New York is one of the 10 cities where they have an open call for the third season of the Apprentice. Since it is my favorite show and most importantly I really need a job right now; I woke up at 5AM to apply. The tryout was at Trump Tower on 5th avenue. This is the ultra high-rent district near Gucci, Prada, and across the street from Playboy HQ. I got on the line at 6:30, but there was no benefit to arriving early. Even had I slept outside with the hardcore fans it wouldnít have mattered, because everyone there by 9 got blue wristbands. (They were called bracelets, but Iím more comfortable calling mine a wristband.) I was #202 out of #280 total applicants.
While waiting for hours on line we got to sign up for MTVís new untitled Apprentice knock-off show, not the Assistant. It looked like the Trump workers were rolling out a cart to treat us with food, only they were just selling bottles of Trump Ice for $3 each. The media was there to take pictures and interview some of the crowd. They all chose the same handful of applicants. The kook in the army shirt, the hobbled guy on crutches, the minority in the business suit, and the girl with the red dress. I thought the girls on line were cute, but I expected more cleavage. Mostly they wore conservative attire and couldnít pass for playboy models. Compare this to the first season when they had all hot chicks while the guys could be on Average Joe.
At 12:30 we made it into a makeshift boardroom which looked like the food court in a mall. We had group interviews with 20 people. There were 2 groups of 10 each sitting around a small round table. Donald and Carolyn were standing nearby. Spectators were allowed in which made for a noisy setting.
Our moderator was Kara, a cute blonde lady. We got to make an opening statement/introduction: ďName, Age, Hometown, What you do, and What makes you special.Ē After the intros, she abruptly left us with a new guy who missed the intros. He was an LA casting assistant metrosexual type and I donít think he liked me. Our group of 10 had a DJ from PA, an Entrepreneur from Detroit, an actor, a physical therapist from NJ, a marketing manager from NH, a mumbler, a french lady, a lawyer, and a motivator. There were 3 women in the group.
It turned into an AOL chat room where a topic is thrown out and everyone talks at once to see who argues the best. The hot topics were to discuss the Martha Stewart trial, the ethics of women using their sexuality in season one, and whether a woman would make a good president. The moderator called our group tame, but his topics were weak. Get me to talk about politics and the war and Iíll go off on you. Next we had to pick out of our group a person to hire, a person to fire, the best talker, the best listener, and the best female. Everyone got to shake hands with Donald Trump before heading home. The lawyer, Cord, got picked to hire and he got to stay for the next round. It was fitting because he was the best at this type of environment.
Next time I think Iím better off sending in a videotape where I have better control over the output. Iíd rather have a real job interview where they pick apart my resume. Only I may apply in person too now that I know what to expect.
Ah, finally an opportunity to post these haikus on a non-Tolkien board: --- Were I a Hobbit, I would never name my son Bilbo: that's just mean. --- Once in Valinor, You couldn't get me to leave: West-side for life, bitch.