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The 7 - Guest Columns - WCW Monday Nitro: September 25, 1995
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#1 Posted on 23.8.03 2019.25
Reposted on: 23.8.10 2019.53
Crushing the competition – Master Blaster #1 does indeed appear to be the sexiest man in wrestling according to the poll at Shooting Star Press… He defeats Kevin Nash, Diesel, Oz, Vinny Vegas, and Super Shredder. Congratulations to Master Blaster #1. I asked #2 to comment, but he simply growled like a Dog.

I’d be shot if I didn’t mention that at the aforementioned website is an interesting piece that you’ve likely never seen the likes of before. Bill Gilman is a writer, and often concentrates his focus on scripts and short novels. A big wrestling fan – he’s taken to writing a fictional e-novel about a wrestler named Paul Leonard, and covers his highs and lows. It should be VERY neat to follow to say the least. Chapter 1 is up – and they will continue every Thursday or Friday according to Bill.

Let’s continue our historical look at the early days of WCW Nitro.

Opening credits have been changed to put Lex Luger in place of Vader.

We are LIVE – however, from where apparently remains a mystery all night as it’s never mentioned. ERIC BISCHOFF, BOBBY HEENAN, MONGO MCMICHAEL, and PEPE call the action. Well…not so much Pepe.

ALEX WRIGHT vs. DISCO INFERNO

When Dancing Fools collide… Oh, I guess I’m getting about 3 years ahead of myself. This is Disco’s debut after weeks of anticipation. Disco attacks Alex before the bell and takes him down. There’s an elbowdrop, and Disco throws Alex to the floor. Alex gets back to the apron – headbutts Disco in the stomach, and hits a missile dropkick. Spinning heel kick (Bischoff: spinning…jumping…wheel kick!) – into a cover, and Alex gets 2. Disco gets dumped, and hit with a plancha. Back in – Alex does cartwheels and winds up hit with a Stun Gun and fist drops. Back elbow smash – and Disco hammers away. Armdrag from Alex – but Disco comes back with a flying forearm, and dances to boos. The natural charisma could have carried Disco to Honky Tonk Man levels of heat at the time – I shit you not… The fans already hate his guts, and the announcers are mighty sick of him. Short arm clothesline – and Disco goes to the top. Alex manages to cut him off with a dropkick that somehow sends Disco back inside (I’m still trying to figure out the physics there) – and Alex takes over with punches. Flying back elbow smash gets 2 from Alex, and a backslide finishes. (4:02) *1/2 Disco throws a FIT, telling the referee Wright used the tights. It matters not, and Disco drops it fairly quickly.

Oh dear god… JIMMY HART is in the back, and has THE HULKAROO doing bends with an anvil on his head – to strengthen the neck. To re-enforce the fact that he’s Really Hurt, he wears an exaggerated neck brace. The kind you might see a wrestling promoter wear at a trial. Jimmy talks about stirring it up – and Hogan declares he’s not dead. He threatens to take off his neckbrace, but Jimmy tells him not to. The Giant is stinky sez Hogan! But look out ya Big Nasty Giant – Hulk Hogan is coming back. And he’s got a bigger, stronger monster truck than Giant had at Fall Brawl. Apparently, because of this, he feels they should have a Monster Truck Match. I won’t even comment now, I’ll wait until I get to Halloween Havoc to cover THAT. And – if Giant’s not too tuckered out from driving around a rooftop, perhaps he’d like to wrestle for the World Title later on. If the challenge is accepted, the largest arms in the world will prove he’s still the man. “You’ll be laid to rest, right next to your father.” Okay, now we’re getting just a TAD sadistic. “Whatcha gonna do Big Stinky Nasty Giant, when the largest arms in the world destroy you?”

This segment is brought to you by Wrigley’s Spearmint Gum – for all you Big Stinky Nasty Giants of the world.

Promotional consideration paid for by Slick 50, Street Fighter: The Movie, and SNAP INTO A MACHO MEAT STICK.

MEAN GENE gets ringtime. He wants to take us back to last week – where Savage and Luger went nose to nose. Both drop a bombshell – they want to be World champ. It sure shocked me that wrestlers would want the belt. A fight nearly erupts – but Gene threatens them both, and they back off. We come back live – and RANDY SAVAGE is in the ring, calling out Luger. Well, speak of the devil, here’s LEX LUGER. Luger hits the ring, and informs Savage anyone who wants a piece of him can’t be too concerned about their health – and challenges him for next week, live on Nitro. “I LIKE THAT!” Luger, however, wants to make it interesting. If he can’t beat Savage, he’ll leave WCW. Savage accepts, and smartly does not put HIS career on the line.

LIVE – OCTOBER 29 – MACHINE vs. MACHINE – HALLOWEEN HAVOC!

KURASAWA (with Colonel Robert Parker) vs. SERGEANT CRAIG PITTMAN

Blah. Pittman spears Kurasawa twice, and delivers a standing armbar. Kurasawa comes back and drops Pittman over the top – then dropkicks him off the apron. To the floor – Kurasawa removes the pads and drops him on it with a Northern Lights Suplex! OW! “That splattered like Grandma out of the wheelchair!” I’ll let YOU figure out which of our awesome three dropped that one. Back in – Kurasawa works over the arm, and kicks away at the shoulder. Kurasawa charges – but Pittman ducks and our Japanese friend flies over the top rope. Pittman slams Kurasawa into the ring apron arm first – and then does a standing armbar over the top rope back in. Headbutts follow – as does an overhead belly to belly. Code Red – but Kurasawa makes the rope! Kurasawa tries a submission – but Pittman hits a gutwrench suplex – tries a second, but there’s a standing switch, Kurasawa hits the German with a bridge – and scores the awkward 3. (4:25) ** Not a bad match, FAR better than I expected anyway.

COMING UP: Randy Savage and Kevin Sullivan.

We’re back – and MEAN GENE is surrounded by awesomeness – in the form of BRIAN PILLMAN and ARN ANDERSON. Pillman announces that Ric Flair has hit an all time low due to his loss to Arn. Flair’s apparently gone looking for a partner to take on Anderson and Pillman at Halloween Havoc, but can’t find one. Gene accuses Anderson of pre-planning the attack at Fall Brawl. Arn says he’s known Flair for 15 years – and the better man won. “Remember the formula ring, if ya jump on me, you jump on us!” Flair’s asked Randy Savage for help – the same man who’s father he slapped in the mouth. He’s asked for Sting, the man he’s attempted to cripple. Arn says he can’t imagine why Flair’s having a hard time figuring out why he can’t get a partner. “For 10 years Ric, you ran over everyone but you had me to back you up. What goes around comes around.”

This week on WCW Saturday Night – Dusty Rhodes makes his debut as the co-host, Johnny B Badd takes on Sting for the US Title for his win at Fall Brawl, The American Males will be there, Kevin Sullivan and The Giant will speak, and Hogan may as well.

Here’s that package from Randy Savage getting attacked on the beach by Kevin Sullivan. Thankfully this time it’s clipped and we don’t have to see Fun In The Sun Flair again.

KEVIN SULLIVAN vs. RANDY SAVAGE

ZODIAK BOULDER joins us at ringside immediately for fun. Savage, as he typically does, goes nuts and chases Sullivan around the ring. This gives Zodiak a chance to attack from behind and throw Savage into the ringpost. Back in, Sullivan takes over with Exciting Offence! It’s so exciting, they wind up on the floor and Savage gets crotched on the guardrail. A clothesline knocks him off, and Sullivan follows with something resembling an idea of what a baseball slide dropkick might look like if you were hitting it from a nearly vertical angle and missing by 6 feet. Savage, ever a champion, sells. Back in the ring, Savage continues taking the punching and stomping – before being thrown back out again. Savage backdrops him off a charge and rolls him back in. A double axehandle from the top connects – and Savage throws him back out, but only so he can pull Zodiak in. He beats up on Zodiak – and the referee requests politely he cease. This is Randy Savage you’re talking to however, and Savage launches the ref to a HUGE pop! That would be a DQ. (2:58) DUD Savage nails Zodiak with a Big Elbow for the hell of it – but before Sullivan can taken any punishment, THE GIANT hits the ring. CHOKESLAM! Savage needs help – and help is here in the form of FRANKIE LANCASTER. Fucking forget it – CHOKESLAM! More help? MARK STARR! CHOKESLAM! A big pop signals a star is here… ALEX WRIGHT. He comes off the top right into a bear hug and CHOKESLAM! Hee hee, this segment is all kinds of awesome. LEX LUGER’s next, and everyone wonders who he’s here to help? Sullivan’s all grins – but Luger attacks The Giant. Fool, eat a CHOKESLAM! Sullivan makes unhappy faces about the fact Giant attacked Luger.

Promotional consideration brought to you by Crossfire, Hot Pockets, and Big A.

Coming up right after Nitro – stick around for Karate Cop! “Or go play with your dolls.” I have no idea where the hell Mongo comes up with this stuff.

MENG vs. LEX LUGER

Hahahaha, Meng sprints down to the ring because Luger just took the chokeslam moments ago. He hammers on Luger – and chokes him in the ropes.

THIS JUST IN: Hulk Hogan is watching Nitro.

Meng hits a spike piledriver, 1, 2, Luger kicks out? Heh, the WWE has taught me not to take piledrivers for granted. Good for them. Snap suplex into a cover for 2. Meng applies the shoulder pinch of severe discomfort. Luger fights back for second before taking a gutwrench suplex for 2. Meng with a nice looking leg drop for 2. The rear chinlock is worked – but with the help from the fans, Luger is able to fight to his feet, just in time to take a throat jab and Samoan drop. I think this is my favorite match ever. Here come the chops! Luger is whipped across the ring – Meng charges, and eats boot. Crap. Another boot – Meng is down. Running clothesline connects in the corner, and Luger stomps away. The referee pulls him off, and Meng grabs a spike from his pants! (Err….) Luger turns – Meng spikes him in the face – Luger goes down, cover, 1, 2, 3!!! (6:45) **1/4 Bischoff hopes Nick Bockwinkle saw that. Hell, I hope EVERYONE saw that – MENG BEATS LUGER! MENG BEATS LUGER!

This segment is brought to you by McDonalds.

The announcers wrap things up, talking about Luger. They’re not sure why Luger would leave the WWF to come to WCW and fight in a match right off the bat where he could wind up leaving. Heenan figures something’s up.

NEXT WEEK: Hulk Hogan is here, so are The American Males, The Nasty Boys, Dean Malenko, and the main event is of course Lex Luger vs. Randy Savage.
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#2 Posted on 23.8.03 2047.44
Reposted on: 23.8.10 2049.35
"I asked #2 to comment, but he simply growled like a Dog."

... I think my neighbors might be a little annoyed at me right now for laughing rather loudly.

Old Nitro kicks ass. So, how much longer until you get through them all?

"Hell, I hope EVERYONE saw that – MENG BEATS LUGER! MENG BEATS LUGER!"

And as I'm sure you know, that sure wasn't the only time! I seem to recall this guy sitting beside me at WCW Mayhem '99 being the only one in the building screaming at the top of his lungs when Meng won. I would have joined in with the guy, but I don't like yelling.

Brilliant recap. Do more.
cfgb
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#3 Posted on 23.8.03 2053.24
Reposted on: 23.8.10 2055.44
Old Nitro kicks ass. So, how much longer until you get through them all?

15 years.

And as I'm sure you know, that sure wasn't the only time! I seem to recall this guy sitting beside me at WCW Mayhem '99 being the only one in the building screaming at the top of his lungs when Meng won. I would have joined in with the guy, but I don't like yelling.

I was VERY pleasantly surprised. It was either Meng or Sid - and it turned out everyone liked Sid that night, so Meng needed an extra boost.

Thank god for TNA or I wouldn't have any of those luvable guys no one else likes. (Abyss - I'm looking at you!)
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#4 Posted on 24.8.03 1353.56
Reposted on: 24.8.10 1355.33
Think you'll still be interested in wrestling in 15 years? And, best of all, might there not be... NEW Nitro to review in 15 years?!? That'd be awesome.

And yeah, Sid was pretty over. Though, I seem to remember another guy a few seats over standing up and doing the Goldberg chant all by himself. It was pretty sad to see him being just about the only one doing so.

I also remember hearing mention of a Raw house show the night before Mayhem that sold MORE tickets than the WCW PPV. I wouldn't be suprised if the tickets were about the same price as well.

And thinking of lovable guys no one else likes, WHERE THE HELL IS KNOBBS?!? He should so totally get picked up by TNA. But I think we can skip The Dog for now.
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