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28.3.17 0338
The 7 - Pro Wrestling - TNA IMPACT Workrate Report Episode #37
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tomk
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#1 Posted on 19.6.06 0223.12
Reposted on: 19.6.13 0224.02
WHAT WORKED:

I liked the Jeff Jarrett King of Mountain promo. Quickly got over all the angles involved.

Ok so the Tivo was all pixilated and I couldn’t follow most of the post match Shane Douglas mic work and there were problems during the match but I’m gonna put the Diamonds v. Naturals on the top side largely because I really dug the Chase Stevens vs. David Young interactions. That said both teams have been used as jobber teams for awhile but this angle really is first time both teams have been portrayed as jobber teams. As that point is really being hit home. Also not sure why Tenay felt need to cover for Chase Stevens getting busted open in the match by explaining it as though Chase Stevens was busted up by the chain interference post match. But whatever… Oh and dug the Latin American X border. This whole thing was so broken up and pixelated that it may have deserved to be on the bottom side...but nothing that I saw was actively bad and I'm giving it the benefit of the doubt.

The Steiner vs. Joe face off video package was really great. Steiner is nonsensical and fun and Joe just is great at both projecting himself while also putting over his opponent. Joe making sure to cover the what Steiner’s strengths are : international experience, suplexes, amateur credentials…is the type of thing few people seem to get these days. You either get guys burying their opponents or guys who say my opponent is really great at their own expense. Why should I want to watch a match where you tell me ahead of time that your opponent sucks? Why should I be impressed by the win? Joe’s really great at this and its super old school and works “You have lots of international experience, and suplexes, and amateur credentials but I’m just gonna add another win when I beat you this Saturday at the Omni”.

WHAT DIDN’T WORK:

-The one thing I’ve consistently liked about the build up to the PPV is every time another guy gets on the mic and says Slammiversary…I get Tony Toni Tone stuck in my head. Fucking Nash ruins it by trying to get a Little River Band tune jammed in my skull.

-Hey it’s Todd Stone in a Masked Superstar mask. Maan I watch too much wrestling when I can recognize US midgets by the shape of their head and gait. Last time I saw Todd Stone he was on Smackdown wrestling against Pierrothcito. It was a real styles clash as Stone is a US midget heel while Pierrothcito is a Mexican midget rudo and took awhile for the two to figure out what role to play opposite the other. Last time Todd Stone was in TNA, Jeff Jarrett gave him an absolutely devastating piledriver which lead to Puppet coming out to make the save while waving a gun. Nash hits Stone with a weak looking power slam and Puppet can’t be bothered to unholster his gun. This whole thing is setting up Nash vs. Chris Sabin. At least Puppet could work the mic.

-Maan that opening Christian mic segment was painful. Couldn’t they just edit together a video package? Making it worse was Tenay and Don West doing their playby play of the mic work. I don’t remember Ross ever doing play by play for Austin’s mic work…you call the matches, let the mic work carry itself. If they’re going to do running commentary on the mic work , they really need to have just West do it. The difference between West and Tenay when doing this was just glaring. I mean I’ve said for a while that Tenay should stick to calling moves and let West call the angles. As Tenay just sucks at putting over the angles. But Fuck…if they’re going to do running commentary on the mic work…West should be the one to do it. Maybe Tenay can call grammar.

Slick Johnson as wrestling personality.

Slick Johnson also stinks as in ring ref. Although he probably wasn’t the shittiest thing about the main event. Scott DÁmore is now athletic and leaps into ring. Both Gail Kim and Scott DÁmore have lousy timing for seconds as neither seem to be in place at right time. Kim gets into ring too early for her spot and DÁmore’s climbing on apron spot made no sense at the moment he did it. AJ Styles was good as face in peril and did nice job eating Brown and Roode’s offense. Harris does a nice job eating the face offense too. Those two and Roode seemed to be trying hard…but that isn’t enough. Rhino looked absolutely shitty and unmotivated in his cleaning house section. Raven was useless and I don’t know what was up with him rocking his head to sell kicks to the leg. One would think that having Raven just sit in corner to take shots would be good use of him. But he even fucks that up. Plus seeing him splayed laying in the corner spread eagle wasn’t something I wanted to see. His dark trunks exposed under his dress really had the look of the nasty hairy snatch of a fat goth girl. The everyone hits finishers “PLEASE DON’T STOP “finish was amusing. Especially liked the randomness of Daniels throwing out a palm strike as his near fall. Apparently if you even have a casual interest in state-of-the-art modern wrestling, if you don't watch this match, you'll be behind the curve. Thankfully the TNA crowd doesn’t invent a new chant so Meltzer won’t give this five stars.

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