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The 7 - Pro Wrestling - Mark Henry
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Punkinhed
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#1 Posted on 5.10.02 1058.14
Reposted on: 5.10.09 1059.01


After watching Smackdown, I'd like everyone to give at least a small amount of respect to Mizark, because he HAS gotten better. Not by a great amount, he'll never be a Benoit, Angle or Rey, or an Edge or even a Kane, but he has made some recognizable progress. Even if it's the combination of the Heyman booking and the Eddie/Chavo magic, there has been some improvement. Personally I'd like to see him get a mini-feud with Chavo where Mark just "hulks out" and starts smashing Chavo. Kind of an "I've been holding back but now I won't" thing. Make it a submission match, with the idea that Chavo will have to wear down Henry, while Henry, being so much stronger, only has to hit Chavo a few times. You like? Even if you don't, will you agree that Mark has gotten a little better, or at least slightly entertaining?

On a side note, do you think he really DOES have to hold back? I mean, if he's near as strong as they make him out to be with those stunts, it would be pretty easy to hurt someone.
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Spaceman Spiff
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#2 Posted on 5.10.02 1247.14
Reposted on: 5.10.09 1247.15
Gotten better? Nope. Entertaining? Nope. I've seen no recognizable progress in him as a wrestler, and don't want him anywhere *near* Chavo in any kind of feud.

Mark Henry is u.s.e.l.e.s.s.
Fantomas
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#3 Posted on 5.10.02 1400.53
Reposted on: 5.10.09 1402.10
And what's the deal with his tights? He's got the planet earth woth fricking pink muscle arms flexing out of it..?!?

I didn't notice anything good or bad about henry, but remember if he did mess up anything it may have been edited out.

And wasn't he supposed to lose weight? He looks the same to me.

Kei Posiskunk
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#4 Posted on 5.10.02 1617.10
Reposted on: 5.10.09 1617.18
Mizark was sent down to OVW to lose weight, which he did, and supposed improved 1,000 times, especially during a few matches with D'Lo....but then that Ah-nuld's Strongest Man contest came up and Vince realized he could use it to hype Mizark's return, and had him start training again. In order to train, Mizark regained all the bulk he was sent to OVW to use in the first place. (since most "Strongmen" are all bulk, no definition, anyway)
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#5 Posted on 5.10.02 1718.39
Reposted on: 5.10.09 1720.52
Mark Henry is by far my least favorite active wrestler. He is in the bottom 5 in skills, bottom 5 in promos, and in the top 5 in sloppiness. Not a good combo.
Plus Mark Henry could suddenly be more skilled than Mysterio, Angle, and Benoit at the same time. Then get the heat skills of Flair, Austin, and Vince. Then get more charisma than Hogan or Rock. And do you know what you would have? The guy who got a blowjob from a drag queen, got an 80 year old pregnant with a dildo, and slept with his sister. So nothing Mark Henry could ever fix the fuck ups of his past character.
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#6 Posted on 5.10.02 1753.01
Reposted on: 5.10.09 1759.02
Well, I'll toss in my own opinion here. I dig Mizark, mainly because he's one of the few big guys actually getting some tv time in WWE. YEah, yeah, I like the Benoits, and Angles as much as anyone, but when it comes down to it, a smaller guy will never be as believable to me as an ass kicker as a big guy like Undertaker and Brock at one end of the spectrum and the Rikishis and Mark Henrys stuck in the midcard.

So, yeah, I think he's gotten better. I also think most people (here and elsewhere) unfairly shit on the guy because he's not a 5 foot 10 Canadian with a missing tooth. Get over it.
Spaceman Spiff
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#7 Posted on 5.10.02 1820.09
Reposted on: 5.10.09 1820.09
No, I shit on him because he can't sell, can't wrestle, can't talk, has no charisma, is slow & lumbering in the ring, and overall has no discernable worth as a pro wrestler.

Whether that's "unfair" or not, ::shrug::
redsoxnation
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#8 Posted on 5.10.02 2012.29
Reposted on: 5.10.09 2012.50

    Originally posted by EastCoastAvenger
    Well, I'll toss in my own opinion here. I dig Mizark, mainly because he's one of the few big guys actually getting some tv time in WWE. YEah, yeah, I like the Benoits, and Angles as much as anyone, but when it comes down to it, a smaller guy will never be as believable to me as an ass kicker as a big guy like Undertaker and Brock at one end of the spectrum and the Rikishis and Mark Henrys stuck in the midcard.

    So, yeah, I think he's gotten better. I also think most people (here and elsewhere) unfairly shit on the guy because he's not a 5 foot 10 Canadian with a missing tooth. Get over it.




I think its more due to his getting a ten year contract before he ever did anything in the ring, and the fact that his matches make me long for the return of the Giant Gonzales.
shea
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#9 Posted on 6.10.02 0034.19
Reposted on: 6.10.09 0039.48
... let's see .... he's a butt-ugly pudding of a man with no redeeming qualities as a wrestler, and he's on my TV screen for unwarranted minutes at a time?

In my house, we've got two words for you: Survivor, CSI.
Redhawk1810
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#10 Posted on 6.10.02 0047.01
Reposted on: 6.10.09 0053.01
I think Mark can get over despite his old characters. Wasn't it The Undertaker who murdered his parents, died and went to Heaven, and wanted to marry Stephanie McMahon? Wasn't it Kane who was supposed to be burned all over, and is Paul Bearer's son? Bad gimmicks can be overcome, but the fact is Mark's lack of perosnality and skill (except for lifting and bending things) will always hurt him. And, I hate to say it, but race doesn't help him out. A big redneck white guy who sucks has a better chance of getting over than a big Black guy who sucks.
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#11 Posted on 6.10.02 0128.09
Reposted on: 6.10.09 0129.02

    Originally posted by Spaceman Spiff
    No, I shit on him because he can't sell, can't wrestle, can't talk, has no charisma, is slow & lumbering in the ring, and overall has no discernable worth as a pro wrestler.

    Whether that's "unfair" or not, ::shrug::



Sounds like Andre the Giant!
Faust
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#12 Posted on 6.10.02 0257.12
Reposted on: 6.10.09 0259.01

    Originally posted by Redhawk1810
    I think Mark can get over despite his old characters. Wasn't it The Undertaker who murdered his parents, died and went to Heaven, and wanted to marry Stephanie McMahon?


hmmmm . . . I thought it was more of a manslaughter than a murder. I thought the story was that he intentionally started a fire that ended up unintentionally killing his parents and burning Kane.

I don't remember anything about dying and going to Heaven . . . but I could be wrong . . .

anyone else remember?

Net Hack Slasher
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#13 Posted on 6.10.02 0321.52
Reposted on: 6.10.09 0323.24
    Originally posted by Faust
    I don't remember anything about dying and going to Heaven . . . but I could be wrong . . .

    anyone else remember.



It was at a Royal Rumble 94 vs. Yokozuna in a casket match. A bunch of heels jumped him and locked him in a casket the started rolling the casket out and it started smoking, they had a casket-cam and showed him dead on the screen above the entrance. He was dead I tell you! But then all of a sudden HIS EYES OPENED, and he said he would not job to death! and comeback at a future time to get his heat back. Then some funky stuff happened to the screen and traced his image and then exploded and then he was raised up to the heavens (or atleast to the top of the rafters) buh-gawd but not necessary "By God".

As for Mark Henry personally he's a lot less annoying then Rikishi. Actually I don't mind Mark too much, if he stays as resident lower-midcard guy. I have been hating his matches a lot less recently



(edited by Net Hack Slasher on 6.10.02 0423)
Ana Ng
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#14 Posted on 6.10.02 0328.57
Reposted on: 6.10.09 0329.01
Mark Henry sucks. SUCKS. He's not interesting, and my god people, he slept with his sister!

Actually, on the note of his past horrifying storylines, did you ever get the impression that the people in charge were sitting around one day, and one person said, "You know who will do ANYTHING we tell him to do? Mark Henry!" and then another person said "Nuh-uh! He wouldn't do *anything*" and the first guy said "You wanna bet?", so then they had him get a blowjob from a transvetite, give a speech about being a sex addict, make a stinky poop on GTV, tell his therapist on camera that he lost it to his sister, and still routinely does his sister, hook up with Mae Young and impregnate her with a big fake hand? And then the doubting guy was like "Ok, you're right. Mark Henry WILL do anything! Drinks are on me!"
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#15 Posted on 6.10.02 0518.54
Reposted on: 6.10.09 0519.48
And worst of all, his matches.

He'll spend anywhere from 60% to 90% of the match dominating his opponent, only to lose the whole thing after taking one to two good hits. Henry Vs. Storm was a great example of this. Lance Storm landed maybe three solid offensive moves in the whole match, but he effectively knocked Henry out.
Punkinhed
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#16 Posted on 6.10.02 1135.38
Reposted on: 6.10.09 1135.43



Ah, so you'd feel better if he beat Lance Storm? Look at it this way, if they build him up as a powerhouse guy, and someone beats him, that's supposed to make them more impressive. I do feel sorry for his past storylines, it has to be hard to get credibility with an albatross like that around his neck. A lot of wrestlers have had stupid gimmicks and come back from them. Of course, they had more ability and talent than Mark does; I'll be the first to admit he's not the best, or even in the top ten. Net Hack was right: he should stay as a lower-midcarder.

How about this as a compromise: he fits and does the "strong guy" wrestler niche pretty well, and he has had some impressive and interesting spots. He's not incredibly talented, but he could be a lot worse (or he could dance and smash his ass into people).

Incidentally, saying he's slow and lumbering is silly. Of course he is, but so what? So's Kane. So's the Undertaker. So's Rikishi. So what? I'd prefer them to give him spots that showcase his strengths as opposed to showing his weaknesses, like his promos. And I'd enjoy seeing him as a big bullying heel, just for the hell of it.
Spaceman Spiff
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#17 Posted on 6.10.02 1348.49
Reposted on: 6.10.09 1349.15

    Originally posted by Punkinhed
    Incidentally, saying he's slow and lumbering is silly. Of course he is, but so what? So's Kane. So's the Undertaker. So's Rikishi. So what? I'd prefer them to give him spots that showcase his strengths as opposed to showing his weaknesses, like his promos. And I'd enjoy seeing him as a big bullying heel, just for the hell of it.

Well, I'm the one who said he's slow & lumbering, so I'll address this. I don't like Kane or Taker or Rikishi, either (although I was kinda digging Grumpy Old Man Taker). As for showcasing his strengths, then only show him backstage bending stuff. I'd enjoy it if Henry never showed up on my TV again, though.

And, just to show I'm not being an elitist or anything, I mark for Chuck Palumbo, Johnny the Bull, and Hugh Morrus.
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#18 Posted on 6.10.02 1848.59
Reposted on: 6.10.09 1849.19

    Originally posted by Punkinhed



    Ah, so you'd feel better if he beat Lance Storm? Look at it this way, if they build him up as a powerhouse guy, and someone beats him, that's supposed to make them more impressive. I do feel sorry for his past storylines, it has to be hard to get credibility with an albatross like that around his neck. A lot of wrestlers have had stupid gimmicks and come back from them. Of course, they had more ability and talent than Mark does; I'll be the first to admit he's not the best, or even in the top ten. Net Hack was right: he should stay as a lower-midcarder.

    How about this as a compromise: he fits and does the "strong guy" wrestler niche pretty well, and he has had some impressive and interesting spots. He's not incredibly talented, but he could be a lot worse (or he could dance and smash his ass into people).

    Incidentally, saying he's slow and lumbering is silly. Of course he is, but so what? So's Kane. So's the Undertaker. So's Rikishi. So what? I'd prefer them to give him spots that showcase his strengths as opposed to showing his weaknesses, like his promos. And I'd enjoy seeing him as a big bullying heel, just for the hell of it.






The 'strong guy' gimmick really did wonders for Ted Arcidi and Bill Kazmeier. It must be a rule, you get introduced as the world's strongest man, and you end up sucking. For further examples, look at Dino Bravo before and after he bulked up.
Faust
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#19 Posted on 6.10.02 2229.02
Reposted on: 6.10.09 2229.19

    Originally posted by Net Hack Slasher
      Originally posted by Faust
      I don't remember anything about dying and going to Heaven . . . but I could be wrong . . .

      anyone else remember.



    It was at a Royal Rumble 94 vs. Yokozuna in a casket match.



Ah yes, I remember now. That horrible affair. Yep. I had blocked it from my memory until now . . .
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#20 Posted on 6.10.02 2244.26
Reposted on: 6.10.09 2245.11
Ok, I know I'm going to regret asking this, but what's the deal with Mark Henry sleeping with his sister? That must have been during the year I didn't watch wrestling because I didn't own a television.
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