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The 7 - Site Bashing - ESPN.com hires 7-year-old child as writer Register and log in to post!
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sweetroll
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#1 Posted on 8.3.05 1405.38
Reposted on: 8.3.12 1405.50
The lead story on ESPN.com right now is the announcement that they have hired a new writer for the website's Page 2. This is the writer's introduction to the world: (sports.espn.go.com)

"Well, first off – I is not that important. I am just a writer from Slam, XXL, NBA and Nike who found his way into ESPN's backdoor. Lucked up. Spit a few verbs, convinced 'em that Stephen A. wasn't the only one.

"So instead of wasting space on Page 2 ducking my own sic, I figured if I told you some of the things I believe in, that would give you a better idea of what I intend to flip once a week for the Worldwide Leader. Because it ain't where you at; it's where you coming from that matters. Right?"

First off, I'm pretty sure most of the above isn't in Engling, and secondly, THIS PERSON IS GETTING PAID TO WRITE THOSE WORDS. Honestly, how does ESPN edit this guy's columns? "Scoop, you wrote, 'It ain't where you is.' We suggest using, 'It ain't where at.'" I am absolutely baffled that somebody at a large media company thought this guy was not only talented, but that it was worth promoting as the sports world's lead story.
Promote this thread!
Whitebacon
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#2 Posted on 8.3.05 1416.25
Reposted on: 8.3.12 1418.26
Please tell me that that page is some sort of spoof. PLEASE.

EDIT:
Nope. Right there on the main page.

(edited by Whitebacon on 8.3.05 1217)
Alessandro
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#3 Posted on 8.3.05 1431.45
Reposted on: 8.3.12 1431.45
"Ducking my own sic" ... Heh, that's actually kinda funny.

And I thought this forum was to bash wrestling-related web sites ...



(edited by Alessandro on 8.3.05 1532)
BWT
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#4 Posted on 8.3.05 1437.03
Reposted on: 8.3.12 1438.06
....I believe this guy sucks!
CRZ
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#5 Posted on 8.3.05 1443.48
Reposted on: 8.3.12 1444.19
    Originally posted by Alessandro
    And I thought this forum was to bash wrestling-related web sites ...
We can branch out, so long as the bashing has merit. (This case: yep)
CANADIAN BULLDOG
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#6 Posted on 8.3.05 1503.30
Reposted on: 8.3.12 1503.33
Here's the part I don't get:


Scoop Jackson is an award-winning journalist who has covered sports and culture for more than 15 years. He is a former editor of Slam, XXL, Hoop, and Inside Stuff magazines; and the author of "Sole Provider: 30 Years of NIKE Basketball," "Battlegrounds: America's Street Poets Called Ballers" and "LeBron James: the Chambers of Fear." He resides in Chicago with his wife and two kids.


I mean, it must be a joke, right? Either the concept or the credentials at the end.... He would have written his first article 8 years before he was born, otherwise.
Jaguar
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#7 Posted on 8.3.05 1510.49
Reposted on: 8.3.12 1512.53
The first part threw me for a loop, but I enjoyed the "I believe.." part. Probably stemming from watching too much wrestling, but my first reaction was, "This gimmick is crap." But it might have room to grow.

-Jag
Alessandro
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#8 Posted on 8.3.05 1515.20
Reposted on: 8.3.12 1523.06
    Originally posted by CANADIAN BULLDOG
    He would have written his first article 8 years before he was born, otherwise.


Sweetroll was just making a joke, right? Nowhere in that article does ESPN claim that the writer is actually seven years old ...

thecubsfan
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#9 Posted on 8.3.05 1519.04
Reposted on: 8.3.12 1523.07

    He would have written his first article 8 years before he was born, otherwise.


The thread title is a joke. He's trying to make fun of the author's ability to complete paragraphs. (<- joke)

It's fairly obviously they let all the Page 2 writers write like they'd like to write, and just keep them on task and , They're more intersted allowing unique voices speak in their own words instead of looking for something vaguely gramatically correct or even factually correct.

It's Blog2. Either the ain't's will cause you to flip back to the 'professional' baskebtall pieces or they'll warm you up to the writer.

(above is not neccesarily a statement of approval)

Since this was the typical 'make 50 comments and hope one of them hooks you", I actually had more of a problem with his other article; no one in Chicago (which I mean non-Ill Ini grads) would care about Champagin-Urbana basketball if they hadn't been undefeated and even when they were, it was running second basketball story to a .500 professional team. And now that they've lost, they're about three weeks from being completely forgetton, winning the title or not.

The press loves them and coveres them huge because of it's place in history, but to most of us, these are 1 kids we really didn't know before they blew out Gonzaga and won't care much about by elite eight, I reckon. (<- folksy joke!)

but perhaps I'm bitter
too-old-now
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#10 Posted on 8.3.05 1525.49
Reposted on: 8.3.12 1527.51
I'm missing where it says he's only 7 years old?

I had a friend growing up who was born on leap day, and on his 32nd anniversary he had celebrated just 8 birthdays, so his wife threw him a party complete with a clown and pony rides.
CANADIAN BULLDOG
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#11 Posted on 8.3.05 1537.53
Reposted on: 8.3.12 1559.01
    Originally posted by Alessandro
      Originally posted by CANADIAN BULLDOG
      He would have written his first article 8 years before he was born, otherwise.


    Sweetroll was just making a joke, right? Nowhere in that article does ESPN claim that the writer is actually seven years old ...





Oops. My mistake....
JayJayDean
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#12 Posted on 8.3.05 1543.52
Reposted on: 8.3.12 1559.02
His article about the Illini was not too bad, but I think the guy is just trying to do a poor Ralph Wiley-imitation.
dunkndollaz
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#13 Posted on 8.3.05 1604.26
Reposted on: 8.3.12 1606.56
Hopefully Simmons will ignore him and make him irrelevant. Scoop just threw a lot of crap at the wall - he will get mail and will get people talking about him but it's anybody's guess as to whether he will stick.
sweetroll
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#14 Posted on 8.3.05 1606.13
Reposted on: 8.3.12 1607.08
The man is obviously not seven years old. I would bet, however, that your typical second-grader could probably hang with, ahem, "Scoop" (ugh), in a head-to-head grammar matchup. Hence the title.

I understand the concept of letting writers speak in their own voice, but those articles aren't transcripts of speeches delivered by the writer. This guy actually took the time to put pen to paper and craft sentences filled with "ain'ts" and "ya'lls." (And FWIW, he didn't even spell "y'all" right.)

Also baffling, ESPN.com puts this guy front-and-center during the work day. Maybe things have changed from when I was a web producer, but the 1-5 time period generally has a lot of "corporate time-wasting" traffic. I don't think Ralph in Accounting is going to find a lot of common ground with the writer's work.
Joseph Ryder
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#15 Posted on 9.3.05 1520.27
Reposted on: 9.3.12 1521.19
    Originally posted by sweetroll
    The man is obviously not seven years old. I would bet, however, that your typical second-grader could probably hang with, ahem, "Scoop" (ugh), in a head-to-head grammar matchup.
I'll take that bet.

    I understand the concept of letting writers speak in their own voice, but those articles aren't transcripts of speeches delivered by the writer.
Perhaps that is how his writing is intended.

    This guy actually took the time to put pen to paper and craft sentences filled with "ain'ts" and "ya'lls."
So do a HELL of a lot of other writers. Keep on the lookout for them too.

    Also baffling, ESPN.com puts this guy front-and-center during the work day. Maybe things have changed from when I was a web producer, but the 1-5 time period generally has a lot of "corporate time-wasting" traffic. I don't think Ralph in Accounting is going to find a lot of common ground with the writer's work.
The 1-5 time period is not just the max for "corporate time-wasting" traffic, but pretty much ALL traffic. "Corporate time-wasters" don't butter ESPN's bread...sports fans do, so if Ralph in accounting is offended by a different voice he can just click "back," go to the NBA section, and decide between ESPN's trifecta of goofy white guys who would never dare use "ain't" in their pristine sentences.

(edited by Joseph Ryder on 9.3.05 1321)
JohnPi
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#16 Posted on 10.3.05 1113.54
Reposted on: 10.3.12 1114.58
    Originally posted by Alessandro
    "Ducking my own sic" ... Heh, that's actually kinda funny.

    And I thought this forum was to bash wrestling-related web sites ...



    (edited by Alessandro on 8.3.05 1532)


I just gotta know. . . what exactly does "Ducking my own sic" mean? I know I must be getting old, as the kids like to say, but that's some jive-talkin' that I just do not understand.
drjayphd
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#17 Posted on 10.3.05 1245.36
Reposted on: 10.3.12 1245.38
Maybe it'd make a little more sense if he'd said "ducking my own sick". But the point is it's clearly from the Ruck Fules school of linguistics.

(I'd say what it's SUPPOSED to mean, but I'm at work and all.)
EddieBurkett
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#18 Posted on 10.3.05 1721.37
Reposted on: 10.3.12 1721.44
    Originally posted by drjayphd
    Maybe it'd make a little more sense if he'd said "ducking my own sick". But the point is it's clearly from the Ruck Fules school of linguistics.

    (I'd say what it's SUPPOSED to mean, but I'm at work and all.)


Well that's just bass ackwards.
Matt Tracker
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#19 Posted on 11.3.05 1123.57
Reposted on: 11.3.12 1127.25
    Originally posted by Joseph Ryder

      This guy actually took the time to put pen to paper and craft sentences filled with "ain'ts" and "ya'lls."
So do a HELL of a lot of other writers. Keep on the lookout for them too.


Yes and tell all of them that it's Y'ALL, a contraction of "you" and "all."


And there's more. Here's Simmons's reaction in today's mailbag column:

Q: Scoop Jackson says that "Cornbread, Earl and Me" and "The Bingo Long Traveling All-Stars" are the greatest sports movies of all time. Where do you rank them?
– Brian Artis, Newport News, Va.

SG: That's like asking me, "Scoop Jackson thinks the world is flat, where do you stand?"

(edited by Matt Tracker on 11.3.05 0938)
Joseph Ryder
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#20 Posted on 11.3.05 1419.02
Reposted on: 11.3.12 1419.32
    Originally posted by Matt Tracker
      Originally posted by Joseph Ryder
        So do a HELL of a lot of other writers. Keep on the lookout for them too.
    Yes and tell all of them that it's Y'ALL, a contraction of "you" and "all."
That's an issue you should have with Scoop Jackson's editor.
    Originally posted by Matt Tracker
    And there's more. Here's Simmons's reaction in today's mailbag column:

    Q: Scoop Jackson says that "Cornbread, Earl and Me" and "The Bingo Long Traveling All-Stars" are the greatest sports movies of all time. Where do you rank them?
    – Brian Artis, Newport News, Va.

    SG: That's like asking me, "Scoop Jackson thinks the world is flat, where do you stand?"

    (edited by Matt Tracker on 11.3.05 0938)
Bill Simmons' opinion on Scoop's taste in sports movies is irrelevant.

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