oh actually, Rojo won as I check the results.

COACH DAVE EMORY/ JAY OWENS/ TREY OWENS vs NEIL SHARKEY/ MALICIOUS MURPHY/ DRAGAN FROST: This is hair vs hair- Coach Dave's vs Neil Sharkey's. Sharkey is peak efficiency riling up the rubes at ringside and was really great being powdered-assed weasel here. The problem was that his offense was somehow stiffer and more believable than his teammates and that ain't good. Sharkey uses the CHAIN~! to hit coach but coach gets the chain and gets the win. A masked man comes and stops the head shaving. I become annoyed at an unfulfilled stip.

KAMEO vs KILEY MCLEAN: To UNIFY THE TITLES! Zhix is transfixed on Kameo- as she is now blond and more tightly clad. Kiley has a good lariat but other parts of her offense- especially the knees to the stomach were ungood. JEFF CAPO IS POWERMAD! The lovely ladies of Virginia Indies start beating the hell out of each other and both skack Capo across the chest to knock him out of the ring! Capo- drunk on power- STOPS THE MATCH AND HOLD UP THE BELTS! BOOOOOOO! BAD REF! BAD REF! Lettem fight! THIS AIN'T NO DAMN SUNDAY SCHOOL!

CHRIS MOTHERFUCKING ESCOBAR vs CHINO MARTINEZ: Chris Escobar is fucking GREAT. I swear to God it reminded me of watching Jeff Hardy carry matches in OMEGA with punches selling and the most grotesque bumps imaginable. I'm glad they put the belt on him. Chino is far more fun as a heel and I was pissed when he didn't clothesline Escobar after handing the belt postmatch.

Intermission we run into OdessaSteps and he looks way too much like Mike Naimark. He is a good guy and we force him to sit with us.

MIKE BOOTH/ DAMIEN WAYNE vs SEAN LEI/ DIRTY MONEY: This wasn't as awesome as it should have been because they were having Dirty Money turn on Sean Lei during the match. Damien Wayne is fucking awesome in execution and he also TERRIFIES the children at ringside. It was AWESOME. Dirty Money beats the hell out of Sean Lei after turning on him to set up OSE's Modified Doomsday Device. I was kinda baffled because Sean Lei was upstaging Dirty Money and you could see Dirty Money's point of view- so it wasn't a clean heel turn, which is kinda cool but I don't think it was the intention.

PHIL BROWN vs BRANDON DAY: Phil Brown looked fucking great- as his execution was pretty swanky. Brandon Day is second only to Escobar in old school Southern bumping to get a match over with the rubes- and we rubes were drawn in. The psychology was pretty cool- Brown the old vet has beat the living flying hell out of the young upstart and the crowd rallies to Day's comebacks. Day completely lands on his shoulder wrong hitting a Shooting Star Press all funny. Day's Gothic gimmick made me feel old as I make jokes about Dead Can Dance and the Sisters Of Mercy and Zhixel looks at me like I was mentioning It's A Beautiful Day and Country Joe and the Fish.

PRESTON QUINN vs THE BARBARIAN: Barbarian was feeling the weight of the relevancy of the match as he sold like I've never seen him sell. I think the quote was "when did Barbarian become Ricky Steamboat?" PQ was fucking awesome making Barbarian's 80s power offense look like NOAH Heavyweight 2004-level deadly. The final powerbomb was fucking GNARLEY as PQ took it like Benoit took the Bret Hart German on their Nitro match. We were all in shock because we were figuring they were going to blow off the stip as easily as the blew off the hair vs hair stip. En lieu, the locker room comes out and reality sets in and I became depressed. Luckily, it's not an injury thing so I can only hope this becomes a Terry Funk type of retirement because wrestling needs Preston Quinns more than ever.

DISCO INFERNO vs CHRIS HARRIS: God, they were perfectly fine and had perfectly perfunctory match but it was so the anti-climax to the PQ match.

Glad I went. PQ and Escobar ruled. Brown vs Day was good. Everything else was a fine if a bit listless. Scotty Blaze I wanna see more of.

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Big Brother

Since: 9.12.01
From: ミネアポリス

Since last post: 6 days
Last activity: 9 hours
#2 Posted on | Instant Rating: 8.65
    Originally posted by DEAN RASMUSSEN
    Intermission we run into OdessaSteps and he looks way too much like Mike Naimark.
a) Poor Mike
b) Poor Mark


Since: 2.1.02
From: MD, USA

Since last post: 1461 days
Last activity: 1428 days
#3 Posted on | Instant Rating: 6.41
(pasted from the DVDVR board)

My friend John and I made the trek up from Va Beach. We take the long-about route, because I wanted to drive out to the not-just-ice cream DQ that's out on route 58. So, we end up drving two sides of a triangle up instead of the hypotenuse that is rte 460.

It was really weird that they had a band playing (I assume students from the school who have their own garage band) at a high school show.

Since neither DEAN nor Zhixel mentioned it, I loved O'Brien's 1980s style Miami Vice skinny white tie.

SCOTTY BLAZE vs MIKE THOMAS: That's "The Heat Miser" Scotty Blaze. Ironically, I described him as looking like a slightly smaller John Tenta.

MIKE LYNN/ DONAVAN TORREZ/ SEAN CALLAWAY vs PETE JANNINGS/ GRAILLE/ QUICKSTYLE: Quickstyle had more heat than Ric Flair in Greenville. And then, all of his fans left after this match. Boo!

CHRIS DRAMIN vs EL TORO ROJO: I said that Toro Rojo should come to the ring with a can of Red Bull (since that's what the name translated to. Wow! Translating Spanish in a report. It's like 2000 all over again and I'm sitting next to Admur at MCW shows at the timekeeper's table.) Rojo's aborted Shooting Star I thought was an homage to Brock Lesnar, since WM was the next day.

KAMEO vs KILEY MCLEAN: To UNIFY THE TITLES! My friend John wondered if Kameo worked this early in the card, so she can have time to get to the strip club before her session starts.

CHRIS MOTHERFUCKING ESCOBAR vs CHINO MARTINEZ: This was a great match. The best of the first half of the show (even though it was like match # 7).

At intermission, I do indeed introduce myself to the great DEAN. I ditch my friend and sit with the man. Fortunately, I spent a week doing it to him at Comic-Con last year, so he doesn't mind.

MIKE BOOTH/ DAMIEN WAYNE vs SEAN LEI/ DIRTY MONEY: I thought that Money's telegraphed heel turn would actually be a swerve and Sean would turn. And I always think that Sean looks like a tattooed Ramblin Rich Myers.

PHIL BROWN vs BRANDON DAY: Like they said, phil was effin' great. Those kids in front of us were a total trip.

PRESTON QUINN vs THE BARBARIAN: Who'd ever seen that Barbarian this good? But I kept wondering where Paul Jones was. Oh that's right, the Barbarian was the FACE. So weird. And PQ was so amazing. It really looked like there would be an angle with Phil Brown at the end of the "retirement ceremony," but, alas, it was not what was really going on.

DISCO INFERNO vs CHRIS HARRIS: Since there was no duck, I didn't care about old Glen.

I'm glad there was finally a NWA show that didn't conflict with something else, so I could finally go. And what a night to go. Thanks again, PQ.

Odessa Steps Magazine
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