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The 7 - Guest Columns - Raw Booking Sheet-5/5/03
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#1 Posted on 4.5.03 1125.33
Reposted on: 4.5.10 1126.37
Continuing our alternative journey towards Judgement Day, we head into this weeks Raw after an intriguing week of programming: RAW General manager announced a mini-tournament to decide the competitors for a no.1 contendership Elimination Chamber at the pay-per-view....Rob van Dam revealed his new agent to be Paul Heyman-leaving his tag team partner Kane slightly peeved...Chief Morley promised to hurt the Dudleyz at every possible turn after their attack at Backlash....Booker beat Ric Flair to advance to the Elimination Chamber...And, after riling up Bill Goldberg, Jericho did the same with a tainted victory over Kevin Nash: Infuriated with “The King Of The World”, Goldberg charged the ring, but ended up spearing “Big Sexy” by accident.

WWE RAW-5/5/03

-IN a shocking pre-credits opening, a shaky hand-held camera opens proceedings as production crews rush to a breaking story backstage: Lying unconscious with a badly bleeding forehead, Bill Goldberg certainly doesn’t seem in any condition for his show-opening Elimination Chamber Qualifier. But there’s a bigger story here, too: The “accident” seems to have taken place right outside Kevin Nash’s locker room. Coach promises an update as the show rolls the opening montage....

-With the show opening proper over and done with, the ring is graced by the presence of Scott Steiner decked out in full ring gear. Procuring a microphone from ringside, Big Poppa Pump explains in his own inimitable way that since his scheduled opponent, Goldberg, is out of action, he may as well throw out the challenge to anyone who wants a shot at the Elimination Chamber. He waits a few seconds...and is soon greeted by the Harvard fight song! Chris Nowinski, obviously feeling lucky after his win over test a week previous, struts to the ring and goes straight to work, whaling away on Steiner. Sadly, his cocky spirit is crushed right out of the gate with a massive belly-to-belly from his foe. Steiner spends the next few minutes tossing the Tough Enough alumni around with ease, and Nowinski concentrates on just barely getting his shoulder up for each cover. Things change at the five-minute mark, however; as Steiner seems set to finish things with his patented Recliner, two figures appear at the top of the ramp. Dragging his clearly unhappy girlfriend, Test stares angrily at Steiner, and the big man returns the look. Dropping his designated sacrificial lamb, Steiner goes to leave the ring-and that’s when test shoves Stacy into the ringsteps, knocking her down and out. Steiner makes a wild grab for him, but gets pulled back into the ring with a schoolboy by Nowinski....for the three count! Jumping up and down with glee, Nowinski runs quickly out through the crowd, but Steiner is already on his feet and heading for Test. The Canadian ducks a single shot, however, and levels his enemy with one punch. Coach and King are stunned, but the answer becomes clear: Holding his fist up triumphantly, test strips off a small metal chain wrapped across his knuckles. He drapes the fallen Stacy over Steiner and, yelling incoherently, backs up the ramp as the show goes to a break...

-Coming back from commercials, Coach and The King give a quick recap of Steiner and Stacy being helped from ringside, then inform us that the still-unconscious Goldberg is being tended to by medical staff backstage. We cut back to the ring as Christian enters, ready for a match with the stuttering Goldust. The match is a fairly standard affair, with Christian getting a quick win in three minutes or so with the Unprettier. What is unusual, however, is Christian’s post-match announcement: With eight tag team titles, the intercontinental belt, a European championship reign and a Hardcore title win-at WrestleMania, no less-he has been judged worthy of General Manager Bischoff’s fantastic tournament. Come next week, he’s got a qualifying match. And then from there, it’s just two short steps to the big belt, baby....

-Following Rodney Mack’s reprehensible actions the prior week, Hurricane gets revenge for his fallen friend Trish with a win over the Theodore Long protege-but from a surprising source. Mack smashes ‘Cane around with his limited power arsenal for four minutes, and with Jazz and Long at ringside ‘Cane’s glimpses of offence are soon lost thanks to timely outside interference. But, when the referee hits the deck and Jazz takes advantage for a spot of double teaming, the lights mysteriously black out. The Hurricane’s super-music fills the arena-and when the arena is re-illuminated, a familiar female figure is perched on the top turnbuckle: The resurrected Mighty Molly soars from the third level, smashing Jazz down and drawing Mack’s attention away enough for ‘Cane to rise to his feet. The bulky heel gives chase to the superhero’s sidekick, who runs through Long with a clothesline on the floor-and, as the two re-enter the ring, ‘Cane strikes on his opponent with a goozle. With the ref groggily to his feet ‘Cane finishes the match in six minutes with a massive chokeslam, and the reunited heroes celebrate in the ring...

-The second Elimination Chamber Qualifier is up next, with the freshly evil-minded Test falling at the first hurdle to Shawn Michaels. The legendary former WWE Champion puts away his opponent with a quick superkick after just three minutes. Seeing red, Test tries to level HBK after the decision, but Michaels is too quick and escapes unscathed, heading to Judgement Day for another shot at superstardom...

-And, following that short match, the show heads into it’s first non-wrestling segment, as Triple H, with Ric Flair in tow, strolls to the ring for a chat session. Clad in smooth suit and shades and sporting his flowing locks in all their glory, the champ addresses last week’s events, proclaiming the show worse off for “lack of Hunter”. Well, he’s been to see Eric Bischoff, and now he can announce that it’ll never happen again. Not only has he been gifted this time slot, he’s also procured tonight’s main event to use as he sees fit. And, seeing as there’s no-one around worthy enough to face him in a one-on-one match, he plans to use it simply to entertain the fans with his speech-making abilities. Unfortunately for the champion, some people have other plans: Booker T’s music fires up and the five-time former World Champion appears at the top of the ramp, microphone in hand. HHH believes that no-one’s on his level? Everybody knows that’s a crock. Booker beats H’s monkey (Flair) last week, so how about he goes a step further and knock off the organ grinder? A clearly rattled Helmsley quickly backtracks on his statement, and points out his WrestleMania victory; but if Booker’s so desperate to compete, how about a tag team match? Booker walks slowly down the ramp as he nods his head, but questions H’s logic: If it’s a tag team match, who’s your significant other? Surely not the has-been holding his coat-tails. No sooner have the words left his mouth than, like a streak of lightning, a chair-wielding Chris Jericho flies down the ramp, smashing Booker in the back. Jericho screeches that he’ll be happy to partner the man he’ll face for the world champ in two months’ time, as the heels prep for a beatdown-but they’re stopped in their tracks as a familiar drawling music fires up. Kevin Nash power-walks to the ring, face set in a mask of determination, and the three bad guys promptly scatter as their enemies regroup. It looks like we have our main event: Chris Jericho & Triple H Vs. Kevin Nash & Booker T.

-Following a quick break in proceedings, we return to find another unwelcome presence in the ring: Paul Heyman, a mic in his hand and a smirk on his face, welcomes viewers back. He knows that everybody’s surprised to see him cropping up on Raw, but he’s got news: He’s not signed to any WWE contract, he’s simply signed to wrestlers. He can set up camp wherever he so desires. And he’s chosen to come back to his original-and best-creation: R-V-D. He’s noticed that Rob-and his sidekick Kane-hadn’t been faring well in this cut-throat world and, with opportunities drying up elsewhere, he was happy to lend his services to such a promising superstar. So without further ado, he gives you: His client, Rob van Dam, and his partner, Kane. The two tag team champions make their usual separate entrances, and Kane stays distant as Heyman shares a pre-match pep talk with van Dam. The bout itself is little more than a squash, as the new-and sorely inexperienced-pairing of Spike Dudley and Maven fall victim to Two frog splashes each. Kane seems at odds with his partner’s overly violent approach, but for now he’s happy to get his hand raised by the ref-as Heyman does the honors for van Dam...

-We head backstage and Terri manages to grab a few words with the seething Kevin Nash. he hasn’t forgotten what Hunter did to him at Backlash, and even though he’s out of the Elimination Chamber, he’s going to grab the opportunity tonight and make sure he leaves his mark...

-In the penultimate match of the night, Chief Morley sets out to make good on his promise to the Dudleys, as D-Von is annihilated by the three-man squad of Rico and 3-Minute Warning. Morley watches contentedly from the top of the ramp, and applauds the destruction of the half-brother-but, in a massive turn-around, he’s smacked to the ground in a surprise attack by Bubba Dudley! He kicks the Chief Of Staff down the ramp as Lance Storm arrives to save his partner-but an errant swing leads to ass-cracking Bubba Bomb off the stage and through a table. Bubba helps his badly-beaten partner to the back, as the crowd applauds the revenge gained on the heels...

-And, in the main event match, Triple H makes good on his word by gaining a major pin over Kevin Nash. The match runs long-about thirteen minutes-with Booker taking the majority of the beatings from the heel side. He manages a hot tag at around the ten-minute mark and all Hell breaks loose, with Booker even landing a sidekick on the interfering Ric Flair. But as Nash looks set to finish things with the Jacknife, things go horribly wrong: Goldberg’s bass-fuelled entrance music fills the arena, and the man himself staggers to the ring, head wrapped in bloodstained gauze. A disbelieving Nash stares dumbfounded, wondering what to expect-and, with the ref busy on the outside, he gets his answer: Goldberg smashes “Big Sexy” down with the second spear in two weeks-but this time it’s deliberate. The dazed Triple H looks confused, and he should be-for Goldberg, blood pumping in his ears, levels him with a massive tackle too! The clearly-wounded megastar staggers up the ramp, shouting “I know it was you, Nash!”, as Hunter crawls over for the winning three-count. Jericho and Flair beat down Booker on the outside and rejoin their team-mate in the ring, and with Goldberg gone into the backstage area, the heels stand triumphant at the end of the show....
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