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23.7.07 0312
The 7 - Movies & TV - The WIcker Man
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StaggerLee
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#1 Posted on 2.9.06 1400.02
Reposted on: 2.9.13 1401.48
Saw this yesterday. Quite possible that it may replace THE LADY IN THE WATER as the worst movie I have ever seen. The story was BAD, the script was BAD, the acting was HORRIBLE, the 'twist' you could see a mile away. How does Nick Cage still get star billing when he hasnt made a GOOD movie in about a decade or so?

Skip it, even when its on DVD.

It was so bad, I was thinking "Tom Servo should make an appearance at any moment"

(edited by StaggerLee on 2.9.06 1400)
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CRZ
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#2 Posted on 2.9.06 1404.16
Reposted on: 2.9.13 1406.23
Have you seen the original?
Will you see the original?

EDIT: Just checked Amazon, and apparently the original is still too hard to get around here. There's a chopped up version (The W at Amazon) which Anchor Bay rereleased a few weeks ago, but you should skip THAT one too - the "director's cut" is still only available as a UK edition, and THAT will be rereleased THIS week (amazon.co.uk). I guess....watch the pee-two-pee sites later this week for rips of the UK limited edition or get a player that can handle Region 2 DVDs?

(edited by CRZ on 2.9.06 1414)
StaggerLee
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#3 Posted on 2.9.06 1414.05
Reposted on: 2.9.13 1414.05
I saw the original years ago, it was spooky to me at the time. But then again, I used to be afraid of the Friday the 13th movies as well.

Not sure how I'd compare the two, except to say that Britt Ekland is ten times hotter than Kate Beahan as Willow.

Nic Cage is HORRIFIC in this movie. Simply unbelievable and out of his element.

Super Shane Spear
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#4 Posted on 2.9.06 1414.38
Reposted on: 2.9.13 1415.15
    Originally posted by StaggerLee
    How does Nick Cage still get star billing when he hasnt made a GOOD movie in about a decade or so?


Funny, I coulda swore that Adaptation, Matchstick Men and Lord of War all came out within the last four.

StaggerLee
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#5 Posted on 2.9.06 1416.00
Reposted on: 2.9.13 1416.02
I havent seen LORD OF WAR, but I wasnt terribly impressed with Matchstick Men or Adaptation.

Super Shane Spear
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#6 Posted on 2.9.06 1443.58
Reposted on: 2.9.13 1447.18
    Originally posted by StaggerLee
    I havent seen LORD OF WAR, but I wasnt terribly impressed with Matchstick Men or Adaptation.




No, I wouldn't imagine so. You do seem like a critic that is hard to impress, judging by your in-depth reviews on this very site.


    Originally posted by StaggerLee
    Current Wicker Man Review: "The story was BAD, the script was BAD, the acting was HORRIBLE, the 'twist' you could see a mile away. ... Nic Cage is HORRIFIC in this movie. Simply unbelievable and out of his element."

    Lady in the Water Review: "Quite possibly the biggest piece of shit ever filmed. I hated it. ... It has a grass dog, evil monkeys, sea nymphs, magic blue mud and a guy convincing a group of people some mystical force is living in thier pool? What a piece of shit."

    Superman Returns Review: "This movie should have been titled 'Lois Lane gets in more trouble'. I mean I know it's supposed to be about him helping her out because of his love for her and whatnot, but jesus, everywhere she turned, she was being nearly killed."

    Hostel Review: "Anybody else see this? I went tonite, not a BAD movie, just not up to the hype it is getting."

    Walk the Line Review: "I just saw this tonite. If Pheonix doesnt WIN the Oscar, then the fix is in. His transformation to Cash was astounding. I never thought he would be any good, since I pretty much hate him in every movie I have ever seen him in. And, Reese should be at least nominated. She was truley suprising and amazing as June Carter. I cant say enough about this movie. It was brilliant."

    Fantastic Four Review: "I thought it was a bit slow on plot, and not being a comic reader, all the interactions seemed well placed. Chicklis grows on me thje more I see him. Hard to believe he was in that god awefull John Belushi biopic. Nice film, nothing great. The sequel should be better, and as long as they keep putting Alba in those spandex-y suits, I will keep showing up."


I'll review Lord of War for you:

Lord of War is a movie about this GUNS dealer. Hes brothers with that guy from 30 seconds to MARS. Cage played a good guns guy. As a matter of fac----Aw fuck it. This movie was SHIT. I thought WICKER man sucked, but this isthe worst movie EVERRRRRRRR!

(author's note: I'm only 45% serious here. I'm cranky today.)
JustinShapiro
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#7 Posted on 2.9.06 1500.23
Reposted on: 2.9.13 1501.39
    Originally posted by StaggerLee
    I wasnt terribly impressed with Matchstick Men or Adaptation.


    Originally posted by StaggerLee
    I dont see the big to-do over Colbert either.


You're dead to me!
SchippeWreck
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#8 Posted on 2.9.06 1515.22
Reposted on: 2.9.13 1516.45
    Originally posted by StaggerLee
    How does Nick Cage still get star billing when he hasnt made a GOOD movie in about a decade or so?

National Treasure was GREAT. (Shut up.)
It's False
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#9 Posted on 2.9.06 2004.26
Reposted on: 2.9.13 2005.53
I personally liked Nic Cage in "Gone In 60 Seconds" myself.

But the point remains valid; Nic Cage is WAY out of his element doing a horror flick. Who thought THAT was a good idea?

But with CRZ's continued pimping of the original, I'm a lot more curious to see THAT now than anything else.

(edited by It's False on 2.9.06 1805)
ekedolphin
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#10 Posted on 3.9.06 0042.11
Reposted on: 3.9.13 0046.40
Yeah, Lord of War didn't go over well with my Blockbuster customers, and it seems NO ONE liked The Weather Man. (I liked him in The Family Man, though.)
Oliver
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#11 Posted on 3.9.06 0244.06
Reposted on: 3.9.13 0248.55
    Originally posted by ekedolphin
    Yeah, Lord of War didn't go over well with my Blockbuster customers, and it seems NO ONE liked The Weather Man. (I liked him in The Family Man, though.)
Probably the only Nic Cage movie I liked was "IT COULD HAPPEN TO YOU". I didn't care for Matchstick Men, and I hated Family Man.

What is it with Cage and headlining movies with "MAN" in the title?
JoshMann
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#12 Posted on 3.9.06 1252.15
Reposted on: 3.9.13 1259.01
    Originally posted by JustinShapiro
      Originally posted by StaggerLee
      I wasnt terribly impressed with Matchstick Men or Adaptation.


      Originally posted by StaggerLee
      I dont see the big to-do over Colbert either.


    You're dead to me!


But was he ON NOTICE first at least?

ON-TOPIC: Also by Nic Cage in the last decade was the forgotten and criminally unappreciated "Bringing Out The Dead".

(edited by JoshMann on 3.9.06 1355)
jfkfc
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#13 Posted on 4.9.06 1034.05
Reposted on: 4.9.13 1034.10
    Originally posted by ekedolphin
    Yeah, Lord of War didn't go over well with my Blockbuster customers, and it seems NO ONE liked The Weather Man. (I liked him in The Family Man, though.)
Personally, I thought The Weather Man, while depressing, was fantastic. Windwalkers was incredible too....and I liked Matchstick Men also.
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