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The 7 - Pro Wrestling - Bestiality with Sharmell?
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Sterling Golden
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#1 Posted on 13.5.05 0922.53
Reposted on: 13.5.12 0929.01
As I have been loaded up with school work and family life, I haven't been able to keep up with the WWE product. I haven't even been able to watch the Jumbo v. Misawa tapes my brother sent me. But I finished school Wednesday, Last night I thought I'd sit down and take in Smackdown. It was nice to see Sharmell/Paisley on the show. I was flipping over to the Heat game during the commercials. I flipped back late and saw a Kurt Angle promo. He was having trouble spitting out what he wanted to say. Eventually he came out with it. "I want to have sex with Sharmell...not just any kind of sex...but bestiality".
What? Bestiality? I guess they don't have a dictionary up at Titan Towers (what a surprise). I couldn't believe what I heard. Whenever I watch this shit I feel like I need to take a shower afterwords.
Note to the writing staff of Smackdown...FUCK YOU!!!!!
Promote this thread!
EastCoastAvenger
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#2 Posted on 13.5.05 1546.55
Reposted on: 13.5.12 1550.40
    Originally posted by Sterling Golden
    Note to the writing staff of Smackdown...FUCK YOU!!!!!


    Originally posted by New Jack
    I hope somebody runs over they kids!
Oliver
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#3 Posted on 13.5.05 1641.28
Reposted on: 13.5.12 1642.23
Maybe he's been watching too much Bloodhound Gang, and had THE BAD TOUCH on his mind.

    Originally posted by The Bloodhound Gang's THE BAD TOUCH song

    Do it now
    You and me baby ain’t nothin’ but mammals
    So let’s do it like they do on the discovery channel
    Do it again now
    You and me baby ain’t nothin’ but mammals
    So let’s do it like they do on the discovery channel
    Gettin’ horny now

Phantom Lord
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#4 Posted on 13.5.05 1646.58
Reposted on: 13.5.12 1648.22
Yeah that Angle promo while funny and creepy could have been worded alot better.

Angle could of gotten the same point across just by saying dirty perveted sex and thats it.

But at this point can anyone say they are surprised if something that stupid is not only scripted but green lit and allowed on the air.
mountinman44
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#5 Posted on 13.5.05 1734.49
Reposted on: 13.5.12 1736.59
The Angle promo was, in a word, brutal. That was the worst thing I have seen since HHH popped the "corpse" of Katie Vick. Angle doesn't need a promo like that to get over as a heel. We should be talking about the incredible promo Eddie cut to start the show. Instead, the WWF gives us more crap.
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#6 Posted on 13.5.05 2013.11
Reposted on: 13.5.12 2013.32
Maybe what Kurt meant was beastial, as in...having sex like beasts would?
PostModernBoy
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#7 Posted on 13.5.05 2124.38
Reposted on: 13.5.12 2124.42
Isn't this the exact sort of set-up that used to be resolved with Sharmell turning on Booker T and aligning with Kurt Angle? Whether or not she turns up at the PPV with sluttier looking hair and makeup will be the key clue.
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#8 Posted on 13.5.05 2258.39
Reposted on: 13.5.12 2259.02
Is it possible that was just Kurt's backwards way of saying Sharmell's like a dirty animal and everybody's just blowing things out of proportion?
Snookum
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#9 Posted on 13.5.05 2359.34
Reposted on: 13.5.12 2359.37
I'm assuming he just meant to have sex with her like an animal. My problem is that it's so backwards in character for Angle. The Angle we've seen for years in WWE would not be the one to announce on national television that he want to have perverted sex with anyone. He's the type that would denounce such thoughts and THEN - as the payoff to the gag - be caught having perverted sex with someone.

I would be happy if he came back next week and admitted that he didn't really want to touch "that gutterslut of yours," but just wanted to sucker Booker into being humiliated in front of his wife. Now that I could buy.

Yeah, I know the argument is that WWE's writers never bother with continuity, so it won't happen; but it would be the type of resolution that I would be happy to see there.
JustinShapiro
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#10 Posted on 14.5.05 0101.46
Reposted on: 14.5.12 0105.05
"I would be happy if he came back next week and admitted that he didn't really want to touch "that gutterslut of yours," but just wanted to sucker Booker into being humiliated in front of his wife."

I thought that was the whole point of him doing the blatantly over the top interview, then hiding to attack Booker when he ran backstage. He could care less about having beastial sex with Sharmell; it's all about getting into Book's head and tormenting the T family. It is, um, not the direction I would've liked to have seen their feud go, but it's not quite the disconnect you guys are talking about.

(P.S. the idea that Angle isn't 'entertaining' anymore is kind of dubious. he's not exclusively doing comedy any more, because he wants to be a mean guy who people genuinely hate instead of just have fun with. even so, he still finds time to amuse: his Shawn Michaels entrance with Sherri in March was up there with anything he's done.)

(edited by JustinShapiro on 14.5.05 0222)
The Great Thomas
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#11 Posted on 14.5.05 0149.03
Reposted on: 14.5.12 0150.33
    Originally posted by BigVitoMark
    Is it possible that was just Kurt's backwards way of saying Sharmell's like a dirty animal and everybody's just blowing things out of proportion?
THANK YOU. That's just what I thought when I heard him say it. Kurt is pretty much insulting Sharmell by calling her an animal. Too bad it went over everybody's heads.
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#12 Posted on 14.5.05 0849.50
Reposted on: 14.5.12 0855.13
Maybe Kurt is just a big Nine Inch Nails fan?
FurryHippie
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#13 Posted on 14.5.05 1046.38
Reposted on: 14.5.12 1046.41
I don't think that's what he meant. He said he wanted to have "perverted" sex with her. Like kinky freaky stuff. He mentioned "beastility" sex as an example of a sex that is wrong and perverse. He doesn't specifically say that beastiality IS the type of sex he's shooting for. I just think he was trying to put in our minds that he wants to do sick things with her.

We should all be ashamed of ourselves for analyzing this.
sentonBOMB
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#14 Posted on 14.5.05 1112.24
Reposted on: 14.5.12 1113.49
    Originally posted by The Vile1
    Maybe what Kurt meant was beastial, as in...having sex like beasts would?


This is what I heard him say as well.

And FurryHippie... man, we're on a wrestling message board; it's not like we have a whole lot better things to do than analyze this stuff. :)
asteroidboy
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#15 Posted on 14.5.05 2044.53
Reposted on: 14.5.12 2059.01
    Originally posted by JustinShapiro
    (P.S. the idea that Angle isn't 'entertaining' anymore is kind of dubious. he's not exclusively doing comedy any more, because he wants to be a mean guy who people genuinely hate instead of just have fun with. even so, he still finds time to amuse: his Shawn Michaels entrance with Sherri in March was up there with anything he's done.)

    (edited by JustinShapiro on 14.5.05 0222)


I've definitely made this claim and I'm sticking to it. If he did a funny bit with Sherri Martel, it's a deviation and not the norm anymore, sadly.

Over the last few years, Angle has drifted toward the mean-spirited vicious type of heel that's far less original in the wrestling universe than his old mean-spirited apple-polishing heel act. He's neutered what worked for him and replaced it with an ongoing Ken Shamrock "snapped" routine.

Seriously, how original is it in wrestling to have a mean streak, or to claim you're the best wrestler and enjoy crippling people? That was what made Angle such a pleasure in the beginning, he deviated so much from that formula and it worked. Who had ever copped to being a virgin in wrestling? And playing the wholesome routine up so much that the modern audience screamed for his head? That, not Rock, was the perfect anti-Steve Austin heel. Maybe it wasn't serious enough for Angle, but I'll still take the comedic heel any day.

I guess I don't see how the "mean" Kurt Angle has gotten him any farther. He's now a top guy on a horrible show. If he moved to RAW, he'd be third-generation copy of HHH.
Freeway
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#16 Posted on 14.5.05 2101.56
Reposted on: 14.5.12 2106.22
The problem with recent WWE booking visa ve gimmicks has been their genericness. Look at all the HOSSES, BY GAWD they have had in recent years: Batista, Viscera, Mark Henry, Tyson Tomko, Luther Reigns, Chris Masters, Mark Jindrak, Gene Snitsky, Garrison Cade, The Big Show, Nathan Jones, Heidenreich, John Cena's rookie "character", Matt Morgan, Jesus, The Bashams...and hell, even Kane & The Undertaker. Aside from The Undertaker's supercool gimmick, almost all of these guys were given DUMB gimmicks as a means of diffentiating each other. Batista came in as a bodyguard for Reverend D-Von. Viscera's current gimmick is BAD (but morbidly funny). Masters, Shawn Stasiak & Mark Jindrak all got the "Perfection" gimmick...but beyond being ripped...what could they do? And it goes on like this.

The problem I have with gradually making Kurt Angle overly serious is that it might detract from his character too much. Kurt Angle's entire character hangs on his success. He's a gold medalist. He's a multi-time WWE Champion. He won the King of the Ring. He's beaten EVERYONE worth beating (Triple H, Benoit, Guerrero, Lesnar, Austin, Rock, Hogan...), so if he's not trying to become WWE Champion it feels to me like he's wasting his time.
HMD
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#17 Posted on 15.5.05 0046.01
Reposted on: 15.5.12 0046.01
    Originally posted by asteroidboy
    Over the last few years, Angle has drifted toward the mean-spirited vicious type of heel that's far less original in the wrestling universe than his old mean-spirited apple-polishing heel act. He's neutered what worked for him and replaced it with an ongoing Ken Shamrock "snapped" routine.

    Seriously, how original is it in wrestling to have a mean streak, or to claim you're the best wrestler and enjoy crippling people? That was what made Angle such a pleasure in the beginning, he deviated so much from that formula and it worked. Who had ever copped to being a virgin in wrestling? And playing the wholesome routine up so much that the modern audience screamed for his head? That, not Rock, was the perfect anti-Steve Austin heel. Maybe it wasn't serious enough for Angle, but I'll still take the comedic heel any day.

    I guess I don't see how the "mean" Kurt Angle has gotten him any farther. He's now a top guy on a horrible show. If he moved to RAW, he'd be third-generation copy of HHH.


Those are all fair criticisms, except the last paragraph. However, I seem to remember a lot of people suggesting that his character was pure mid-card when he did these kinds of antics. In fact, if you'll recall, virtually the entire time he did that character he never really got to be in the top mix; he was on the periphery but he wasn't the tip-top class. Angle may have had the title, but those were undercard bouts with an Austin or Rocky or Hunter grudge match main event. It was vehemently argued at that time that he couldn't draw main event money doing the kind of goofy material he was doing, as interesting and innovative as it was. In fact, it was taken as evidence that he was being "held back".

As for him not being entertaining anymore, I don't know what people could ask that Angle hasn't delivered. He has been in probably three of the four best television matches so far this year (Jannetty, Mysterio in Japan, Guerrero in the Championship Series, with Shelton/Michaels being also in that class). His match with Cena at No Way Out was the best match Cena has probably ever had, and was certainly worlds better than any match Triple H carried Dave to this year; that comparison is fitting, because both matches were contigent on a tenured hand (Angle and Hunter) carrying a green heir-apparent (Cena and Batista) to a star-making performance. His Wrestlemania match was absolutely fantastic, probably the best Mania match ever, and he absolutely carried the entertainment portion of the feud and delivered all the strong promos that made it inticing. And he's doing it all on the most broken-down body in professional wrestling.

If he's a third-generation copy, it's the kind of copy that surpasses its predecessor and takes over the fucking planet. The horribleness of the show has nothing to do with Kurt.

I can't for the life of me believe anyone wants more out of Kurt Angle. With his year so far, I'm more than willing to cut him some slack on the shit promo from SD.

(edited by Hogan's My Dad on 14.5.05 2252)
StaggerLee
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#18 Posted on 15.5.05 0838.40
Reposted on: 15.5.12 0847.23
Best Wrestlemania match EVER?

Hell, Angle vs HBK wasnt even ANGLE's best WM match (either of the Benoit matches easily top HBK)

But, really though, how far could his old gimmick really go? Even when he was winning the title, it was stale then. Now, three years later, its WAY old.

JustinShapiro
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#19 Posted on 15.5.05 1610.51
Reposted on: 15.5.12 1610.55
I agree with pretty much everything HMDad said, but will add my own too sense.

I don't think there's anything wrong with preferring the comedy heel Kurt Angle, because that character was on the short list of the most entertaining in the history of wrestling. But I don't think you can hold becoming a more serious, despised heel against him either. Kurt knows even more than everybody that his wrestling career is a very tenuous thing and he has a finite amount of time left as an active performer. With that in the back of his mind, he has two dovetailing goals: to maximize the amount of money he can earn in wrestling (by headlining), and to augment his legacy so he can go down as one of the all-time greats. Well, in order to accomplish both of these things, he had to get away from being a comedy figure, 'cause that's just how it be's in wrestling. I was more amused by the Edge who existed for the benefit of those with flash photography, but I understand completely why he'd feel the need to get away from that in order to advance as a singles star.

I also think AB's criticisms of Kurt becoming less entertaining are definitely fair, because 2004 was his worst year as a performer on account of him never being comfortable with the crappy Angry General Manager character, then not getting much better as the leader of the albatross known as Team Angle II, which considering where both dudes are now makes it an even bigger pile of monkey (cuz Reigns and Jindrak both look like ones) crap. Combine that with the fact that he was only in a single **** match on the Justin scale that year (Mania 20), and that his neck had gotten so bad that couldn't wrestle from April to July and the less-publicized period in November and December when he only wrestled on PPV where they hid him in multi-man matches so he wouldn't have to take bumps. On the whole, not a lot for a Kurt Angle fan to get excited about in 2004 either wrestling or performing, because in-ring he was just trying his best to hang on, and in character he was struggling in ill-suited, unentertaining roles like Smackdown GM and leader of the Blow Man Group.

Buuut, how about this, both strains converge in 2005. What Angle has done this year has been nothing short of incredible. I don't know how he's willed his body to all these great matches, but it's pretty awe-inspiring when you think about how bad he was hurting at the end of 2004. But besides that, and more in line with this discussion, I think he's also found the right balance in playing a really mean, unlikeable heel without taking it to the dull, colorless extreme that Triple H does (though, in fairness, he can also be pretty funny in the rare times he strays from the grrrr hyperserious).

Angle is now a genuinely hateable guy instead of someone to play along and have fun with, but he's also maintained a level of jocularity -- his delivery is still impeccable, his Michaels impression was amazing, and his interplay with JBL has been hilarious at times. The only other time I think he's struck this good a balance in his character as a serious top heel was in the way-too-short-lived period at the beginning of 2003 as the heel champ leading Team Angle that they had to give up when he had his first neck surgery.



Finally, Angle/Michaels might not be the best match in Wrestlemania history, but it's way up there, and yeah it's a lot better than Benoit 17 (which was great) and the threeway at 16 (which wasn't). It's subjective and all our opinions are unique and beautiful amounts of snowflakes, and I realize that everything that is older and from the past is automatically better than something that just happened, but I don't think either of those matches could easily top Angle/Michaels.

(edited by JustinShapiro on 15.5.05 1712)
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