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25.10.07 2019
The 7 - Pro Wrestling - HHH's Sledgehammer
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Jakegnosis
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#1 Posted on 22.4.04 2146.13
Reposted on: 22.4.11 2148.40
I have to get this off my chest. It's been bothering me for years.

HHH's sledgehammer is the lamest foreign object in wrestling history.

First, it's how he utilizes the damn thing. When he slams someone with it, he puts his hand over the head of it and jabs at them like he's playing pool. There's no momentum behind the blow, and he's CUSHIONING the strike with his hand. It looks unbelievably bogus. Even a cookie sheet looks more vicious than the way he pokes at people with his sledgehammer.

Secondly, a sledgehammer is overkill. That's a bone-crushing implement, and getting hit with it solidly(let's pretend it looks even remotely convincing, just for the sake of argument) and doing anything except twitch and writhe in pain clutching the smashed area, is ridiculous. Getting hit with a sledgehammer is a trip to the hospital, period.

So why does he sling this huge weapon around in the most unconvincing way possible? He looks like a total rube every time he does it. And we wonder why people laugh at wrestling. It's because of stupid, obviously fake shit like that.

Worst. Foreign object. Ever.

(edited by Jakegnosis on 22.4.04 2047)
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Evil Antler God
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#2 Posted on 22.4.04 2158.56
Reposted on: 22.4.11 2159.01
Probably because if he didn't jab it like a pool cue, there's no way in hell he could attempt a headshot with it and have it in any way NOT look ridiculous

.......well, I suppose he could go the Scott Steiner route and use a foam sledgehammer, but then you risk it going all limp like his did on national television

........and my GOD but that did not sound right
AssDroid!
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#3 Posted on 22.4.04 2204.09
Reposted on: 22.4.11 2205.23
The same thing could be said about a baseball bat (that it is a bone-crushing implement). I think the reason why Triple H uses it is because it is easy to wield and it is believable that you could hurt someone without actually killing them with it. Baseball bats, brass knucks, etc. were already being used and the sledgehammer was the best thing that no one was using.

Otherwise, what else is left? An axe?!
Jakegnosis
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#4 Posted on 22.4.04 2221.26
Reposted on: 22.4.11 2222.25
But why use it at all?

It looks like shit the way he uses it, and if he used it correctly, it would be either have to be fake or someone would die.

Baseball bats aren't as lethal as sledgehammers, and the only one I've seen in recent memory is Foley's Barbie, which would do much bloodier but more superficial damage because the barbed wire would cushion the blow while it shredded the flesh.

HHH should ditch the sledgehammer. It has no upside and he doesn't need a weapon, anyway, if he's the "greatest professional wrestler alive today."

(edited by Jakegnosis on 22.4.04 2209)
Big Bad
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#5 Posted on 22.4.04 2300.16
Reposted on: 22.4.11 2301.50
CRZ used to have a satirical version of RAW (not written by Matt Hocking) on his website, and Triple H's weapon of choice was a giant metal H.
Asian Business Man
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#6 Posted on 22.4.04 2323.20
Reposted on: 22.4.11 2324.10
Yes I think HHH should go fron the sledgehammer to a more realistice weapon like when Kane used to shoot fireballs at X-Pac like he was Liu Kang
ekedolphin
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#7 Posted on 23.4.04 0206.18
Reposted on: 23.4.11 0208.32
I would've loved to see Kane do Liu Kang's bicycle kick.
evilwaldo
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#8 Posted on 23.4.04 1013.01
Reposted on: 23.4.11 1013.38
The Sledgehammer is actually the Sledgehammer of Plot to be used by HHH when he needs to get a plot point across that he has been explaining in boring interviews for the past 3 weeks.
TheOne
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#9 Posted on 23.4.04 1218.16
Reposted on: 23.4.11 1220.58
You say about it looking fake, what bout when they take chair shots to the head, most of them block it with their hands, and its SOOO obvious
The Amazing Salami
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#10 Posted on 23.4.04 1223.38
Reposted on: 23.4.11 1225.47
    Originally posted by TheOne
    You say about it looking fake, what bout when they take chair shots to the head, most of them block it with their hands, and its SOOO obvious


Yes, they block it and yes it's obvious. But that doesn't keep it from looking fairly realistic most of the time. If you were in a fight and a guy swung a chair at your head, if you didn't have time to move and just saw him out of the corner of your eye, what would you do?? Throw your hands up in an attempt to block it.

However, if in a real fight you had a sledge hammer...you wouldn't pool cue someone.
Evil Antler God
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#11 Posted on 23.4.04 1346.07
Reposted on: 23.4.11 1346.14
He could solve this problem by abandoning the shots to the head and going for the "shot to the stomach, shot to the back, several shots to their corpse" route he went with Goldberg and Shawn.....which would be much more effective looking than his pool cue attack.....
ScottLadd
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#12 Posted on 23.4.04 1349.00
Reposted on: 23.4.11 1349.15
Why not just use his nose. I agree about it be lame. Its not a lame weapon just how he use it all times. If he used it to put people off WWE TV only for while it look effective more.
oldschoolhero
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#13 Posted on 23.4.04 1350.27
Reposted on: 23.4.11 1351.31
"However, if in a real fight you had a sledge hammer...you wouldn't pool cue someone."

Not true. if we're going to get ridiculously over-thought here, the logic may be that whilst a pool-cue-style shot would do enough damage behind the ref's back to win a match, swinging for the fences outright would kill 'em, which could put a major cramp on his career aspirations. Hence, he goes for the option that gets the job done, but doesn't go for overkill because he could end up in a jail cell.
The Amazing Salami
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#14 Posted on 23.4.04 1352.59
Reposted on: 23.4.11 1354.07
    Originally posted by oldschoolhero
    "However, if in a real fight you had a sledge hammer...you wouldn't pool cue someone WITH YOUR HAND HELD OVER THE ACTUAL BLUDGEONING PART OF YOUR WEAPON OF CHOICE."


(edited by The Amazing Salami on 23.4.04 1153)
oldschoolhero
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#15 Posted on 23.4.04 1400.01
Reposted on: 23.4.11 1400.56
....which is the EXACT SAME WAY every other weapon shot is delivered. It's the equivalent of a loaded fist, but with a little more oomph. What's the problem with that?
Hogan's My Dad
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#16 Posted on 23.4.04 1629.47
Reposted on: 23.4.11 1629.51
It's just so ridiculous to me that a man would pick up a sledgehammer and hit someone in the face with it and not get fired and arrested. I mean, a chair is around the ring anyway and ought to be logically. So are tables. But why is there a sledgehammer lying there? Who is making swords under the ring? It's so utterly stupid. Maybe if he used it out in the parking lot there would be a logical explanation, but it's just absurd the way it happens. It's a sledgehammer. I can't wait for the day when he pulls out a freakin's spiky metal ball on a chain so JR can squeal "MACE TO THE FACE, BAH GAWD!"
ShotGunShep
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#17 Posted on 23.4.04 1633.43
Reposted on: 23.4.11 1634.48
Evolution puts the sledgehammer under the ring before hand! They have stroke damnit!

And on top of that, you gotta know the rules of pro wrestling, if a FACE breaks a law(such as assault with weapon) he will be taken to jail by 15 cops. However, a heel always goes unpunished.

And if you want to talk about lame weapons. Pro wrestling has seen a sock used, a manequin head used, and a deer head used.
BigVitoMark
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#18 Posted on 23.4.04 1735.54
Reposted on: 23.4.11 1735.55
A lot of things in wrestling can be explained if you just make a few simple assumptions. For example, why do faces go to the jail when they break the law whereas heels get off unpunished? Well, it's usually the heel rival/owner that presses charges and gets the guy arrested...or, in other words, the heel is cowardly and has the cops fight his battles for him while the virtuous good guy would rather get his revenge in the ring.

Now then, let's never refer to Pierre the Moose as a lame weapon again...he made three months of Al Snow vs. Bob Holly worthwhile!
Alex
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#19 Posted on 23.4.04 2338.19
Reposted on: 23.4.11 2339.56
They're also not really punching each other. Oh no I've exposed the business.
hhhgamewmx7
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#20 Posted on 24.4.04 1111.15
Reposted on: 24.4.11 1111.19
The crowd poppig when Trips pulls out the sledgehammer is reason enough to still have it around.
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