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The 7 - Pro Wrestling - The Great Thomas SmackDown! Report 11-7-02
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The Great Thomas
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#1 Posted on 7.11.02 2059.59
Reposted on: 7.11.09 2100.51
Before anything I just wanna say: Goodbye, CRZ. We'll miss you. With that said, it's time for The Return of The Great Thomas SmackDown! Report!

Torrie/Kidman vs. Nidia/Noble: Nidia's gonna be on "Blind Date"? Hmmm... Anyway, Kidman wins via Shooting Star Press.

Survivor Series Main Event: I back out for two weeks, and I find out Big Show's gotten a giant push, and Brock's a TWEENER?! Geez!

Mr. Wilson: Dammit, he's still here!

Funaki et Cena et Rikishi: Cena still has his "Vanilla Ice" persona... and I LIKE IT! He and Rikishi should form a freestyling rap tag team! ...or mebbe not.

Rudos et Stephie: What's with the ugly green tights?

Rikishi vs. Cena: Tazz tries to freestyle... and fails miserably. Cena Ice wears ugly silver tights. OMG RIKISHI'S ASS IS HARD AS ROCK! Stink Face, and Rikishi wins via Rump-Shaker. He puts on the hat... FAT MAN DANCING!

Hardy et Moore: So now Moore is Daniel-san, and Matt is Pat Morita? Cool. I'm a huge Morita mark!

Mr. Wilson et Dawn Marie: OMG HE'S GONNA MARRY HER! NOOOOOOOOO!

Mr. Wilson et Dawn Marie: Tazz and Cole sum it up better than I can ever say. "What?" chants galore! Mr. Wilson wants to kill himself, I can tell. ACK! BARF! ECCH! PFFFFT! OMG HE SAID HE WAS GONNA KILL HIMSELF! I KNEW IT! OMG SHE SAID YES! NO! NO! NO! NO! NO! AAAAARGH!!! URP! ECCH! JEEZUM CROW! PFFFFT!

Big Show vs. Matt Hardy V.1: GOOD LORD! Matt scored 1330 on his SATs! I feel so stupid! Anyway, SQUAAAAAASH MAAAAATCH! Show's nose is bleeding! Hey, Matt! Did it taste like pork?

Angle/Benoit vs. Edge/Mysterio: PAREJAS TERRIBLES! Please note, this is a 2 out of 3 falls match, meaning I get tons of Angle/Benoit goodness! Edge/Rey-Rey gets the first fall via double-team. Angle wins Round 2 via Anklelock. Now it's time for commercial break!

Star Wars Episode II: It's on DVD! Yay!

Angle/Benoit vs. Edge/Mysterio (cont.): Rey-Rey gets in a Sunset Flip... OMG NEW TAG CHAMPS! LET'S GO TO COMMERCIAL BREAK!

Angle/Benoit vs. Edge/Mysterio (cont.): Brian Hebner continues the match. OMG NO NEW TAG CHAMPS! Edge hits a Spear... Flying Headbutt from Benoit on Angle... oops! OMG NEW TAG CHAMPS!

Guerrero vs. Lesnar: Coming up after commercial break! Damn, there are a lot of them today! Hmmm...

Guerrero vs. Lesnar (cont.): Remember when Tazz used to say: "The Mood Is About To Change"? Now his catchphrase is: "Here Comes The Pain!" Anyway, Lesnar wins via F5. Oh, and on record, he's still a tweener.

That's all for this week. Until then, Good Night, take care of yourselves, and I'm wondering what Ringmistress has to say about Mr. Wilson NOW!
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ScreamingHeadGuy
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#2 Posted on 7.11.02 2106.21
Reposted on: 7.11.09 2108.11
Great Thomas beats me again. When will I ever learn to type my stuff BEFORE the show?

To the people in Madison:
65,000 of you and all you could do was BREAK SOME WINDOWS? What gives?

To the people who didn't vote:
Screw you!

The belated thing to say:
CRZ...has...walked.

The fashion highlights:
Eddie's mullet is looking more like a ponytail now. Matt's pants...wow. The purple/yellow pastels look like.... Well, it's different. Angle's singlet is now half gold, and he's got gold stars on the flag-striped part. Rey's outfit was pink/black (w. shiny white). Oh, and Cena brought up that he has NEW boots every week (as if you didn't notice already).

The storylines:
Why was Steph watching her tape of the DeadCowMan/her kissing scene? I think we can all agree - only ONE wedding angle per year - please. Paul is becoming the domineering manager we all knew he could be; how long 'til Brocky has had enough of it (or will it be Paul who finally has enough?)

The wrestling:
The mixed tag was a nice way to open up. Cena/Rikishi seemed "jerky" with slow spots; good for some humor. The 2 of 3 match is the kind of thing that makes me happy to watch - I LOVE the "bonus" fourth fall. Brocky/Eddie was interresting; Brocky looked to come up lame at the end, but the announcers didn't say anything - hmmm.
The Great Thomas
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#3 Posted on 7.11.02 2108.57
Reposted on: 7.11.09 2112.15
Screaming Head Guy: About your avatar....

OMG! They made a SEQUEL to X-Change?! WOO-HOO!
ScreamingHeadGuy
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#4 Posted on 7.11.02 2112.07
Reposted on: 7.11.09 2112.30
All the hentai goodness you can stand...as a WOMAN! (although I played to get all the endings - I'm compulsive like that).
tomvejada
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#5 Posted on 7.11.02 2311.49
Reposted on: 7.11.09 2312.52
Random Smackdown Thoughts:

Cena rapped better than Rikishi.

Tazz and Cole burying that Al Wilson segment was gold.

More hilarity from Mattitude.

Paul Heyman was pretty good tonight.

That 2/3 falls match was awesome. I guess its Angle/Benoit at Survivor Series.

Undertaker's back next week. I don't mind just as long as he doesn't wrestle.

Cole and Tazz are miles ahead of JR and Lawler.

Lesnar/Guerrero was surprisingly good.

Overall, Smackdown was very good.
Excalibur05
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#6 Posted on 7.11.02 2330.10
Reposted on: 7.11.09 2337.54

    Originally posted by ScreamingHeadGuy
    Great Thomas beats me again. When will I ever learn to type my stuff BEFORE the show?

    To the people in Madison:
    65,000 of you and all you could do was BREAK SOME WINDOWS? What gives?




In our defense:

A. We were drunk
B. Some people stole some stuff.
C. We were drunk
D. Some people were using bike racks with BIKES STILL ON THEM as battering rams
E. We were drunk
F. The police started tear gassing us

Actually, I'm not really sure "we" applies here, as I celebrated Halloween on Thursday with the rest of the insane people on State Street. Though, I do live right on State, so I was able to watch the whole surreal ordeal from my (unbroken) window.

Uh...wrestling...right.

ALBERT IS A HOSS BY GOD!!!~~!
Ringmistress
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#7 Posted on 8.11.02 0951.27
Reposted on: 8.11.09 0951.54

    Originally posted by The Great Thomas
    Before anything I just wanna say: Goodbye, CRZ. We'll miss you. With that said, it's time for The Return of The Great Thomas SmackDown! Report!

    Torrie/Kidman vs. Nidia/Noble: Nidia's gonna be on "Blind Date"? Hmmm... Anyway, Kidman wins via Shooting Star Press.

    Survivor Series Main Event: I back out for two weeks, and I find out Big Show's gotten a giant push, and Brock's a TWEENER?! Geez!

    Mr. Wilson: Dammit, he's still here!

    Funaki et Cena et Rikishi: Cena still has his "Vanilla Ice" persona... and I LIKE IT! He and Rikishi should form a freestyling rap tag team! ...or mebbe not.

    Rudos et Stephie: What's with the ugly green tights?

    Rikishi vs. Cena: Tazz tries to freestyle... and fails miserably. Cena Ice wears ugly silver tights. OMG RIKISHI'S ASS IS HARD AS ROCK! Stink Face, and Rikishi wins via Rump-Shaker. He puts on the hat... FAT MAN DANCING!

    Hardy et Moore: So now Moore is Daniel-san, and Matt is Pat Morita? Cool. I'm a huge Morita mark!

    Mr. Wilson et Dawn Marie: OMG HE'S GONNA MARRY HER! NOOOOOOOOO!

    Mr. Wilson et Dawn Marie: Tazz and Cole sum it up better than I can ever say. "What?" chants galore! Mr. Wilson wants to kill himself, I can tell. ACK! BARF! ECCH! PFFFFT! OMG HE SAID HE WAS GONNA KILL HIMSELF! I KNEW IT! OMG SHE SAID YES! NO! NO! NO! NO! NO! AAAAARGH!!! URP! ECCH! JEEZUM CROW! PFFFFT!

    Big Show vs. Matt Hardy V.1: GOOD LORD! Matt scored 1330 on his SATs! I feel so stupid! Anyway, SQUAAAAAASH MAAAAATCH! Show's nose is bleeding! Hey, Matt! Did it taste like pork?

    Angle/Benoit vs. Edge/Mysterio: PAREJAS TERRIBLES! Please note, this is a 2 out of 3 falls match, meaning I get tons of Angle/Benoit goodness! Edge/Rey-Rey gets the first fall via double-team. Angle wins Round 2 via Anklelock. Now it's time for commercial break!

    Star Wars Episode II: It's on DVD! Yay!

    Angle/Benoit vs. Edge/Mysterio (cont.): Rey-Rey gets in a Sunset Flip... OMG NEW TAG CHAMPS! LET'S GO TO COMMERCIAL BREAK!

    Angle/Benoit vs. Edge/Mysterio (cont.): Brian Hebner continues the match. OMG NO NEW TAG CHAMPS! Edge hits a Spear... Flying Headbutt from Benoit on Angle... oops! OMG NEW TAG CHAMPS!

    Guerrero vs. Lesnar: Coming up after commercial break! Damn, there are a lot of them today! Hmmm...

    Guerrero vs. Lesnar (cont.): Remember when Tazz used to say: "The Mood Is About To Change"? Now his catchphrase is: "Here Comes The Pain!" Anyway, Lesnar wins via F5. Oh, and on record, he's still a tweener.

    That's all for this week. Until then, Good Night, take care of yourselves, and I'm wondering what Ringmistress has to say about Mr. Wilson NOW!



How about this... AAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH! Thank you. My stupid VCR couldn't get anything but the 2/3 falls match last night. I would've only taped the Wilson segment, just to hear Cole and Tazz tell it like it is. Oh, well, I'm just pissed because I couldn't tape Eddie and Chavo. My god, I haven't laughed that hard since the whole "La Bamba" promo with the Rock. I especially laughed when Eddie said that Brock couldn't beat Eddie Guererro! I liked how he ran just as he was saying his name, that almost made me lose my voice. So, who gives a damn about Mr. Wilson, I want me more Eddie and Chavo!

Ringmistress
LennyAaronRoxx
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#8 Posted on 8.11.02 1000.12
Reposted on: 8.11.09 1005.20
Smackdown was great, top to bottom...

The Al Wilson segment...man...I knew it was gonna be bad, but Cole and Tazz started on it, I couldn't stop laughing. Anything Eddie does is classic, "Brock Lesner cannot beat Eddie..." then bolts off...too funny. The 2/3 falls match is my candidate for Match of the Year.
tasslex
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#9 Posted on 8.11.02 1129.26
Reposted on: 8.11.09 1129.48
I thought every damn match on SD last night was excellent. I still cannot believe how good Torrie looks in the ring sometimes, she really looked like a wrestler last night.

The Cena/Rikishi match was hilarious, there's something about the way Cena moves and the way he hollers in the ring that really makes him fun to watch. And Rikishi's Ultra-White-Boy "WERD TO YOUR MOTHER" was legit ROFLOL funny.

And I still can't believe what they've done with Eddie, I used to HATE the guy until he started teaming with Chavo. Those two together are comedy GOLD.

And Tazz is the MASTER Color man right now, The King could use some time under HIS wing to really learn how to do it. What happened? Before he left due to that Stacy mess he was THE MAN.
Net Hack Slasher
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#10 Posted on 8.11.02 1755.34
Reposted on: 8.11.09 1757.18
-Kidman/Torrie v. Noble/Nidia- Real good opener, hey I'm a sucker for mix matches. Even though I don't think these girls are as solid as the girls on Raw the guys really stepped it up and made a good match... Little subtle difference between Raw & SD. On SD they always say guys fight the guys/ girls fight the girls. While on Raw the matches are intergender where anyone fights anyone. Wonder if they are doing it just to make the shows different even in a small way.

-Rikish v. Cena- Worst match of the night, sorry I can't stand seeing Rikish. He truly has work out his gimmick and his welcome. For me anyways

-Al Wilson/Dawn Marie- I am convinced they are trying to push Old Man Wilson as a sympathetic old man who just wants to find love but the fans are too dumb (or too smart) to take the bite... This is a segment that I'd put under so bad it was good. Ol' man wilson seems so out of his element in here but I find it so funny. Tazz and Cole were off the charts, they put it over perfectly. This storyline is insane ond over-the-top so call it like that. It was perfect.

-Big Show v. Matt Hardy - OH YEAHHHH, 'Matt hates cold weather'. Matt bit Big show's nose and drew blood WOW It's Mattibal Lecter.

-Edge/Mysterio v. Benoit/Angle- What can I write to about this to give it justice. 25 minutes of pure wrestling amazement. Is it to late to vote for this match for RSPW MOTY. Well I guess we have RSPW MOTY for 2003 (lol). Everything worked in that match. Plus the bonus fall. Big props to all involved. Except for Baby Hebner who kept getting in the way in the first 3 minutes.

-Brock v. Eddie- was disappointingly maybe because there was a lot of ad breaks in the last half hour but it didn't do much for me. Heck I liked Brock/Chuck from a few weeks ago better. Yikes can't believe I said that. Well I guess this week following that amazing tag match anything would be a let down.

-other stuff- Eddie/Chavo/Steph backstage, I didn't really know what was happening at the end of that segment but later on the announcers explained it that Eddie will cheat to win with Chavo so that's why he kept saying "WWEEEEE".. Matt Hardy backstage was amazing AGAIN. Shannon Moore is his first "M-F'er" and gets out the cheesy "twist of faith" line if Moore continues with his unhealthy sugar jones. Just too funny... Matt with Heyman saying who he'd take care of the Big Show and Heyman encouraging him saying he's great then going to the dressing room mumbling to himself. Brock getting pissed and trashing the TV with Heyman cowardly in the corner was cool.. Great interaction with Heyman & Brock at the end. With Heyman trying to reason with him saying he was "with him every step of the way and this is the way you repay me throwing me up against a wall." Heyman is so good.

Real great show backstage comedy to backstage seriousness. In ring greatness with 2/3 falls match and yes I even enjoyed Al Wilson/Dawn. Just the Rikishi match is the only thing I really hated. Even the greatness that is Mattitude made BigShow segment okay... Boy is Cole/ Tazz getting really comfortable with eachother. They are playing off each other pefectly. Good for them.

Line of the night: Old Man Wilson "If you say no I swear I'm going to kill myself"
Tazz: "Oh please say no Dawn"

redsoxnation
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#11 Posted on 8.11.02 1847.25
Reposted on: 8.11.09 1847.40
So, Matt scored 1330 on his SAT's. Unfortunately, he took them 5 times and that was his combined score. Sorry, had to do it.
Also, if your going to make Shannon Moore a Matt Hardy student, wouldn't it have made more sense for Big Slug to squash him instead of Matt, after Matt has finally received reaction from the fans. By squashing Moore, Big Slug goes over someone smaller, and it gives an excuse for Moore to move further along the course of Mattitude. Then, after Big Slug jobs at Survivor Series (please God, have him job, please), Matt can go over Big Slug, moving him up the ladder. By jobbing in a squash to Big Slug, Matt looks worse than his hanky wearing brother Jeff, who went over Big Slug a month ago.
DMC
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#12 Posted on 8.11.02 1856.54
Reposted on: 8.11.09 1859.02
I just have to say this somewhere, cause before last night I hadn't watched much WWE for a couple months, but Eddie Guerrero is absolute gold. The whole Latino Heat thing is so over the top it is hillarious, and you could just see Stephanie almost cracking up when he kept calling her "mommie". It was a really subtle moment in that promo, but I thought that was some of the funniest stuff I had seen in a long time. As a casual fan, I could totally appreciate it and see his promo and entertainment value very clearly. Eddie is great.

DMC
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