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The 7 - Recap Feedback - Year in Quotes 2001: August 2001 Smackdowns
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Andouille
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Since: 3.1.02
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#1 Posted on 1.2.02 1530.53
Reposted on: 1.2.09 1543.40
THE ROCK RETURNS: No, this recap *isn't* later, even later than usual because I'm doing some form of protesting - keep your conspiracy theories to yourself, bunky. Oh boy, three minutes of ROCK ROCK ROCK - or as I like to say, FUHFUHWID
WWF SMACKDOWN 2.8.2001

KURT ANGLE leads us off! Remember him? You know, the guy with the Gold Medals 'round his neck and no hair. Funny looking guy - there you go.
WWF SMACKDOWN 2.8.2001

Commentators shill "Roswell" - man, you'd never DREAM that Tazz and Cole were on different sides listening to them swap witty banter thanks to the fine folks at UPN.
WWF SMACKDOWN 2.8.2001

Fortunately, we go to ad break before he sticks the photo down his pants...
WWF SMACKDOWN 2.8.2001

The end result is I'm sad that I know I can immediately write off a match if I see Patrick in there. Maybe they'll do something about that....maybe. (Hebner/Patrick II should NOT be the answer.)
WWF SMACKDOWN 2.8.2001

OH MAN I'VE MISSED THE ROCK MAKING LISTS
WWF SMACKDOWN 2.8.2001

OH MAN TWO LISTS IN ONE PROMO ROCK E ROCK E ROCK E *cough* *cough* *sputter* ahem. I'm better now. We are saved by NAPPY T.
WWF SMACKDOWN 2.8.2001

Bar that door for me, Kate, we got us a Pier Six here. Amazingly, and by "amazingly," I mean "every time this happens at the start of a WWF match," the ring quickly clears of all but two participants...
WWF SMACKDOWN 2.8.2001

Austin fingers one of Debra's cookies...no, no, DAMN you have a sick mind sometimes.
WWF SMACKDOWN 2.8.2001

Jeff Jarrett's music plays...but alas, it's only MRS. AUSTIN - strange that she gets WWF chyron and a WWF website plug despite being part of the Alliance (and despite the W/ECW logos in the centre of the Time Tunnel).
WWF SMACKDOWN 2.8.2001

Hey Debra's wearing one o' them pornstar belts.
WWF SMACKDOWN 2.8.2001

HEY WOW, it's the "Big Cat" Ernie Ladd lookalike contest winner there!
WWF SMACKDOWN 2.8.2001

LANCE STORM v. KURT ANGLE in a (I guess) nontitle match - No title graphics, so I guess it's for PRAHD.
WWF SMACKDOWN 2.8.2001

Man, doesn't "Rat Race" look like it either belongs back in the 1970s or airing on ABC...in the 1970s?
WWF SMACKDOWN 2.8.2001

"SummerSlam is coming" - and Drowning Pool has already come and GONE
WWF SMACKDOWN 2.8.2001

Taker - Taker with a JUJIGATAME? That sure LOOKS like a cross armbreaker from the Dead Man - who knew?
WWF SMACKDOWN 2.8.2001

General shouting, rah rah mirth and merriment
WWF SMACKDOWN 9.8.2001

Test tells them (and the world) that if you mess with him, you're gonna eat his boot. But tonight's not aboot that, it's aboot celebrating...and he's gonna get them a table at the Viper Room. Gosh I hope nobody KILLS themselves.
WWF SMACKDOWN 9.8.2001

YIKES - FORMER WCW WORLD HEAVYWEIGHT CHAMPION DAVID ARQUETTE is in the crowd! Perhaps wisely, nobody mentions he's a former champion...
WWF SMACKDOWN 9.8.2001

Did you know that van Dam isn't contractually obligated to do the job until AT LEAST August, 2003? Why would I make that up?
WWF SMACKDOWN 9.8.2001

Did I mention Austin's wearing a WCW shirt? Well, what did you WANT me to do, figure out what the heck just happened between Palumbo, O'Haire and Austin or what it meant?
WWF SMACKDOWN 9.8.2001

NAPPY T & SHANE CAN'T DANCE are out...this entrance is transmitido en espanol SAP, by the way. Hey, guess who speaks first? That's right! The WHITE guy.
WWF SMACKDOWN 9.8.2001

Chimel says this match is for the "WCW tag team champions" but I think he meant something else.
WWF SMACKDOWN 9.8.2001

Ladies and gentlemen, we have new WCW tag team champions - and that SummerSlam match probably just became a unification bout. (4:48) I wonder what Totally Buffed think of all this.
WWF SMACKDOWN 9.8.2001

The RC cola rewind is Jericho putting a pie in Stephanie's face as two members of the Planet of the Apes watch - yuk yuk yuk
In a dressing room, Hugh Morrus and Stephanie have a shouting contest. Then Morrus attempts to clue us in to what his "WWF personality" is gonna be like by adding, "Hey, how do you think he made those monkeys do that, anyway?"
WWF SMACKDOWN 9.8.2001

Tag to Jeff SQUEEEEEAL hey Jeff take your damn baseball cap off, this ain't a BARN, doubleteam in the corner...
WWF SMACKDOWN 9.8.2001

...into the opposite corner but Jeff jumps to the top rope and flies off with the Gay in the Gay, knocking down Dudley!
WWF SMACKDOWN 9.8.2001

Dear Jesus, let there PLEASE be an "American Pie" movie made EVERY year so I can spend at least one month out of every year watching "American Pie" ads
WWF SMACKDOWN 9.8.2001

Don't know how much time has passed, but Bubba Ray is going up for the SENTON THAT NEVER, EVER LANDS - and....get ready...he MISSES!
WWF SMACKDOWN 9.8.2001

Hmmm...I'd'a called it a DQ, but I guess we'll call it (No contest 5:43 + 7:23) - my cutoff point was the Pillmaniser. Hmmm, strange that I would say that so many times on the night of the Pillman Memorial. Or WAS it all that strange?
WWF SMACKDOWN 9.8.2001

Let's see if Shane's upgraded his interview skills to match the set and graphics.
WWF SMACKDOWN 16.8.2001

Now, see what happens when you arrive late? Rock - is WALKING! - has missed ALL of that.
WWF SMACKDOWN 16.8.2001

Let's see...two segments...no sign of any wrestling yet. Maybe we were fooled by the liveness into thinking it *wouldn't* be just a pay-per-view infomercial?
WWF SMACKDOWN 16.8.2001

But before things escalate...a cheap ripoff of Mr. Perfect's music plays, which can only mean SHAWN STASIAK is out.
WWF SMACKDOWN 16.8.2001

(roll call: Crash, Hardcore Holly, Scotty 2 Hotty, Kai en tai, Spike Dudley, K-Kwik and Essa Rios - almost all wearing SummerSlam T-shirts: suckups)
WWF SMACKDOWN 16.8.2001

Here's your exterior - WOW WHAT A PARKING LOT!
WWF SMACKDOWN 16.8.2001

Stephanie, however, is still in the ring - Jericho is giving her a look (as if to say "damn, girl, I think absolutely EVERY wardrobe choice you made tonight is just so WRONG")
WWF SMACKDOWN 16.8.2001

From RAW, Taker and Kane use the cage and expose Palumbo and O'Haire for the frauds that they are
WWF SMACKDOWN 16.8.2001

Why is Heyman still wearing an Anarchy Rulz backstage pass? Talk about living in the past!
WWF SMACKDOWN 16.8.2001

OH NO THE GIANT FIST IS EXPLODING!
WWF SMACKDOWN 23.8.2001

Hardy says "hmm, we need the twelve foot high ladder in this match - I hope there's one under this ring" and WOW there it is.
WWF SMACKDOWN 23.8.2001

Austin grabs Stephanie's mic (GOD BLESS STONE COLD STEVE AUSTIN).
WWF SMACKDOWN 23.8.2001

Wow, we just burned a half hour outta this show.
WWF SMACKDOWN 23.8.2001

Rock finds the APA offices, studies the door - and then walks right around it (sacrilege!).
WWF SMACKDOWN 23.8.2001

"I'm proud of you, brother, the WCW title is finally where it needs to be." Amazingly, Faarooq fails to add "you know, I held that title eight years ago."
WWF SMACKDOWN 23.8.2001

Meanwhile, Edge is on the phone with Grandma Edna - Christian wants to talk to her, but she hangs up on him - that callous bitch.
WWF SMACKDOWN 23.8.2001

WWF Excess debuts Saturday at 10! Special Guest Host: Triple H! Will I recap it? Well.....ONCE
WWF SMACKDOWN 23.8.2001

Cole says that Rock will bring credibility back to the WCW title - just like a Ric Flair or a Ricky Steamboat. Gag me.
WWF SMACKDOWN 23.8.2001

Tazz shills Stacker 2 #2 - Say, does Tazz look particularly fat-burning to you?
WWF SMACKDOWN 23.8.2001

Let Us Take You Back to Earlier Tonight, where Jeff Hardy demolished a table with his body
Your hosts are MICHAEL KING COLE & TAZZZZZZZZZZ. Jeff Hardy has been diagnosed: it's ONLY bruised ribs. See, you can't *really* get hurt doing this...
WWF SMACKDOWN 23.8.2001

Man, I wish Buffy would come back from the dead already 'cause I sure am TIRED of all these ADS
WWF SMACKDOWN 30.8.2001

When we come back, Angle has made it to the parking lot...but there's no Austin to be found. Amazingly, Angle fails to ask the cameraman where Austin is...or might have gone. Looks like the car Austin was on is gone, too. Another car pulls in - Angle grabs the driver (Tommy Dreamer) and beats HIM up, instead. Hey, thanks for showing up tonight, Tommy!
WWF SMACKDOWN 30.8.2001

In case you can't believe the Rock just jobbed, watch this replay - then think to yourself that Rob van Dam *didn't* job, so it all falls into place...
WWF SMACKDOWN 30.8.2001

You ARE watching UPN - goodbye
WWF SMACKDOWN 30.8.2001

Kanyon with a ... ummm, I don't WHAT the heck THAT was - standing over one shoulder, hooking the other shoulder with his arm, then turning his entire body up and over, into a pinning predicament...and gets 2. Commentators, of course, can only come up with "nice!" to describe it (not that I've done any better).
WWF SMACKDOWN 30.8.2001

If you watch Hurricane's new entrance video, well, you WILL believe a boy can fly. Or maybe you won't.
WWF SMACKDOWN 30.8.2001

Angle calls for....some milk. Oh man. Rock regards his carton of milk...but opens it and toasts with Angle. If EITHER of those guys got ANY milk actually IN their mouths, I'd be surprised. Angle gets two more cartons of milk...man maybe this is like the GAY version of the EXTREME CUMSHOT OF THE CENTURY - smells like ratings!
WWF SMACKDOWN 30.8.2001




HELLO KITTY gang terrorizes city, family STICKERED to death!
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