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The W - Movies & TV - American Idol '10: Top 11 Perform
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Excalibur05
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Since: 19.1.02
From: Minnesota

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#1 Posted on | Instant Rating: 4.24
So, you know who has an awesome back catalog of music experience and industry toughness to set these crazy Idol kids straight? Miley Cyrus. I can’t tell if I’m being serious or not. She’s only 17 and she’s a complete product of the Disney hype machine, but then again, her life is crazy, y’all. Who better to tell people what it’s like to be super young and on TV all the time?

Tonight’s theme? “Billboard’s Number One Hits.” I love this theme, because there’s so many different genres and songs to choose from, if the contestants pick the right songs, you usually end up with at least one really amazing performance (SPOILER ALERT: They don’t). Plus it beat the hell out of Michael Bolton theme night or whatever in terms of actually figuring out what these kids sound like. Except Casey, of course, who would rock Michael Bolton night.

The judges are looking very dapper tonight. Ok, not really, but at least Ellen’s scarf matches her sweater. Is…is that a euphemism? I don’t even know. Simon already looks pissed the hell off, so he must’ve been here during rehearsal.

(Idol Drinking Game for Tonight: Every time Somebody looks like, “Miley Cyrus is going to tell me how to sing? Really, you guys?” Drink!)

Lee DeWyze
The Song: “The Letter” by The Box Tops
Miley Says: He’s a fine singer, but boring as hell.
The Performance:
Lee gives us our first, “Miley, please!” look tonight when she’s telling him that he’s really boring. Lee’s got a whole horn section out there with him, which isn’t helping, because the horn section is awesome and hilarious and is totally overshadowing Lee. He’s singing fine, but it’s still boring as hell.

Vocally it’s kind of funny, because he’s fine, and it sounds nothing like the version of this song you know. But it really is hard to focus in on the voice when the band and the background singers are selling all out and he’s not. Simon kind of hits the nail on the head that this is a fine “performance” performance, but outside of that it’s just so much chaff it’s ridiculous.
The Judges Say: You are our favorite pen, and we want to write with you(?).
I Say: Can I vote to bring the horn section back for next week?
Score: -1
Change: -1

Paige Miles
The Song: “Against All Odds” by Phil Collins
Miley Says: Pitchy! I get to say pitchy! PITCHY!
The Performance:
Hooooly shit this was tough to listen to. Her voice is in shreds, and this is like…a smooth voice song. And the band almost feels bad for her. Like, the drum beat to send her into the chorus kind of went, “bum…bumm…Bum?” I’d kind of like to give her the benefit of the doubt like Miley did, but she just kind of got slaughtered by this. Bad voice or not.

You can tell she’s feeling it too. Isn’t she supposed to be trying for the fun country vibe too? She hits a couple of the bigger notes and sounds fine, but then it all falls apart again. Kara gets it right on (?!) that Paige just looks like she’s given up on the competition, and she’s an easy elimination this week. Which is funny, because that probably means people will keep her around to spite her.
The Judges Say: It’s like there’s five of you, and they’re all just getting worse.
I Say: The Paige bandwagon has crashed into the station.
Score: -2
Change: -3

Tim Urban
The Song: “Crazy Little Thing Called Love” by Queen
Miley Says: Dang, yo. This guy is boring too! Let’s make out.
The Performance:
The Miley/Tim show looks like it would be a sitcom. They should work on that now that Hannah Montana is over. Seriously though, they probably should. Neither of those two crazy kids is going anywhere any time soon. Though Tim actually sounds ok this week.

Tim’s actually up there giving it a shot, and I know the judges savage him for it, but I actually kind of love this attempt at going balls out and doing a weird Elvis impersonation. He’s out there running through the crowd and doing a baseball slide, and this is probably the most entertaining and relevant this kid will ever be, so hat’s off to him.
The Judges Say: This has been pointless because everybody knows you’re not going to win.
I Say: This was actually kind of…ok?
Score: -1
Change: +1

Aaron Kelly
The Song: “I Don‘t Want to Miss a Thing” by Aerosmith
Miley Says: Finally, somebody I’m bigger and more experienced than!
The Performance:
Ryan said on the commercial that Aaron and Crystal would be singing Aerosmith and Janis Joplin, and I was kind of praying that Aaron would be singing Janis, because that would be awesome. I hope Kara nails him for not properly conveying the feeling of being Liv Tyler watching Bruce Willis die. Oh, spoiler alert from a movie from ten years ago.

This is in that weird Aaron Kelly wheelhouse, where there’s no reason it should work, but it kind of does. Miley’s going nuts in the audience. Kara loves his song choice, because she can almost see Ben Affleck crying in the background. The band starts playing Kara off stage, which is kind of hilarious. It’s not the best performance, and he’s never going to win, but whatever. This week it worked. Seacrest gets in the last word by calling him “David Archuletta.”
The Judges Say: You’re like our own little Justin Beiber. Say “Shawty.”
I Say: It worked for what it was, so good on him for that.
Score: +2
Change: +1

Crystal Bowersox
The Song: “Me and Bobby McGee” by Janis Joplin
Miley Says: Sing higher! See I can give out critiques too!
The Performance:
Crystal looks like she should be giving Miley advice, not the other way around, which gives us our second “Miley, please” moment of the night, when Ms. Cyrus starts throwing down critiques and Crystal just laughs it off. She could play Miley’s mom in the Cyrus/Urban project. Crystal gets Miley to sign her guitar anyway, because I think the mom in her felt bad about laughing at her.

She’s not playing her signed guitar tonight anyway. What’s the point of that? This guitar is bigger than her, which is kind of fun. It looks like a cello. Technically, it’s great, of course. I honestly have a hard time seeing where this is going to be relevant once she’s won this show, but I can’t fault her for that now. That was pretty freaking good. She’s getting a little cocky.
The Judges Say: Loosen up a little bit, because you’re still pretty fantastic.
I Say: Her best performance in a long time, which is great, because she’s going to win this show.
Score: +2
Change: +2

Mike Lynche
The Song: “When a Man Loves a Woman” by Percy Sledge
Miley Says: I’m in super in love with him, but if he calls me Hannah again, I’ll cut him.
The Performance:
Miley alternately loves and hates Mike, because he calls her “Hannah” which sets off her bitch face, but he could probably eat her, so she’s really chill about it. There’s kind of a creepy vibe happening there, actually. Like, Mike is actually singing this directly to her, and Miley’s all into it. It’s weird. Watch out, Tim Urban!

Mike goes all Reuban on the song, and it works to that effect. I love his voice, and once again, this has no future after the competition, but for this show it’s awesome. The judges are right, in that the performance is boring, because this is a boring ass song, but Mike performs it very well. Simon is just happy that Ryan isn’t threatening to beat the crap out of him this week.
The Judges Say: Good, but your wheelhouse is kind of a terrible one to be stuck in.
I Say: The creepy performance with Miley was more entertaining, but this was fine.
Score: +1
Change: +1

Andrew Garcia
The Song: “Heard It Through the Grapevine” by Marvin Gaye
Miley Says: You should probably learn the song. And quit hiding.
The Performance:
Andrew is star struck by Miley of all people. Which is kind of hilarious for a guy with a neck tattoo. This should be interesting, though, given that he’s not trying to do a weird cover of a girl that you can compare to his Hollywood round, even though he has so many choices this week. He could’ve done “Baby, One More Time!” The butterflies would fly away.

He’s not going all Taylor Hicks on this, which I just assumed that he would. Longing shot at Miley a couple times and she’s not paying attention, which is funny. He’s getting out sung by the background singers which isn’t a good sign. Kara tells him to sing “Straight Up” every week, and Simon somehow resists the urge to bitchslap her. Not the worst performance tonight, but not good.
The Judges Say: Somehow, against all odds, you’re going to make the damn tour.
I Say: OH MY GOD! I realized what I hated most about this performance! Andrew’s weird helmet hair makes him look like a California Raisin!
Score: -2
Change: -1

Katie Stevens
The Song: “Big Girl‘s Don‘t Cry” by Fergie
Miley Says: Good song choice anyway, mini-me.
The Performance:
I guess when you want to turn a cutesy young girl into a manufactured pop princess, you send her straight to the reigning queen for advice. Miley’s already apparently been giving Katie fashion advice. I can’t tell if that’s a good thing. You can tell Katie’s pretty much never seen “Hannah Montana,” she has no clue what’s going on here. But hey, it’s a more contemporary song!

Her voice, weirdly, actually fits this song pretty solidly. Despite what the judges have said, her voice is actually twice her age, so instead of singing younger songs, she needs to be singing like she’s 30. Not 80 like she started off though. I’m not blown away or anything. She’s not Kelly Clarkson. But, for her, it was pretty spectacular.
The Judges Say: You listened to what we said, became our cookie cutter pop-princess, and it was great!
I Say: For where she she’s been the past few weeks, this was pretty amazing.
Score: +1
Change: +1

Casey James
The Song: “The Power of Love” Huey Lewis and the News
Miley Says: You lost me at the “I’m a fan of your dad.”
The Performance:
Billy Ray better watch out, because it might not be too long and Casey will be living in his basement. Miley’s advice? Make eye contact with the front row. Which is…like…the judges. Maybe he can make Kara flip out again. Or Randy. Ryan name drops Back to the Future in the intro, because he knows that people our age will appreciate it.

I have a hard time with Casey, because his singing is just mediocre enough to be passable, so that I don’t hate him necessarily, but he’s not great. But he’s by far the best guitar player this show has ever had, so that should be worth something if you’re trying to find a front man to win this show. The two things combined make him worth keeping around. Mad bonus points for bringing back the horn section, dressing them like the Blues Brothers and cutting them loose. They’re having an amazing time tonight.
The Judges Say: You’re going to be safe, but you’re going to have to do something more one of these weeks.
I Say: I really do respect what he brings to the table, but he does sound like an 80s cover band.
Score: +1
Chagne: +1

Didi Benami
The Song: “You’re No Good” by Betty Everett (by way of Linda Ronstadt)
Miley Says: I wish that I could do that with my voice.
The Performance:
Miley and Didi are actually kind of adorable together. I kind of wish Brooke had met Miley, then maybe the nervous breakdown could’ve been avoided. Ryan isn’t helping by calling her Didi Benini, but whatever. She really is the love child of Brooke White and Megan Joy. It’s kind of funny.

An actual cello hits the stage (ok, it‘s a bass). I love the band staging tonight. Everybody’s using them to their most awesome effect (except Crystal). This is actually pretty fantastic. It’s not a recording-level performance, and she loses her weird voice in the power notes, but when she’s just singing straight? I love the way her voice sounds in those parts.
The Judges Say: Perhaps, it is you that is no good.
I Say: I do think she lost her cool-factor when she hit the chorus, but her voice actually is really nice in the runs.
Score: +/- 0
Change: +/- 0

Siobhan Magnus
The Song: “Superstition” by Stevie Wonder
Miley Says: OMG! It’s Siobhan, I’m, like, her biggest fan! Can I have her autograph?!
The Performance:
Dig Siobhan showing up to the studio dressed in literally everything in her closet and calling herself “weird.” She has the nerd voting on lockdown. She and Miley geek out together, and suddenly Didi’s lost her only friend. Aw. I have no idea what Siobhan’s wearing for this performance though. A Faux-hawk, half vest, a giant flower and a shirt made out of doilies. Sure. Whatever.

I have no idea if she forgot the words or whatever, but she lets out one of her screams again, so it’s all forgiven. Really, this was pretty fun. Randy is right (?!) because she comes out with such conviction that sort of makes you forget what a huge nerd she is outside of the competition. Simon is all, “You know what? Fuck your screaming and everything, tonight sucked and I’m in love with Crystal.” Fuck you, Simon.
The Judges Say: You are the clear favorite to finish second in this competition.
I Say: She’s great, and I love her weirdness, but yeah, probably second.
Score:+3
Change: +1

Bottom Three: Paige Miles, Tim Urban, Didi Benami

Another week, and another whole room full of targets. I think Crystal and Siobhan are the only ones who are absolutely safe. A few people are probably good. Katie did well enough, and Aaron, Mike and Casey are probably safe, so that limits our options of people who did poorly enough to get sent home.

Didi was pretty unfairly trashed, I think, but people pick up on that, and she doesn’t have the kind of sound that spurs much voting at this stage of the competition. I think she’s in the bottom three, but probably safe, because hers were the least egregious errors. Tim’s probably also safe, because he’s got this year’s “Cute Boy Who Is Terrible” syndrome that will keep the tween girls texting until he’s in the top seven.

Which is fine with me, because Paige was epically bad this week. And not on the Sanjaya level, where bad at least meant “Batshit insane” but on the level where she was a terrible singer. If she doesn’t go home and one of the other “bad” people does, fine. But I don’t think that’s going to happen.

Prediction: Paige Miles



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Peter The Hegemon
Lap cheong








Since: 11.2.03
From: Hackettstown, NJ

Since last post: 2 days
Last activity: 15 hours
#2 Posted on | Instant Rating: 7.03
    Originally posted by Excalibur05

    Lee DeWyze
    The Song: “The Letter” by The Box Tops
    Miley Says: He’s a fine singer, but boring as hell.
    The Performance:
    Lee gives us our first, “Miley, please!” look tonight when she’s telling him that he’s really boring. Lee’s got a whole horn section out there with him, which isn’t helping, because the horn section is awesome and hilarious and is totally overshadowing Lee. He’s singing fine, but it’s still boring as hell.


I don't watch or follow AI at all, and only happened to see this as I was scrolling through the forum. But if someone's cool enough to sing a song originally sung by Alex Chilton on national television so soon after his death, then that's who I'm rooting for, even if he's boring as hell. B^)
spf
Scrapple








Since: 2.1.02
From: The Las Vegas of Canada

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#3 Posted on | Instant Rating: 5.16
The best part of the night is that Paige almost single-handedly guaranteed that Tim Urban is going to make the national tour. I hope he makes it top 5 before all is said and done, and Simon gets as annoyed as he was during the Sanjaya reign of terror.

I really wanted Crystal to do something other than Janis last night. So many songs out there, she could have done something different than exactly what everyone would have guessed from her. I'm curious what her "big plans for next week" are though.



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JayJayDean
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Since: 2.1.02
From: Seattle, WA

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#4 Posted on | Instant Rating: 7.23
    Originally posted by spf
    The best part of the night is that Paige almost single-handedly guaranteed that Tim Urban is going to make the national tour.


I don't know about that - the judges BURIED Paige like they were obviously trying to get her sympathy votes. I'm sure if they had their say Andrew* would be the one they kicked out and barred from the tour.

*I only made it through Big Mike because IJ had to go to bed. Damn the four-judge/two-hour format. The rest is on DVR to finish tonight.



Holy fuck shit motherfucker shit. Read comics. Fuck shit shit fuck shit I sold out when I did my job. Fuck fuck fuck shit fuck. Sorry had to do it....

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Revenge of the Sith = one thumb up from me. Fuck shit. I want to tittie fuck your ass.
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spf
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Since: 2.1.02
From: The Las Vegas of Canada

Since last post: 8 days
Last activity: 3 days
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#5 Posted on | Instant Rating: 5.16
    Originally posted by JayJayDean
      Originally posted by spf
      The best part of the night is that Paige almost single-handedly guaranteed that Tim Urban is going to make the national tour.


    I don't know about that - the judges BURIED Paige like they were obviously trying to get her sympathy votes. I'm sure if they had their say Andrew* would be the one they kicked out and barred from the tour.

    *I only made it through Big Mike because IJ had to go to bed. Damn the four-judge/two-hour format. The rest is on DVR to finish tonight.



Spoiler Below: Highlight text to read
I was right. Go Tim!

unbreaking the table - thecubsfan

(edited by thecubsfan on 25.3.10 0936)


2007 and 2008 W-League Fantasy Football champion!
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Ah, but you forgot Jillian's husband Derek. I think I was more thinking about Brian and Jillian getting back together, but maybe we could get Mort and Jillian together?
Related threads: American Idol 3/16 - Simon Cowell to leave American Idol - American Idol - New "Judge" - More...
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