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The 7 - Random - Coming Attractions? Cover your eyes!
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Summer sausage
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#1 Posted on 13.6.02 1242.31
Reposted on: 13.6.09 1259.02
This is a rant that I've wanted to get out of my system for a while now, so sit back and enjoy the bile.

As I just said in the Scooby Doo thread, the point of the Coming Attractions trailer is to get you to want to see the movie, no? It lets you know 1. that a good movie is being released soon; 2. who stars in it; 3. what kind of movie it is. When I was a kid the Coming Attractions were just as entertaining as the Featured Attraction, if not moreso.

Not anymore.

Like everyone else in Hollywood these days, the people responsible for the trailers are retarded. And that is insulting the mentally challenged of the world. They don't give us a taste of the movie anymore ... they give us three full courses and dessert afterwards.

The first movie I can remember being ruined for me by the trailer was What About Bob? I remember laughing my ass off at the trailer, lining up to see the movie, and then being pretty disappointed by it. Why? Because some genius had put EVERY FUNNY JOKE FROM THE MOVIE INTO THE TRAILER! I was sitting there, watching the movie, ticking off the jokes I had already seen. "Yup, there's Dreyfuss wigging out ... there's Murray jogging with the car behind him ..."

Now it is costing the movie companies my dollars. I remember seeing the trailer for Spy Game, starring Brad Pitt and Robert Redford. It looked really good. But the trailer kept going on and on and on. It showed me the whole fucking movie -- Redford is a CIA agent who enlists and trains Pitt. But Pitt gets captured in Beirut and Redford has to save him. Wait, I was wrong ... when I finally saw it at a friend's house, it turns out he gets captured in China.

And now ... the new Robert De Niro movie. De Niro plays a veteran homicide cop whose son is accused of murder. Fine, I'm sold ... stop telling me more! But, just from the trailer, I can tell you that 1. De Niro believes his son to be innocent; 2. he quits the force; 3. goes on his own to protect his son and find the real killer. There goes THREE vital plot points that I don't WANT to know going into the theatre. I don't WANT to know that he believes his son is innocent. I don't WANT to know that he quits the force.

Jesus' this is a simple point but the monkeys who are paid to entertain me completely miss it. It's actually gotten to the point where I close my eyes and cover my ears during the Coming Attractions. Don't I feel like a winner when I'm doing that.

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#2 Posted on 13.6.02 1326.27
Reposted on: 13.6.09 1329.01
I completely agree with you on this point. It's managed to kill many comedies by putting all the actual funny bits in the commercials, and then there's nothing to laugh at when you see the actual movie. However, it's even worse during action/suspense movies when they show you the freakin' end fo the movie! Take The Perfect Storm for example. Even though it's based on a true story, and if you read anything about it, you know how it ends, there's still a lot of suspense in the movie about how the boat is going to fare, and how they actually go down. Well it doesn't help when they show you the boat trying to go up the giant 100 ft wave during the previews. Then you KNOW it can't end until you at least see that part.

And then you have the current worst offender, The Sum of All Fears. Now I haven't seen the movie, but I have read the book, and what I was looking for in the previews was something to get me interested in seeing how they did it on the big screen. (Parts of the book were very, very, boring). I was not looking for the END of the freaking movie in the previews. WHAT the hell? Even if you have never read the book and don't realize that they're showing you the end, as you watch the movie you can only sit there and think, "Well I haven't seen this scene yet, so it must be a part of the climax of the movie..." and that just ruins the whole damn thing.


Oh and don't get me started on lines like "Let's get jinky with it!" from the Scooby Doo preview. It probably would've been funny hearing it once during the movie, but now that I've heard it a dozen times during the previews, all it gets from me is groans.
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#3 Posted on 13.6.02 1331.55
Reposted on: 13.6.09 1340.02
I completely agree that there are movies where all the funny parts are in the trailers. I have been burned so many times by movie trailers that hook me, and then I get to watch two hours of crap.
Tomcats was awful, because nothing in that movie was funny except for some of the jokes that were in the previews. This is also the case with Corky Romano, and the biggest offender was Freddy Got Fingered. The mental image of Tom Green playing a piano with sausages attached by wires is at least original and funny to look at. Little did I know that the movie itself would have exactly ONE laugh in it and would be the worst movie I have seen since Mars Attacks.
So I feel for you, but I also hate trailers that don't show you anything. Why can't there be a happy medium?
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#4 Posted on 13.6.02 1337.00
Reposted on: 13.6.09 1353.27
Actually, this is nothing that new. Not too long ago, I picked up the DVD for "The Abominable Dr. Phibes," an early-70s horror flick. The plot is simple: Vincent Price returns from the grave to kill nine doctors (who failed to save his wife's life) in Biblical plague-ish ways.

The DVD contains the trailer for the film... which goes for about two minutes or so, and SHOWS EVERY MURDER IN THE MOVIE.

Every one.

Dr Unlikely
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#5 Posted on 13.6.02 1355.05
Reposted on: 13.6.09 1357.42
I do appreciate when movie trailers include lines bad enough that you know immediatley that you never have to see this movie, be it in theaters, on video or on cable. The best current one - and maybe an all-timer - is "Bad Company". Chris Rock gets to say "My twin brother was CIA?!" and right there, you know everything you need to about how bad the plot and dialogue are going to be. Perfect summation and exposition, money saved.
Parts Unknown
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#6 Posted on 13.6.02 1410.14
Reposted on: 13.6.09 1423.47
Yeah, I hate this stuff too, but it really doesn't matter to most people. The first time I saw the preview for Spider-man, I laughed out loud when Aunt May said, "You're not Superman, you know." It was funny. Teehee. But after seeing the preview a zillion times, the line lost its zip.
But, lo and behold, when I finally saw the movie, I bet every person in the theater laughed at that line except me. WTF? They HAD to have seen the previews.
Another bad example of this problem is Double Jeopardy - the preview showed Ashley Judd confronting her husband in the film's climax. They totally blew their load.
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#7 Posted on 13.6.02 1410.25
Reposted on: 13.6.09 1424.35

On one hand, explicit (in terms of plot, not content) trailers are a bad thing. But, if I can see all I need to see of a movie in 2 minutes, that just means I don't have to see it.

One of my friends is so "anti-spoiler" that he actually will shut his eyes and cover his ears during trailers of films he wants to see badly, like Royal Tenenbaums or Austin Powers Cubed (the two for which that I know he has done this).
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#8 Posted on 13.6.02 1739.33
Reposted on: 13.6.09 1741.12

    Originally posted by Torchslasher
    Tomcats was awful, because nothing in that movie was funny except for some of the jokes that were in the previews. This is also the case with Corky Romano,

Oh, COME ON now. You're not really suggesting that there was anything funny about Corky Romano, are you?

(When I feel down, I close my eyes and imagine Chris Kattan finding out the hard way how Vlad the Impaler got his name, and then I feel better.)
Mr Heel II
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#9 Posted on 13.6.02 2319.14
Reposted on: 13.6.09 2322.13

    Originally posted by Parts Unknown
    The first time I saw the preview for Spider-man, I laughed out loud when Aunt May said, "You're not Superman, you know." It was funny. Teehee. But after seeing the preview a zillion times, the line lost its zip.
    But, lo and behold, when I finally saw the movie, I bet every person in the theater laughed at that line except me. WTF? They HAD to have seen the previews.

That's something that drove me nuts about "Zoolander". The trailer is milked for all its worth in the theatres and on the ad campaign. They focus on one or two funny lines. So you get to the theatre and you've heard said funny lines about a hundred times, and THOSE are the lines the rest of the crowd laughs LOUDEST at. It's like they're trained!

My vote for trailer that gave more of the movie away than any other, hands down, is "Castaway".
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#10 Posted on 14.6.02 0048.43
Reposted on: 14.6.09 0059.06
"Castaway" gave away about as much as, "The Score". The trailer tells you up front that Edward Norton will betray De Niro, AND that he won't get away with it.
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#11 Posted on 14.6.02 1423.38
Reposted on: 14.6.09 1424.05
What I've noticed about trailers.

The 2-5 minute version you first see in the theater is good to see just ONCE and many months before so you don't memorize scenes. Then skip out on all the 1-2 minute trailers, 30 second TV spots, and late night TV promos. And by all means ignore the Making Of specials until after you see the movie.

Starting last year, I tried the covering the eyes and ears thing on trailers outside the very first one and it's worked quite well. Spiderman was one of the few movies I got away with watching absolutely no trailers and enjoyed immensely. I did the same for Star Wars Episode 2, but the Yoda scene on TV got me.

On the other hand, my friend, who saw all the trailers on the Internet, kept telling me "trailer" throughout the Star Wars movie. I guess nothing surprised him. And if you're intent on watching it several times anyways, trailers are no big deal.

Scorpion King almost worked but the interviews with the Rock spoiled several major action scenes. Cast Away was a major offender in the spoiler trailers so it took me a year or two before I would agree to see it.

I'm not sure whether reading the book before the movie is better or vice versa. Any opinions?

Hmm, what's been a good recent trailer? Minority Report?
At least they don't tell you the climax there.

I have NO desire to see Men In Black 2.
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#12 Posted on 14.6.02 2252.17
Reposted on: 14.6.09 2255.22
Since I have two young children, I don't remember the last movie I saw in the cinema so I really can't comment on trailers spoiling movies because I generally don't see them until they make their way to cable. However, I do have an opinion on Zoggy's next to last question. As a general rule of thumb, if I have read the book, I'm not going to see the movie because it will be horrific in comparison to the book. If I have seen the movie, I probably will go read the book. Of course, my genre of choice is SF/Fantasy and I have a "small" collection (I spent last weekend building a 6' by 8' bookcase and filling it up while still having at least two boxes of books that haven't been unpacked.) so I have already read most of the material that is likely to be adapted to the screen. The only exceptions to that rule that readily come to mind are "The Princess Bride", "2001: A Space Odyssey", and "Destination Moon". Other than those three, IIRC, every SF adaptation of the last 30 years has sucked in ways previously unbeknownst to man.

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#13 Posted on 14.6.02 2312.21
Reposted on: 14.6.09 2319.31
Hearts in atlantis....

great book....

great acting in the movie...

but any similarties between the book and movie are greatly exaggrated...

wow, they compleatly missed the heart of the book in that movie, but Hopkins rules...
Fuzzy Logic
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#14 Posted on 14.6.02 2329.59
Reposted on: 14.6.09 2330.15
I haven't seen Hearts in Atlantis, nor do I think I will anytime soon (not fond of movies based on books that i've already read). but isn't the movie basically the first section (which is pretty much a nice advertisement for the dark tower series, plus part of a good story) of the book with a tad too much mutilation of the actual stuff?
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#15 Posted on 15.6.02 0038.42
Reposted on: 15.6.09 0039.58
I'm a big fan of reading the book first. I've always thought seeing the movie then reading the book is anticlimatic as you already know what's going to happen...
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#16 Posted on 15.6.02 1722.11
Reposted on: 15.6.09 1729.03
I'm more a fan of the short teaser, eg. The Hulk teaser they're playing with Spiderman. You don't see the hulk, he doesn't do anything, etc. But now I'm dying to see the movie from that little teaser.

No doubt that in the months leading up to the release(Summer 2003) there will be full trailers with all the good stuff spoiled.
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