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The 7 - Random - Help with life... Suggestions are more then welcome. Register and log in to post!
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#1 Posted on 8.6.05 1400.39
Reposted on: 8.6.12 1400.52
Well, life is kinda sucking about now.

I took a job as a loss prevention agent for a rather large retail company at the end of last year. My job has been taking me out of the state I live in for weeks at a time and I'm kinda lonely at times. It's been suggested that I should move out of Florida to a state somewhere more 'centrally located' so that I'd be able to get back home more often. Also, I'm told that I would be paid to move as well as get more jobs if I wasn't so far south. Lastly, they'll pick up the moving expenses.

DAMN! This all sounds great, but I kinda like Florida. I've been there quite a while now and I haven't really thought much about it till the past week or so but I actually LIKE living there. Sure the weather sucks and some of the people get on my nerves most of the time (DAMN YANKEES!), but I'm not all sure I really want to move. I own my home, I've added to it so much that it's worth almost four times what it was ten years ago. There's also the whole 'pseudo-family' thing now where I can't just up and move on my own, I'd have to discuss it with Serena cause she's a part of my life now too.

I suppose the question I'm wanting help on, is that if you had the opportunity to earn half again more then you are earning now and be set up with a pretty decent home in another state, would you leave a home you already have where you are content with, even though you're hardly ever there anymore. (Does that make sense?)

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Cherries > Peaches
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#2 Posted on 8.6.05 1518.54
Reposted on: 8.6.12 1521.42
Where exactly are we talking about? (Does "centrally located" mean Topeka, Kansas? Chicago, Dallas? DC? Denver? Those are all pretty different choices.

Also, I'm unclear about the "be set up with a pretty decent home" aspect. ?
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#3 Posted on 8.6.05 1613.56
Reposted on: 8.6.12 1614.04
If I could make more money and still be able to "go home" when necessary, I would be willing to move. But, I'm fortunate in that my wife would enjoy moving (her parents are somewhat nomadic).

It seems that your "deal breaker" is Serena. You might also be in a situation in which moving would move your relationship to the next level (though I'm reading a lot into your statement).

At the same time, I would love to move to Florida. I understand that hurricanes suck, but I like warm weather and would welcome the chance to play golf all year long.

You also have to consider if the job you have now is what you want for your ultimate career. Would you rather take a new job (and possibly a pay cut) than leave a home that you've built a lot of equity in?

Ultimately if you're not happy, you need to either change jobs, change where you live, OR see if there is any way that you can arrange for a friend to travel with you on occasion.
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#4 Posted on 8.6.05 1655.41
Reposted on: 8.6.12 1655.50
I'd want to get a solid line from the company on how much more work you'd have from being in the new location. Is the work already there, so to speak, waiting for someone to do it where you can step right in or is it just a projection?
The Guinness.
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#5 Posted on 8.6.05 2030.35
Reposted on: 8.6.12 2034.39
A big move is good thing for life. New challenges that you didn't expect arise. Challenges are a good thing.

People always fall into the misfortune of settling because they got it good (or at least they think they do).

See the world when you can, especially when it is paid for by somebody else. You can always go back provided you left on good terms.

As far as your home goes, rent it out (I strongly suggest using a management company though). Use the cash to from your renters to supplement your income. If things don't go as well as you expect, you will have a place to go back to. On the other hand, if things do go well, you cash in on the equity that you built.

Tough decision, I agree. As far as the Pseudo-Family in your life goes....I have no answers except, Love will find A Way, cheesy but true.

(edited by The Guinness.Lanny Poffo? on 9.6.05 1409)
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#6 Posted on 10.6.05 0252.28
Reposted on: 10.6.12 0254.36
Moving sure can be a hassle, especially as the years go by and you accumulate more crap. And it sounds like you are happy with your current geographic arrangement.

If you were truly happy with your current situation, I'd suspect you wouldn't be posting here. But then again, it's not a slamdunk decision you're facing.

There are always hassles with your current situation, or greener pastures that may look appealing. I've said for years that it's the American way to bitch about your job - why else would Dilbert be so popular?

My 30 second BS psychoanalysis tells me that you are more unhappy with your career than where you live. As someone who has moved both for geographic reasons (to be closer to family, etc.) and for career choice, I'd say it's easier to justify moving for geographic reasons. Neither is easier, but if there is an opportunity to evaluate options, don't only look for the quick buck - money won't buy happiness.

Realize that both what you do and where you live are both huge factors in your ultimate happiness.. Sometimes, people don’t have much choice - folks who get laid off in a tight job market know this all to well. People can and do get over the hassles, some people are just more agreeable to moving than others.

If there is any possibility of you looking at a new career choice locally, I’d suggest you do so. If you can’t change it right away, realize that you might only be in a temporary situation and see how things look every 6 months or so. Count your blessings.

It may sound like a cliché, but setting short and long-term goals really works for people who realize they are unhappy with part of their current situation. Be flexible.

Best of Luck.
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#7 Posted on 10.6.05 0724.58
Reposted on: 10.6.12 0725.00
If you are moving for the money remember that unless you are going from Florida to Texas, you are going to be going to a state that has state income on top of federal income tax. If the money is a lot better it is not much to think about, but if it is only a 10-15% bump the state is going to eat up a large chunk of it and it wouldn't be worth the aggrevation of moving.
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#8 Posted on 10.6.05 1212.43
Reposted on: 10.6.12 1212.43
Actually, my question in all of this would be, why would you be looking for work, if you didnt already know you were unhappy?

Either way, if the job pays 50% more, but the cost of living is higher, is it a better trade off?

You are getting married, right? Then how she feels is the main factor, if you dont HAVE To move for financial reasons and are not being REQUIRED to relocate by your company, it should be a mutual decision between the two of you.

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#9 Posted on 13.6.05 1600.45
Reposted on: 13.6.12 1602.08
Ok, what I'm doing now is going to different stores as a stooge and finding out why so much product is coming up missing and who's doing it and how. (No I will not say who I work for.) When I get all the information I need, I contact my boss and spill the beans. The 'worst' part of the job is coming into these stores as a department manager or whatever from "...another state." and I get to pretend to be a good guy wanting to stay with the company while I move to a new city. On average, it's taken me about three weeks to get in and find out what's up. Get the names of the bad people and move on.

I don't 'hate' the job but I feel bad when I do my job right. Yeah, it's a shitty job, but I seem to be pretty good at it. I've gone to 14 stores so far between Florida, Georgia, Alabama, and Ohio. I'm told the company want's me to be able to go to other states, but I have this thing about flying. They're paying half my expenses right now but that'll bump up to all my expenses if I agree to move somewhere more 'centrally located in the states' which will allow me to get around quicker.

This certainly isn't something I thought I'd EVER be doing, but it pay's pretty well and I get a commission on top of my regular salary. If I were to move somewhere of thier choosing, I'm guaranteed about $18k more a year and I know there's work to keep me going for a good six or seven more years right now. It all sounds like a win/win sitituation... but I don't know if I want to move. I may not like the Florida weather all that much of the rain we get three months straight out of the year but this IS my home. I have all my crap here and I have a TON of crap, let me tell you...
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#10 Posted on 13.6.05 1604.49
Reposted on: 13.6.12 1622.56
    Originally posted by Cerebus
    I don't 'hate' the job but I feel bad when I do my job right.

Why? They're stealing (right?), breaking the law, and getting caught, thanks to you. You're the GOOD guy.
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