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The 7 - Random - Scooby Doo: The Worst Movie Ever?
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Big Bad
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#1 Posted on 13.6.02 0047.50
Reposted on: 13.6.09 0055.25
I'm not usually one to prejudge a movie before it comes out, but come on. It stars Buffy, Mr. Bean and Freddie friggin' Prinze. I think the CGI dog is a better actor than Prinze, for crying out loud. Who thought up this casting? The guy that plays Shaggy seems to have it down, but one out of four ain't good. To top it off, the girl that plays Velma is WORLDS better looking than Sarah Michelle Anorexia Geller. This isn't exactly a bad thing, but it's just wrong! Cartoon Daphne was so hot! She can't be outshown by Velma, for crying out loud!

Any movie that makes me exclaim "for crying out loud" so many times is doomed to failure.
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#2 Posted on 13.6.02 0051.09
Reposted on: 13.6.09 0055.28
I'm not going to argue with most of your statement, but the fact that having Rowan Atkinson in a film is something you see as a bad thing means you have never seen "Black Adder", one of the four best British comedy shows ever, in which Rowan plays a character so delightfully malevolent and evil it was mindboggling to see him as Mr. Bean after that.
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#3 Posted on 13.6.02 0133.12
Reposted on: 13.6.09 0149.26

    Originally posted by spf2119
    I'm not going to argue with most of your statement, but the fact that having Rowan Atkinson in a film is something you see as a bad thing means you have never seen "Black Adder", one of the four best British comedy shows ever, in which Rowan plays a character so delightfully malevolent and evil it was mindboggling to see him as Mr. Bean after that.


word...Blackadders 2 and 3 are my favs...

the pure evil of #2, and the wit of #3 are a delight...

plus i never get sick of Blackadder, i have the 1-5 dvd collection, but Mr. Bean on the other hand...
vsp
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#4 Posted on 13.6.02 0830.25
Reposted on: 13.6.09 0836.30
Okay, let's work backwards in Rowan's filmography:

Scooby Doo: the movie that one AIC talkbacker aptly described by saying "I would rather watch an 80 minute monkey shit fight than see this movie."

Rat Race: "Let's take It's A Mad, Mad, Mad, Mad World, and remake it in a way that carefully extracts all of the humor of the original."

Maybe Baby: Ben Elton's biggest misfire.

Bean: Essentially three thirty-minute "Mr. Bean" TV episodes stitched together into a full-length feature. Not that there's anything wrong with the TV series, but this wasn't really anything new.

Full Throttle: haven't seen it myself.

So as talented as he is, we have to go back to Four Weddings and a Funeral (1994) to find a good movie that he's in. (Of course, one is one more than Freddie Prinze Jr. can claim. Just saying.)

As for Scooby, "worst movie ever?" Hardly -- it won't even be the worst movie this YEAR. (Sorority Boys! Ya-Ya Sisterhood! Crossroads! Juwanna Mann! Enough! Rollerball! And that's not even speculating about the upcoming horrors of The Country Bears or the Crocodile Hunter movie.) Scooby will be BAD, but there's bad and then there's major-organ-failure levels of bad...



(edited by vsp on 13.6.02 0639)
Papercuts!
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#5 Posted on 13.6.02 0846.00
Reposted on: 13.6.09 0859.02

    Originally posted by vsp
    Scooby Doo: the movie that one AIC talkbacker aptly described by saying "I would rather watch an 80 minute monkey shit fight than see this movie."
As an aside, with respect, using an AICN talkbacker as a source shoots your credibility all to hell. Heck, using AICN as a source shoots your credibility all to hell. Fat Fuck Harry Knowles is given to histrionics and pushing his own personal agenda -- sure the movie looks bad, but he has a pathological hatred of Freddie Prinze (whom I have no love for either and who's celebrity baffles me) and Matthew Lillard -- the latter of which caused Roger Ebert to openly mock him when Fat Fuck panned a movie (SLC Punk) simply because it STARRED Lillard. Really, who else uses their movie website to openly solicit gifts for his sister's illegitimate baby? Who else goes on a MOVIE sight and BEGS for "Pwesents" on his birthday? Who else makes totally unsubstantiated claims about their knowledge of EVERYTHING (which is obviously and openly false and incorrect) in order to look cool? For God's sake, the guy totally missed the fact that Jay and Silent Bob Strike Back was also talking about HIM!

That said, an 80-minute monkey shit fight would be one of the funniest things on the planet EVER. Seriously. How could you NOT laugh at that?

Not only is SMG one of the most foul actresses (looking and acting -- her hair looks like it would break off if you touched it because it's been dyed so much) in Hollywood, she's also a mental giant. Recently, she was quoted as saying that Buffy The Vampire Slayer wouldn't work as a movie. But I'm sure she's really a nice person.

And while Scooby Doo is obviously another in a string of bad ideas brought to the screen and then horribly multilated (I'm looking at you Avengers starring Ralph Fiennes and Uma Thurman) I doubt it's the worst movie of all time. I mean, really, Scooby-Doo has always been pretty f'n stupid -- a movie like Independence Day is far more offensive in it's contents and its attempt to be "Science Fiction."

Okay, I'm done. Sorry about that.
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#6 Posted on 13.6.02 0856.32
Reposted on: 13.6.09 0859.04

Well, I've been told that Rat Race isn't that bad. I've not seen it, but that comes a friend of mine whose taste is usually as snooty as mine.

That said, Scooby Doo is a train wreck waiting to happen.

As for worse movies, I can think of something I saw this weekend, that had the word "clones" in the title.

I'm sure Scooby Doo won't have 50 camera wipes or irises in it.

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#7 Posted on 13.6.02 0902.22
Reposted on: 13.6.09 0907.18

    Originally posted by odessasteps
    As for worse movies, I can think of something I saw this weekend, that had the word "clones" in the title.
You saw "The Clones?" OMG! My parents actually saw that about 25 years ago in its original screening! They said the film was so bad, people were heckling it (or they were MSTing it before there was an MST3K) and the audience was getting a bigger kick out of the heckling than they were the film. There's one scene with a guy in a phone booth and a midget comes up and taps on the glass. One of the audience members yelled "Let him in! He just wants to make a short call!"
Nate The Snake
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#8 Posted on 13.6.02 1000.58
Reposted on: 13.6.09 1001.06
    Originally posted by odessasteps

    Well, I've been told that Rat Race isn't that bad. I've not seen it, but that comes a friend of mine whose taste is usually as snooty as mine.



I enjoyed Rat Race. Yeah, it's pretty much "Mad, Mad, Mad, Mad, Mad World" all over again, but if you're gonna rip something off, make it something good. I like a good, mindless, slapstick-fest now and again, and Rat Race did that very nicely, I thought. Although, maintaining a tenuous link to the original subject through Mr. Atkinson, he wasn't my favorite character by a long shot. Seth Green and his mute brother were MUCH more entertaining.

(edited by Nate The Snake on 13.6.02 1001)
evilwaldo
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#9 Posted on 13.6.02 1138.18
Reposted on: 13.6.09 1139.21
WHO IS DISSING BLACK ADDER????????

A pox on your first born.
vsp
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#10 Posted on 13.6.02 1207.54
Reposted on: 13.6.09 1209.13

    Originally posted by Papercuts!

    As an aside, with respect, using an AICN talkbacker as a source shoots your credibility all to hell. Heck, using AICN as a source shoots your credibility all to hell. Fat Fuck Harry Knowles is given to histrionics and pushing his own personal agenda -- sure the movie looks bad, but he has a pathological hatred of Freddie Prinze (whom I have no love for either and who's celebrity baffles me) and Matthew Lillard -- the latter of which caused Roger Ebert to openly mock him when Fat Fuck panned a movie (SLC Punk) simply because it STARRED Lillard.



Two responses:

1) Fat Fuck Harry Knowles didn't provide the line I quoted: a talkbacker did. Did I say "An AICN talkbacker bashed it, so it must actually suck?" No, I didn't. I merely quoted him because it was, frankly, a great one-liner. The fact that Scooby Doo does, in fact, actually suck should be self-evident.

2) If we're going to tear apart Rowan Atkinson's filmography, why not tear apart Lillard's?

* Scooby Doo - Lillard's performance is one of the few bright spots in the film, according to most (non-AICN) reviews I've read.

* Summer Catch - SKREEEEEEEEEEEEEEECK! Let us move on.

* Thirteen Ghosts - EASILY one of the worst movies of the decade. Execrable. The movie made "Jeepers Creepers" look like a Hitchcock film.

* Love's Labour's Lost - Kenneth Branagh wanks on Shakespeare and WE GET TO WATCH. He could've stopped after Much Ado About Nothing, which was pleasant enough, but nooooooooo.

* SLC Punk - not a bad movie, albeit depressing. I went back and dug up Knowles's review, just for reference, and didn't find it to be all that unfair. He says up front "I don't HATE Lillard; however, I quickly found that he just wasn’t performing characters that I enjoyed on screen," made a great point about how a flashback scene could've been developed further, and basically sums it up as "Lillard's character dominates the film; if you like Lillard as an actor, you'll like this film, else you probably won't." (For my money, BTW, Lillard was perfectly adequate in the role.)

* Senseless - NEXT!

* Wing Commander - SKREEEEEEEEEEEEEEECK! Let us move on.

* The Curve - NEXT!

* She's All That - NEXT!

* Scream - I may be one of four people who'd say this, but I didn't like it. It scares me that this launched the career of Neve Campbell, who has all the acting range of a chained-up dog on a two-foot leash.



    That said, an 80-minute monkey shit fight would be one of the funniest things on the planet EVER. Seriously. How could you NOT laugh at that?



I'd laugh at it, AND buy the DVD. Nobody's debating THAT.



    And while Scooby Doo is obviously another in a string of bad ideas brought to the screen and then horribly multilated (I'm looking at you Avengers starring Ralph Fiennes and Uma Thurman) I doubt it's the worst movie of all time.



Which is what I said.
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#11 Posted on 13.6.02 1215.48
Reposted on: 13.6.09 1218.24
Point one: I don't think Nate was dissing Blackadder, evilwaldo, I think he was dissing the character Rowan "comic god" Atkinson played in Rat Race.

Point two: Attack of the Clones is probably a worse movie than Scooby Doo, if only for the fact that the history and potential for awesomeness is there, but completely squandered by Lucas. I've got a tear in my eye right now thinking about it. Scooby Doo at best could have been a funny summer movie that you would forget about ten minutes after leaving the theatre.

Point three: Scooby Doo may not be the worst movie ever, but it may have the worst trailer ever. The point of the Coming Attractions trailer is to make you want to see the movie, no? Most Hollywood trailers make mediocre movies look good. This one is so actively bad, so horrible, that the movie itself must be ten times worse.

Point four: I don't have a point four.


Papercuts!
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#12 Posted on 13.6.02 1218.19
Reposted on: 13.6.09 1219.15

    Originally posted by vsp

    Two responses:

    1) Fat Fuck Harry Knowles didn't provide the line I quoted: a talkbacker did.

I think you're getting confused, vsp. I did start my whole diatribe out with "with respect" meaning it was directed to you. I just wanted to rant on AICN a tad. At any rate, you're right. FF didn't provide the quote, which is why I said "using an AICN talkbacker as a source shoots your credibility all to hell." I'm just trying to help you out.
    Originally posted by vsp
    The fact that Scooby Doo does, in fact, actually suck should be self-evident.
Never in doubt.
    Originally posted by vsp
    2) If we're going to tear apart Rowan Atkinson's filmography, why not tear apart Lillard's?
This has nothing to do with me. I couldn't care one way or the outher about Atkinson. Heck, I'm not a fan of Lillard myself. So go right ahead.
    Originally posted by vsp
    I went back and dug up Knowles's review, just for reference, and didn't find it to be all that unfair.
Did you dig up the one from when he was on "At the Movies" with Roger Ebert? That's the one I was referring to. I should have been more clear. At any rate, Ebert, IIRC, blasts Harry who outright dismissed the film "Because Matthew Lillard is in it" on national television.
    Originally posted by vsp
    Which is what I said.
Right. And I agreed with you. See. There's plenty of love to go around.
vsp
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#13 Posted on 13.6.02 1222.56
Reposted on: 13.6.09 1227.30
    Originally posted by Papercuts!
    Did you dig up the one from when he was on "At the Movies" with Roger Ebert? That's the one I was referring to. I should have been more clear. At any rate, Ebert, IIRC, blasts Harry who outright dismissed the film "Because Matthew Lillard is in it" on national television.


Nope, I dug up the original text review on AICN. I didn't know that Knowles had ever been on Ebert's show -- it's hard for me to believe that both of them would fit on-screen at the same time. How far back did they have to pull the camera?


(edited by vsp on 13.6.02 1023)
Papercuts!
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#14 Posted on 13.6.02 1225.56
Reposted on: 13.6.09 1229.02

    Originally posted by vsp
    Nope, I dug up the original text review on AICN. I didn't know that Knowles had ever been on Ebert's show -- it's hard for me to believe that both of them would fit on-screen at the same time. How far back did they have to pull the camera?
LMAO. When my better half and I were preparing to go to the San Diego Comic-Con International last summer, I told her that Knowles regularly attends. She turned to me and matter-of-factly asked "How is that possible? Does he have someone there to keep him wet all the time?"
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#15 Posted on 13.6.02 1238.10
Reposted on: 13.6.09 1252.35

    Originally posted by Big Bad
    I'm not usually one to prejudge a movie before it comes out, but come on. It stars Buffy, Mr. Bean and Freddie friggin' Prinze. I think the CGI dog is a better actor than Prinze, for crying out loud. Who thought up this casting? The guy that plays Shaggy seems to have it down, but one out of four ain't good. To top it off, the girl that plays Velma is WORLDS better looking than Sarah Michelle Anorexia Geller. This isn't exactly a bad thing, but it's just wrong! Cartoon Daphne was so hot! She can't be outshown by Velma, for crying out loud!

    Any movie that makes me exclaim "for crying out loud" so many times is doomed to failure.



Perhaps, but I think the movie could be redeeming if Shaggy says the following line after being told to investigate somewhere with Scooby while Freddy gets to keep Daphne and Velma around:

"I really love you guys, don't get me wrong it's all about (thumps heart). But for the first time, I'm 18 and I can finally say, FUUUUUUUUCK YOUUUUUU!"

One can hope, right?
ICEMAN
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#16 Posted on 13.6.02 1259.17
Reposted on: 13.6.09 1259.18
I'm a huge SMG mark and I feel bad about this one.She has been in some bad movies I'll admit it,but this one I'm not gonna go see.


It's gonna be bad you can tell just by the previews but not Lost in Space bad or Howard the Duck bad.Matthew Lillard not that bad of an actor,he out of the whole cast looks most like the character.

Shaggy:He's perfect with the voice and clothes and everthing.

Fred:In the cartoon,he's HHH and in the movie he's X-Pac.

Daphne:As stated above,I'm a SMG mark but they should have got someone a little "thicker" bodywise than her because Daphne isn't that thin.

Velma:Up there with Shaggy for who most looks like the cartoon but whats up with the "Let's get jinkie with it" crap,was this movie made in 1997 and it's just coming out now.

BTW: Linda Cardelini is hot,been a big fan since "Freaks and Geeks"

but you probably all thought before,so I'm not saying anything new and/or great.

And my vote for BEST movie of the summer goes to(even though it's not out yet) The Bourne Identity,the prevews look awesome and it has Franka "Lola" Potente.

But of course it may be crap but it gets my vote...........for now at least


(edited by ICEMAN on 13.6.02 1303)
FLRockAndLaw
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#17 Posted on 13.6.02 1336.46
Reposted on: 13.6.09 1352.07

    Originally posted by ICEMAN
    Fred:In the cartoon,he's HHH and in the movie he's X-Pac.


Best. Soundbite. Ever.
Big Bad
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#18 Posted on 13.6.02 1401.36
Reposted on: 13.6.09 1414.49
I would NEVER diss Rowan Atkinson. His stand-up act is brilliant, and so was his work on Blackadder. Except for the glorified cameo in Four Weddings and a Funeral, however, his film work has been crap. Rowan on TV=good. Rowan in movies=bad.

Linda Cardellini was on Conan last night and looked like the hottest woman on earth. Matthew McConaghey was the other guest, and was just staring at her the entire time.
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#19 Posted on 13.6.02 1405.30
Reposted on: 13.6.09 1417.59

    Originally posted by Big Bad
    I would NEVER diss Rowan Atkinson. His stand-up act is brilliant, and so was his work on Blackadder. Except for the glorified cameo in Four Weddings and a Funeral, however, his film work has been crap. Rowan on TV=good. Rowan in movies=bad.


Well, I like the Tall Man (and you get to see Emma Thompson naked) and there's also Never Say Never Again, which is not horrible when compared to the Bond films of the time.
Parts Unknown
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#20 Posted on 13.6.02 1420.33
Reposted on: 13.6.09 1429.04
    Originally posted by ICEMAN
    Fred:In the cartoon,he's HHH and in the movie he's X-Pac.


Absolutely hilarious comment there. I think you could have said the same for Daphne: in the cartoon, she's Trish, but in the movie, she's SaraTaker.
UGH!
My problem with Scooby-Doo is the dumb looking CG dog. My god! Remember the days when talking animals in movies looked real? Why didn't they get a real dog and stick a carrot up its butt to get it to talk?
The only way to make this movie worse is put Scrappy in it, the bastard.
And I agree - Bourne Identity is gonna kick ass. I'm reading the book right now and it rules.

(edited by Parts Unknown on 13.6.02 1426)
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