Swordsman Yen
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| #1 Posted on 25.2.02 1302.47 Reposted on: 25.2.09 1320.58 | I am considering doing a humor wrestling website, and one section would be the unwritten rules of wrestling. It would be like the unwritten rules of movies (i.e.: "The car will never start if a bad guy is chasing you"), but it would have to do with...well, wrestling. Here are a few ideas I have to get started. Feel free to drop some more...
- Reverse psychology works on wrestlers. ("I guess you don't want to answer my challenge, because you're scared." "You know what? I'll take on all of you.")
- Nobody ever notices the camera backstage.
- In a tag match, the referee will never make as much (if any) effort to remove an illegal man in the ring from the heel team as he does with one from the face man, leaving the faces always in peril.
- Never grab the ropes to prevent a sunset flip. The referee will always kick your hands off of them.
- If you're a heel, don't shove the ref. He may be small, but he can knock you down with a shove back.
- That move (almost) never works! Promote this thread! | | Copaup
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| #2 Posted on 25.2.02 1955.43 Reposted on: 25.2.09 1959.04 | --being thrown bodily into ropes will cause you to immediately turn and run full speed in the opposite direction until you run into your opponent.
--steel steps weigh "500 lbs"
--all metal objects are made of steel, even "wobbly" ones
--the human body can survive being thrown off hieghts onto concrete, being piledriven, being hit with a steel chair, or even run over by a vehicle, but shots with aluminom foil pie plates are devestating.
| Sec19Row53
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| #3 Posted on 25.2.02 2154.36 Reposted on: 25.2.09 2159.11 | - any title belt shot hurts worse than any chair shot | MoeGates
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| #4 Posted on 25.2.02 2217.04 Reposted on: 25.2.09 2229.03 | The more elaborate the entrance, the more the wrestler loses.
Moe | Swordsman Yen
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| #5 Posted on 25.2.02 2253.04 Reposted on: 25.2.09 2259.08 | - Spitting into your hand gives you a much more devastating punch. Also, doing a worm dance gives you a stronger karate chop.
- Bad things will always happen if you have a wedding in a wrestling ring.
- Wrestlers must always have their entrance music played whenever they enter the arena.
- The production crew will coincidentally decide not to put up the entrance ramp on the same night a wrestler decides to drive a vehicle into the arena.
- We all know about the Spanish announce table.
- Officials will always immediately show up to break up a fight when a face is attacking a heel, but will take their sweet time (or not even show up) if a heel is attacking a face. Also, officials will never hesitate to immediately step into a catfight.
- Cinderblocks shatter. | ekedolphin
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| #6 Posted on 26.2.02 0225.52 Reposted on: 26.2.09 0226.29 | --If a referee has his back turned and two heels switch places in the interim, he'll always allow it. But if a referee has his back turned and two faces make a legitimate tag, he'll swear it didn't happen and drag the incoming man bodily back to the apron if he has to.
--Doing a long, drawn-out dance will add a lot more power to your elbow drop.
--Piledrivers mean instant death. Especially on concrete.
--Yet, DDTs almost invariably mean nothing more than a near-fall! Unless you're a female fighting a female.
--If a face tries to kill a heel, the announcer will sell it as if it's the greatest thing he's ever seen. But if a heel tries to kill a face, the announcer will say, “THAT SONOFABITCH! THERE WILL BE HELL TOUPEE!”
--If your high-flying move never works, try to do it every time you get a chance, anyway. (Example: Angle's moonsault).
--If you're a bad guy, you're expressly forbidden from doing the 10-punch in the turnbuckle move.
--If you get dropped 50 feet in a car from a forklift, expect to miss two weeks. But if you tear your quadricep, you'll be out for at least eight months. | J. Kyle
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| | Y!: | |
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| #7 Posted on 26.2.02 0357.21 Reposted on: 26.2.09 0359.01 | Salt will leave a misty smoke when thrown.
A red carpet automatically signals at least one authority figure will be physically harmed.
A good man has the strength of 10 evil men.
If you're a jerk and the fans boo that's means you're a heel. However, a jerk who is cheered shall be referred to as "a bad ass" babyface.
Kane's left foot will always hit the ground before his arm hits his opponent in a flying clothesline. | rockdotcom_2.0
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| #8 Posted on 26.2.02 0509.13 Reposted on: 26.2.09 0511.38 | As long as you return to your beer drinking hell raising days of old and use the word "what?" a your catchphrase, No one will remember when you tried to run the company out of business, or when you beat up and humiliated all the announcers or when you nearly cost 25 wrestlers their jobs or when you nearly tried to cripple another man.
As long as you dump your wife and call her a bitch, no one will remember how you drugged her and made her marry you in the first place. or that you just did that to get back at her dad to get back on top of the WWF. Theyll also forget how you conspired to have someone run over the biggest babyface in the history of the industry.
If youre a face and a heel brings a chair or other object in the ring and they try to use it on you and fail, then you can use it on them without penalty. | Catapult
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| #9 Posted on 26.2.02 0538.34 Reposted on: 26.2.09 0557.47 | I always liked to consider the whole thing with wrestlers getting their entrance music/video playing every time they come out(even for unexpected appearances) as that the wrestlers have telepathic control over their entrances.
Look at Warrior's debut in WCW. The commentators were telling us that they had no idea that Warrior was there, that no one in WCW did. So, if no one in WCW knew that Warrior was coming, obviously their production crew couldn't have set up his pyro, they couldn't have made some music for him. Yet Warrior had these things when he appeared. The only answer is that Warrior used his powers to create that entrance for himself.
Of course any wrestler can do this. How do wrestlers get their music played just as they're coming out to interrupt someone's promo? How does the nWo turn whatever's on the screen black & white right before their entrance?
Well, that was a drawn out reply. The point is that wrestlers have powers that give them control over the production of the show for the minute or so it takes them to come out. | dMp
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| #10 Posted on 26.2.02 0613.31 Reposted on: 26.2.09 0629.01 | Ekedolphin said: --If a referee has his back turned and two heels switch places in the interim, he'll always allow it.
He forgot: The heel is required to do an obvious and loud slap onto his own hand.
Refs never notice a foot on the rope until they count 2,5.
Heel groups always attack one face black ninja style.
When a heel does a submission move like the abdominal stretch the ref will suspect he cheats but not see it until the 3rd time, when he violently kicks his feet off the ropes.
Referees always point at their batch just in case the wrestler confuses them with their opponent.
When a special referee does a heel deed he will always dutifully count until two..then look defiantly at the wrestler.
Referees have cheap contact lenses.
Once a wrestling relationship breaks up, the woman will always say the man 'came up short' while indicating a small object between her fingers.
(edited by dMp on 26.2.02 1315) | ekedolphin
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| #11 Posted on 26.2.02 0645.42 Reposted on: 26.2.09 0659.02 | “Black ninja style?” Does that mean they attack the face one at a time, and get beat down each in his own turn?
If so, yeah, you're right. Unless the heels in question are either nWo or D-Generation X. In which case they'll do it for awhile, then wise up and use foreign objects. LOL!
Here are a couple others:
--If you're a heel champion, you cannot simply walk out of a title defense, retaining the belt by countout.
--If you're a face, that thought wouldn't even occur to you.
--The last person to get beat up by his PPV opponent before the PPV ends up winning at that PPV. (In most cases, that is).
--If you're a member of “an invading federation”, you're still able to come to your rival federation's shows, despite the fact that you're not under contract (wink, wink).
--“Retirement” is wrestling lingo for six months' paid vacation.
--If you're unhappy with a referee's call, simply knock him out-- you won't get disqualified.
--A wrestler notorious for cheating is going to find a way to cheat-- despite any precautions made by the referee. (Example: William Regal).
--Sleeper holds never work, unless your name is Roddy Piper.
--The biggest guy in the fed is usually the guy who loses the most.
--Attempt to kill your hated rival, and you'll be rewarded with a World Title shot at the next PPV. (Example: Steve Austin, Survivor Series and Armageddon 2000).
--Along the same line-- the easiest way to turn heel is to align yourself with someone who recently tried to end your career.
--The young, idealistic babyface will get constantly duped by the same person over and over and over and over. (Example: Sting's multiple alliances with Ric Flair).
And while I'm thinking of this, you know... being a face has its advantages.
If you're a face...
--You can reverse figure-four leglocks every time someone puts one on you!
--You never, ever submit to anything!
--You can only be pinned if you're unconscious!
--You can kick out of the heel's finishing move as many times as you want!
--In a tag-team match, when your beaten-down partner makes the hot tag, you can clean house every time!
--You can refer to announcers as hermaphrodites and get cheered for it!
--If you're vying for the World Title at the biggest card of the year, you almost always win!
--You can change an ordinary four-letter word into the most annoying catchphrase of the year-- chanted 5,340,502 times every night-- and sell millions of T-shirts with that word! | WTF13
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| #12 Posted on 26.2.02 0741.40 Reposted on: 26.2.09 0745.58 | I've seen faces get disqualified for clobbering heels with the heels' foreign objects, but not as often as I used to see it. It used to be a pretty common screwjob finish.
If both participants are down on the mat, the ref will start counting, but will never reach 10.
The Robert Gibson rule: If someone gets a hot tag in a tag match, they are able to beat the crap out of all members of the opposing team, even if no one on that team has gotten any significant amount of punishment for the last several minutes.
Russian leg sweeps only hurt the receiver of the move, even though both people are basically doing the same thing.
Submission moves hurt more if you put your hand on the rope while applying them.
And what I think is the grandaddy of them all---If you block your opponent's punch, they are NOT allowed to block yours when you punch back! | dMp
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| #13 Posted on 26.2.02 0749.02 Reposted on: 26.2.09 0749.31 | Yes, 'black ninja' refers to the one by one attack. the nWo did it too, with Sting. Even heel tag teams.. (the 'house of fire hot tag guy' never gets double teamed')
I got some more.. And btw, I am trying to stay away from things that have happened only once or twice (like running over folks)..or even things that seem to happen to one person only. just addressing the super big cliches here.
Any wrestler that makes his federation debut in the crowd is treated as if he/she is not with the federation yet, and gets signed a while later.
If a wrestler has to resort to buying tickets to enter the building, he always manages to get first row seats..
Stables always break up violently. Never do they decide just to try on their own.
When a heel wrestler beats up his heel manager he becomes a face. When a heel manager has his heel wrestler beaten by others the manager stays a heel. the beaten wrestler becomes a face.
When in doubt, always blame a McMahon. They must be involved somehow!
Whenever a person has an annoying/scrupules/clever character, the online wrestling community starts believing that is how the person really is, all the time.
Somehow this routine always takes place: (w=wrestler) w1 does a shoulder/hip trow block --> w2 punches in the stomach of w1-->w2 puts leg in neck of w1-->w1 stands up-->w2 does a backflip onto his feet.
When a heel holds down a face for his partner to hit, the face ducks and the heels hit eachother.
When two heels in opposite corners try to throw the faces into one another, the faces reverse and the heels collide.
Never ever does a face valet interfere by showing her body parts. Only heels do this.
When face allies who have heat with eachother clear the ring of heels they back into eachother and turn, ready to fight some more. What follows is at least 5 seconds of tension while the crowd goes crazy..
Mark Eaton spends half of the average show standing as his seat is being smashed into someone's face.
| Nate The Snake
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| #14 Posted on 26.2.02 1039.20 Reposted on: 26.2.09 1039.43 |
Originally posted by dMp
Referees always point at their batch just in case the wrestler confuses them with their opponent.
Okay, yeah, sure, it's a typo, but it still gave me this horrible picture of a ref pointing at his area, and the wrestlers only being able to tell one another apart by looking at each other's crotches...
So.
EW! | Big Bad
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| #15 Posted on 26.2.02 1204.14 Reposted on: 26.2.09 1205.17 | A dropkick that connects will injure your opponent and you'll be fine. If you miss a dropkick, however, it hurts you badly. | Swordsman Yen
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| #16 Posted on 26.2.02 1216.50 Reposted on: 26.2.09 1221.19 | If Wrestler A throws a chair at Wrestler B, Wrestler B will catch the chair and hold it in front of his face. Wrestler A will then kick the chair and in turn smack Wrestler B with it. | MoeGates
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| #17 Posted on 26.2.02 1248.34 Reposted on: 26.2.09 1249.52 | The Robert Gibson rule: If someone gets a hot tag in a tag match, they are able to beat the crap out of all members of the opposing team, even if no one on that team has gotten any significant amount of punishment for the last several minutes.
To add to this: No matter how badly beaten up a face wrestler is, all he needs to recover is a tag his partner and about 5 seconds.
| BDC
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| #18 Posted on 26.2.02 1255.47 Reposted on: 26.2.09 1259.05 |
Originally posted by dMp Never ever does a face valet interfere by showing her body parts. Only heels do this.
Most of the unwritten rules have been completely stupid, wrong, or have happened like...once, so as to eliminate it from being considered a rule.
For example, the above "rule." To disprove its validity, I'll start with one of the most famous body part showings of all-time (and the first that I can recall), and it was by a face valet.
At Summerslam '88, it was the Mega-Powers vs. the Mega-Bucks. As Ted Dibiase was on the verge of victory, the beautiful and innocent Miss Elizabeth hopped on the apron, whipped off her skirt, revealing red "panties" (they looked like cheerleader bloomers, to be honest), causing Dibiase and Andre the Giant to become distracted, allowing for the dramatic comeback win for Hogan and Savage. For the Rock N Wrestling Era, it was tremendous.
Other face valet skin showers include Sable, The Kat, and...ummm, Mae Young.
Here's another stupid one:
originally posted by Swordsman Yen If Wrestler A throws a chair at Wrestler B, Wrestler B will catch the chair and hold it in front of his face. Wrestler A will then kick the chair and in turn smack Wrestler B with it.
I mean, how is this an unwritten rule? When does anyone besides RVD ever do this? You're just describing a wrestling move, not a rule.
BDC | MonteCarl
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| #19 Posted on 26.2.02 1304.12 Reposted on: 26.2.09 1329.01 | A title belt is the hardest thing in the world to be hit with
A double-axe handle off the top rope is no big deal and is easily kicked out of unless you are pinning an opponent and another wrestler hits you with one allowing your opponent to then roll you over and score the pinfall on you
--Monte N | ges7184
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| #20 Posted on 26.2.02 1325.02 Reposted on: 26.2.09 1329.09 | * This rule used to be more valid a few years ago, before the WWF main eventers developed multiple finishing moves:
If you apply a finishing move on your oppenent, but your opponent kicks out, you will lose, particularly if you are a heel. However, if you then also kick out of the opponent's finisher, all bets are off.
* If you spend any time wrestling in Memphis, you WILL lose to Jerry Lawler. It's not only a rule, it's the law!
* Foriegn objects pulled out of your tights are always effective, and can never be found by the referee. These objects are effective even if they are imaginary.
* If you roll over while locked up by your opponent in a figure-four, the pain will shift to your opponent. However, if the opponent can roll you both back onto your backs, the pain will once again shift back to you. You can never actually win a match by reversing a figure-four, usually your opponent will immediately get to the ropes or release the hold.
* A jobber will always duck his head immediately when attempting a back bodydrop, allowing his opponent plenty of time to counter. |
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