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The 7 - CRZ's World - ECW #12 29.8.6
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#1 Posted on 30.8.06 0244.56
Reposted on: 30.8.13 0245.04
#1 - #2 - #3 - #4 - #5 - #6 - #7 - #8 - #9 - #10 - #11

QUICK QUARTERS:
ecw.060613: 2.6 / 2.9 / 2.9 / 2.7 / 3.2 OVERALL: 2.8
ecw.060620: 2.0 / 2.2 / 2.3 / 2.4 / 2.6 OVERALL: 2.3
ecw.060627: 1.9 / 2.1 / 2.3 / 2.3 / 2.5 OVERALL: 2.2
ecw.060704: 1.3 / 1.4 / 1.4 / 1.5 / 1.9 OVERALL: 1.5
ecw.060711: 2.1 / 2.3 / 2.3 / 2.5 / 2.8 OVERALL: 2.4
ecw.060718: 2.2 / 2.1 / 2.0 / 2.0 / 2.3 OVERALL: 2.1
ecw.060725: 2.2 / 2.2 / 2.3 / 2.5 / 3.0 OVERALL: 2.4
ecw.060801: 2.3 / 2.2 / 2.2 / 2.4 / 2.8 OVERALL: 2.4
ecw.060808: 2.0 / 2.1 / 2.1 / 2.2 / 2.5 OVERALL: 2.2
ecw.060815: 2.2 / 2.2 / 2.2 / 2.1 / 2.5 OVERALL: 2.2
ecw.060822: 2.4 / 2.1 / 2.2 / 2.2 / 2.6 OVERALL: 2.3

Has anyone heard definitively that they've actually renewed this show? I keep looking and looking and I mean, everybody SAYS it's a done deal, but...shouldn't we have seen the official announcement by now?

Anyway, this is the end of MY self-enforced commitment - we'll see if I'm still interested enough to continue next week. (Cash and/or sucking up would certainly tip the scales, if you catch my drift.)

FLASHBACK: Remember Heyman's initial "draft picks?" Kurt Angle and Rob van Dam. Geez, what was HE thinking...

CABLE GUIDE: Sabu continues to stalk the Big Show. (L) TV-14 CC


1.9

LAST WEEK: Sabu and Big Show had a - you know, there's nothing stopping you from reading last week's report except your desire to not click on your mouse just one more time. GO ON, LAZY

TV-14-DLSV - An enormous, sweaty head fills the screen. "My name is PAUL HEYMAN. And I AM the father of Extreme Championship Wrestling. THIS is MY baby. MY concept. ECW - is my LIFE. You know, I've never wrestled in an ECW ring - never had to...until tonight. Tonight, I (Paul Heyman) have been left with no other option but to fight on worldwide live television in an Extreme Rules match. Dr. Frankenstein must destroy his own monster. With these hands....with these hands, I must dismantle my own disciple Sabu. With these hands, I must crush my own monster, I must punish my own child. Tonight - live on ECW, I will PIN Sabu - 1....2....3." Can I just tell you that as soon as he said "Extreme Rules" match, BOTH of us should immediately realise that that means Heyman will NOT be doing any of the work in this match, and thus he probably WILL pin him after it's all said and done? Well, I'd love to speak for YOU, but I can only speak for me. This main event will be BRUTAL. And not in that "good" way, either.

LET THE RATIONALE HIT THE FLOOR

Coming atcher LIVE from the Sovereign Center in Reading, PA 29.8.6 and SAP transmitido en espanol, THIS is ECW on SciFi #12! Let's waste no time...

ROB VAN DAM (Battle Creek, MI - 235 pounds) v. HARDCORE HOLLY (Mobile, AL - 234 pounds - with Let Us Take You Back to Last Week) - STILL seems a little weird to see ANY pyro at an "ECW" event, but surely I should have gotten over that by NOW. Last week, Holly ran out and took a chair to Van Dam, and I immediately logged onto every message board I could find, so OUTRAGED was I at his inability to protect his opponent! It's just a lack of RESPECT! OUTRAGED! RESPECT! And so on. Actually, I didn't do any of that, but I THOUGHT it - and then I thought to myself how smart I was. Van Dam wastes no time going after Holly as soon as he hits the ring - punches are exchanged - yes, Van Dam actually throws a few PUNCHES - but that moves to the whip reversal as Styles proclaims that Holly's "smash mouth style fits perfectly" in ECW and if anybody'd know, surely it's him! Van Dam with the splits, and a monkey flip as Holly bounces off the ropes. Side kick by Van Dam, and clotheslines him outside. Up in the corner - HE POINTS TO HIMSELF!! And now he's out after him - whoops, too late, Holly with a gutshot - forearm across the back - dragged to the barricade...then back out - dueling suplex attempts and Van Dam wins, so I guess they had to find a decent place for Van Dam to place him across the barrier. Back to the apron, but before he can point to himself AGAIN, Extreme Official Scott Armstrong has a few words with him about the rapidly increasing ten count. Van Dam dips a leg into the ring, takes it back out and completes the spinning legdrop across Holly's back. Mini-point. We take an ECW Replay as everybody heads back in. Van Dam with a kick, elbow, climbs the rope and only gets 70% of a Ten Punch Count Along before Holly tries to turn things into the Alabama Slam - Van Dam hangs onto the top rope as Holly moves out, so he's forced to do a 180 - but flips Van Dam over the top and to the floor! Is a man outside the ring? FOLKS, WE'LL BE RIGHT BACK oh no, not this time. Take another ECW Replay as Holly steps out, grabs Van Dam, and rolls him back in. Legdrop by Holly, up for another legdrop, places Van Dam across the second rope for a choke while grabbing the ponytail. Well, he has the chin...I don't know WHAT he's doing now, but Van Dam doesn't like it. Forearm in the back. Forearm over the ropes and across the chest. Another on the chest. A total whiff (which Van Dam dutifully sells). Holly snapmares him over and applies the headlock. Crowd brings Van Dam to his feet - Van Dam elbows out and heads to the ropes, but runs smack dab into The Move Formerly Known As The Best Dropkick in the Business (complete with Holly making the "touchdown" signal afterward). Crowd BOOS. Leg is hooked - 2! Another big crossface by Holly. Van Dam tries the gutshot, but Holly lands two rights and two chops. Van Dam pops up a right, Holly kick, whip is reversed and Van Dam follows in with a flying kick that takes both men down! "RVD" chant. Van Dam off the ropes, clothesline, another off the ropes, superkick, backflip press (!) gets 2. Into the ropes, reversed by Holly, Van Dam up and over, catches the kick, and lands the stepover heel kick. Holly positioned - Van Dam off the ropes, Rolling Thunder lands! He's feeling froggy...but the Five Star Frog Splash MISSES when Holly rolls out of the way! Holly out - Holly decides to bring a chair back in the ring with him. THIS IS NOT AN EXTREME RULES MATCH - swing and a miss by Holly. Spinning heel kick by Van Dam - spinning legdrop - HE has the chair - WHACK - oops, Van Dam just lost. (DQ 5:34) What the hell, let's WHACK 'im again. Holly's outta here. Van Dam follows - won't someone PLEASE get the small children in the front row to move back? Van Dam opts to NOT throw the chair, but does ram it into Holly's head, taking him into the crowd. Van Dam shows off the dented chair as his music plays - yeah, play his music 'cause he LOST!

UP NEXT: BIG SHOW - now THAT is a STACKED LINEUP!

AD BREAK: Geico (Charo)
Dish Network (Tiki Barber)
Ong Bak's Tony Jaa is "The Protector" in theatres Sept. 8
SciFi image spot
(local) Arby's
(local) 2nd Wind
1.8

Exercise Equipment
"Who Wants To Be A Super Hero?"

This week's Canadian fantasy comes to you courtesy the exercycle: "I think it's safe to say that I'm in the peak of my physical condition - and it's time to make my mark in wrestling history...as the most extreme athlete to EVER step foot in an ECW ring. I'm RENE DUPREE. Bon soir." But seriously...are these promos any worse than CM Punk's were?

WELL IT'S THE BIG SHOW heads to the ring, which should give us enough time to watch more than a few clips from 2 Weeks Ago at SummerSlam - and Last Night at RAW. Ah, he's ready now. "Let's set the record straight right now. I am the most dominant champion in WWE history. I went to SummerSlam - I took out DX. I went to RAW last night, and I wiped the RING with DX. Now we have Unforgiven around the corner - Hell in the Cell - the McMahons (Vince & Shane) and me (The Big Show) vs. Shawn Michaels & Triple H (DX). THERE their fate will be sealed. You see, but I know how those two operate. They always wanna mess with somebody's head. Let me give them a little invitation. Shawn Michaels, Triple H, I'm challenging you two, next week, in ECW, in this ring, be a handicap match - DX vs. me (The Big Show). Somebody's heart is gonna get broken, and the King of Kings is gonna bow at my feet, 'cause nobody and I mean NOBODY can beat me." Play his music! Wow, DX in the main event! Sounds like the PERFECT time to stop recapping! Sounds like the perfect time to stop WATCHING!

TONIGHT: Not that Sabu vs. Paul Heyman (and whoever he brings out) in an Extreme Rules Match promises to be any great shakes, either...

UP NEXT: CM PUNK IN ACTION! CALL YOUR MOM!

AD BREAK: SciFi's presentation of "King of the Lost World"
SciFi's "Eureka"
ESPN Fantasy Football on espn.com
Tony Jaa is "The Protector" (again)
TAG Wild Card
"Girls Gone Wild: Ultimate Rush" & "Girls Gone Wild: First Timers"
Gamefly
ESPN Fantasy wait I just saw this ad

Ooh! Ooh! "THE REJECT" SHANNON MOORE! He's - he's going to SPEAK!! "Fight the power." OH MY GOD - can anyone be greater than Moore?

C.M. PUNK (Chicago, IL - 222 pounds) v. STEVEN RICHARDS (Philadelphia, PA - 235 pounds) - OH MY GOD AGAIN. Can you IMAGINE Moore and Punk in the same segment? I am sporting a BONER that could punch a hole in a GIRDER. Despite the graphic stating "Steven," Richards is called "Stevie" by ring announcer JUSTIN JASON JERRY ROBERTS and also referred as such about 90% of the time by our commentary team. But...I guess the trademark is for Steven, so he'll stay Steven as long as the accountants run the company. Anyway, he'll be Punk's toughest challenge, if you believe Styles. LET'S GO! Lockup, hammerlock by Punk, Styles immediately gets his mandatory mentions of Brazilian jiu jitsu and muay thai kickboxing out of the way. Richards drops down with a drop toehold, floatsover and grabs a headlock. Dueling wristlocks, Punk takes control and goes back to the hammerlock, Richards elbows out. Chop by Richards, chpo, chop by Punk, chop, chop, knee by Richards. Knee in the gut, punch in the gut, off the ropes, but Punk sidesteps and Richards goes through the ropes to the floor - Punk's gonna fly - suicide dive through the ropes onto Richards! Richards brought back in but let's take the ECW Replay - hmmm, not as impressive from that angle, sorry - back to live action where Punk is on top but Richards ingeniously superkicks an ankle out from under him and Punk crashes on the top turnbuckle. Richards back in control - snapmares over, but only gets 1. Richards stomps, stomp, stomp, knee to the gut, into the ropes and holding on for the Misawaknee. Another Misawaknee (I should call them Venisknees, since I never saw Misawa do this), and a suplex...gets 2. ECW crawl tells you where to see 'em at a house show. Tazz admires the "ink" while Richards applies a...bearhug from his knees while Punk is standing? Wrestling is not homoerotic! Crowd starts clapping, so Punk fires up and elbows out of this hold. Richards with a gutshot. Punk shot into the ropes, pressed, but Punk dropkicks out! Punk takes advantage - spin kick, straight kick, Euro uppercut, forearm, into the ropes, leg lariat. There was an ECW Replay in here of the dropkick. Whip is reversed by Richardes, head down, butterfly...not suplex but dropped into a backbreaker, and PUNK gets 2. Ricahrds up - slap, slap, Richards ducks the backhand (must have seen him do this IN EVERY MATCH OF HIS SO FAR) and drives Punk into the corner with a shoulder in the gut. Whip into the ropes, Punk manages a rollup for 1. Richards runs into the uranage into the Anaconda vise - yes, THIS is the week I will correctly spell "vise" - and Richards, while game enough to hang on for longer than Credible did, ultimately taps and Extreme Official Mike Posey rings the bell. (4:11) Cameras zoom in on small clumps of impressed fans. Master of the segue Styles proclaims "Punk is on a roll! You know who else is on a roll?"

Here's a Special Video Look at Sabu! He's (word), (word), (word) and (word)! Also, he points to the sky!

TONIGHT: EXTREME RULES Sabu vs. Paul Heyman - if you believe this will actually go down like this, please...let someone else handle your money.

NEXT MONDAY:
1.7

Get this - RAW will feature BOTH the McMahons AND DX! BEST LABOR DAY EVER

AD BREAK: SciFi's "Stargate SG-1 Fan Favorite Marathon"
SciFi's season finale of "Who Wants To Be A Super Hero?"
Burger King (Earl)
TAG body shots
Dish Network
"Saints Row" for the Xbox 360
Jason Statham is "Crank" in theatres Friday

Look at this crowd! NOW look at this special preview of John Cena IS "The Marine" in theatres October 13! If Kelly Carlson doesn't look familiar to you, it's because you don't watch "Nip/Tuck" - and I can't blame you there. Robert Patrick, of course, wants to know if you've seen this boy.

Kim actually sketched out some viral marketing for this movie the other day on a napkin. I then ruined it by adding my own design in the upper right corner. Anyway, feel free to use it to promote "The Marine" on YOUR website:

(image removed)

The only way to follow THIS up is...no, not MATT STRIKER, but that's what YOU get. The classroom set is in the ring, so sit tight and get ready for some transcriptin'. ("My lethal weapon's my MIND." - Ice T) "Why don't you realise that I am here in ECW to HELP you? I am a bonafide schoolteacher, I am Matt Striker! You should be looking up to someone such as myself! But you - you don't cheer for me, do you? No. You ignorantly cheer for reprobates and pariahs - people like, for example I don't know - you cheer for the Sandman. You cheer for a man who irresponsibly consumes excessive amounts of alcohol....a man whose brains are clogged with barley and hops and resin - The Sandman is always so ossified from his giggle water (yes, I said ossified (m-w.com), if you don't know what it means, look it up) This man wields a Singapore cane! Well...Matt Striker's only weapon...is right here (points to noodle). You see, I am an intellectual GIANT drowning in a cesspool of derelicts. You enjoy that? Well, enjoy it while it lasts, because like it or not, I am in ECW to educate all of you, because I am your teacher, I AM Matt Striker--" cue the crappy music and there's SANDMAN. Down the stairs, into the ring, have a Bud, bash your forehead in...but as he heads for Striker, Striker shoves the chalkboard...well, not INTO him, but NEAR enough to daze and distract him, I guess. Next thing you know, Striker has Sandy's head and using it to test the structural integrity of his desk. The desk holds up. Right hand. STAPLER TO THE HEAD! I guess - there was some noise, but I kinda doubt the staples. Still...Sandy's head - well, it's probably bleeding from the aluminum can, but for the purposes of this story, we'll say that Striker opened 'im up something fierce with that stapler.

The new breed is unleashed! Check 'em at Spartanburg on Saturday, Greenwood on Sunday, Toms River on the next Saturday, and Schenectady the day after that. NOTHING can prepare you for ECW LIVE! So don't even try, champ!

AD BREAK: SciFi's "King of the ***LOST*** World GET IT GET IT" (again)
ESPN's highly repetitive fantasy football service online
Burger King (again)
"Crank" (again)
C'mon give me ONE ad I haven't already seen tonight
"Saints Row" (again) ARRRGH
ESPN's AHHHHHHHHHHH
SciFi image spot
(local) Midway Chevrolet in St. Paul - God bless you, local spot
(local) CD Warehouse of Minneapolis

"My name is BALLS MAHONEY, and the reason they call me Balls--" "Hi Balls!" "Hi KELLY, what's up?" "Um, not much. Have you seen my boyfriend, um, Mike Knox around anywhere?" "No I haven't, why?" "Well, because...as you know...I am...an exhibitionist." And she flashes him - with her back to the camera, of course. Balls is left to laugh, say "Yes" and "wow." The TRULY sad thing is it probably took a committee of six just to SCRIPT this.

Your hosts are JOEY STYLES & TAZZZZZZZZ. Talk quickly turns from Balls to Kurt Angle.
1.9

Say, Let's Take a Special Video Look at Kurt Angle! As you may have heard, everyone is shocked and surprised that Kurt is gone - no mention is made of the fact that he was one of Paul Heyman's two draft picks. Let's also take a look at the ECW web page. Styles says "unconditional release" which means you can look for him to debut in YOUR backyard federation tomorrow, if not sooner.

And now, a man and his strobe effect. "I'm SABU...and tonight, I'm gonna massacre Paul Heyman." Well. I guess that says it all, don't it?

"Ladies and gentlemen, THIS is your main event of the evening and it will be competed under Extreeeeeme Rules!"

ST. PAUL HEYMAN (with his own version of the S1W - and a NEXT graphic) v. AD BREAK - ad break wins again

WWE Unforgiven spot features Edge vs. Cena - no, REALLY, it actually features people who AREN'T the McMahons or DX! I can't believe it either!

AD BREAK: "Girls Gone Wild" (again)
Geico (Don LaFontaine)
Dish Network (Tiki again)
SciFi image spot
(local) HOM Furniture's World Rugs
(local) Menards - save big money with my nards!
SciFi's "Eureka" (again)
SciFi Original Movie "Sasquatch Mountain"

ECW EXTREME RULES: PAUL HEYMAN v. SABU - Roberts is shooed away before he can make an announcement of Heyman's hometown and weight, har har. The Men in Black (who I notice now have black masks on underneath their helmets - this should be another sign) make a wall in front of Heyman...but Sabu has a chair. I predict there won't be much luck for Extreme Official Mickey Jenson to get everybody apart once it starts - and there it is, as Sabu flings the chair forward - the other man tackles Sabu, both helmets have already flown off as a doubleteam beatdown ensues. Nighsticks aplenty! Sabu held by one, manages to dropkick the other, dropkick the one holding him, chair to the knee of one, chair to the head of the other, and now turning to Heyman, who does a lot of screaming. Sabu sets up the chair, points to the ceiling, "savours the moment" (aka stalls) and then uses the chair to...leap over a cowering Heyman onto the top rope and off onto...WELL IT'S THE BIG SHOW out on the floor. He caught him, but Sabu turned it into a DDT on the floor! Heyman is left alone in the ring...but Sabu is quickly swarmed by the security folk on the floor. And now Show's back up. Sabu rolled in the ring. Men in black holding Sabu...Show with the chair - knees by the security men and now Show throws the chair at Sabu (he's been studying)! Got him by the hair - well it's a big right hand. Sabu is "busted open." Heyman asks Show to hold him up - Heyman with a slap, slap, slap, Punk-like slaps with opposite hands. Heyman reminds us that he's Paul Heyman a few times, yells a few other choice words, then tells his security men to work on him. Choke with the nightstick. I guess Heyman "made" Sabu is what we're supposed to get from this. Well, it's a big headbutt. Show directs the men in black to set up a table (presumably so he can fall through it later). Are they really gonna do this for another ten minutes? Well it's a big knife-edge chop. Table is in place on the floor. Show holds Sabu for a straight right from Heyman. Heyman with one more, slower, right, to make sure he gets some blood on his hand. Heyman lets us all know he has Sabu's blood on his hand. Styles remarks that Heyman actually taped his hands for this match - Tazz quips that he probably keeps his money in there. Well it's a big right and down goes Sabu. The "Sabu" chant ain't helping. Well it's a big stomp. Again. Again. Boy, this is some compelling television. Well it's a big headbutt. Well it's a big scoop - and backbreaker across the knee. Heyman getting in his face again. "You wanna play with me, right? I made you! Why do you wanna come against me? Why would - SHOW! SHOW! SHOW!" Sabu was close enough to grab him, so Show pulls him away. Sabu right, right, breaks the grip, right, right, off the ropes...but into a big clothesline from Show. Heyman makes the Dreamer crucifix pose while on his knees. "I am your messiah, Sabu!" As we take an ECW Replay of the clothesline (so as to fool you that something's actually happening on your screen), in real time, Sabu has managed to kick Show's head. Right, right, right, but well it's a big headbutt and that's the end of that. "Big Show sucks" chant. Show decides to show everyone just how much he sucks - has Sabu's hair again - choke - and press overhead...but Show drops him gently behind his back as he seems distracted by something - wow, it's someone else maybe! Yes - it's POINTS TO SELF out to meet the men in black on the floor. One sent into the STEEL steps, one knocked back, van Dam in and meeting Show...right, right, right, right, Well it's a big headbutt puts Van Dam down. Heyman tosses Show a chair - well this can't end well...swing and a miss, and Show holds it just close enough to his head for Van Dam to try a Van Daminator - and again they have an unfortunate angle which makes it look closer to a whiff than to a connect. Show dutifully flumps into the corner, nonetheless. Van Dam has the chair - here he comes - ugh, again, an unfortunate choice of camera reveals a giant forearm coming up and blocking anything that MIGHT have looked good coming from Van Dam's dropkick to the chair. Geez, I'm so HARSH - why can't I enjoy this for what it is? Also, are Van Dam and Sabu friends again? For an encore, the director AAA's Van Dam's pescado onto the men in black on the floor! Back in the ring, Heyman is trying to revive Show, but that APPEARS to be a nonstarter - all that selling makes him TIRED, y'see! Sabu is finally back up - and he's got him two handfuls of Heyman. Thrown to the mat, right to the back, right, right, right, right - has the chair - Arabian facebuster (aka "Arabian back-of-the-headbuster"). Stomp, stomp, stomp, stomp, stomp, stomp, rolling Heyman ever closer to Van Dam on the outside - Van Dam directs him to the chair while HE places Heyman on the previously placed table on the floor. Chair in place - points to the ceiling - but as he comes off the chair and before he gets to the top rope - Show is back up and SPEARS him in midair to the mat! And now, because this wasn't enough of a clusterfuck, HARDCORE HOLLY is out to beat on Rob Van Dam. The men in black are back up as well, and taking Heyman off the table - mostly to clear it for Holly to Alabama Slam Van Dam through the table. Quick, back to the ring - Show has Sabu in the cobra cluthch - into the backbreaker across the knee - Show Stopper legdrop - chair thrown out of the ring - Heyman rolled in - draping
2.0

him over Sabu - Henson with the count - 1, 2, 3. Heyman wins. Heyman wins. Heyman wins. (8:36) "Theme From ECW" plays while the commentators take turns badmouthing Heyman - while Holly goes out for ANOTHER table. Show brings Heyman to his feet and raises his arm. Holly sets up the table - Show prevents Sabu from leaving the ring - a few punch attempts by Sabu - no - ahhhhhhhTHECHOKESLAAAAAM through the table. Play Show's music! One more arm raise for Heyman. Now Show stands over Sabu, does the crotch chop, wiggles, sticks his tongue out and....well, at least SOMEBODY had fun with this. It war'n't me, though. Heyman, meanwhile, has again assumed the Dreamer position. Oh, NOW he's getting his forehead very close to Sabu's, so as to make sure he gets some blood on it. This seems unhealthy! Heyman begins his own version of administering the Last Rites, as we examine the WWE copyright notice. Out at 10:03:15.

Are YOU better off than you were 12 weeks ago? Is SciFi? Is *WWE*?

These and other questions will all be answered....somewhere else, at some other time. BYE

(edited by CRZ on 30.8.06 1748)
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#2 Posted on 30.8.06 0810.38
Reposted on: 30.8.13 0814.18
A question about Punk's Vise. Last night, he reared back on it to the point that his head was laying back in the center of Stevie's chest. All the opponents have so far tapped on Punk's shoulder (and deprived us of hearing the tap on the mat). But my question is this: Why is no one raking his eyes to break the hold? His head is clearly within arm's reach. Also, CRZ mentioned Punk and Moore in the same segment. Both sport black nail polish. I smell cahoots.

I couldn't be the only one expecting Knox to club Ballz while he was staring at Kelly. Also, Sandman's seeming new feud with Striker suggests he and Dreamer ended the feud with Knox and Test last week. So why did Dreamer not run to RVD and Sabu's aid? He's the one Heyman betrayed to begin with.

No Thorn this week, sadly,(he wears black nail polish too, doesn't he?) but I think I appreciate Holly more. He took the time to use legdrops instead of Austin stomps. It's the little things, really.
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#3 Posted on 30.8.06 0940.07
Reposted on: 30.8.13 0941.16
It's a rare occasion I hear a WWE crowd as silent as they were during the Punk-Richards match. I swear I could make out someone coughing.
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#4 Posted on 30.8.06 1104.13
Reposted on: 30.8.13 1104.32
Anyway, this is the end of MY self-enforced commitment - we'll see if I'm still interested enough to continue next week. (Cash and/or sucking up would certainly tip the scales, if you catch my drify.)

Let the sucking up commence!

You are by far the best recapper ever. EVER!

Ok, honestly, I hope you do keep recapping ECW because I know I will always get a quality read and I won't have to wait until Friday for it to be posted. But I can understand if you don't want to. Last night's show sounded like it was hard to watch. If you lose interest, at least I can keep this little gem:

Alabama Slam Van Dam

Brian P. Dermody
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#5 Posted on 30.8.06 1129.08
Reposted on: 30.8.13 1129.11
    Originally posted by CRZ
    This week's Canadian fantasy comes to you courtesy the exercycle: "I think it's safe to say that I'm in the peak of my physical condition - and it's time to make my mark in wrestling history...as the most extreme athlete to EVER step foot in an ECW ring. I'm RENE DUPREE. Bon soir." But seriously...are these promos any worse than CM Punk's were?


I would argue yes. And not because I'm an unapologetic Punk mark (though I am). Punk's promos at least attempted to get over what facets of the character made him a fit for ECW (Discipline, hunger for competition, and KEWL tattoos).

Dupree is just saying that he's extreme and not saying why, or when we'll find out. We're meant to take him at his word without any cause to believe him.

ETA: It'd be keen if you continued the recaps, Zed. If you decided not to though, no jury in the world would convict you. And thanks for the work you put in on the ones you've already done.

(edited by Brian P. Dermody on 30.8.06 1231)
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#6 Posted on 30.8.06 1141.47
Reposted on: 30.8.13 1143.01
    Originally posted by CRZ
    Anyway, this is the end of MY self-enforced commitment - we'll see if I'm still interested enough to continue next week. (Cash and/or sucking up would certainly tip the scales, if you catch my drify.



What!? Linkifying you at the DVDVR isn't payment enough??
Jeremy Billones
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#7 Posted on 30.8.06 1204.16
Reposted on: 30.8.13 1204.20

    Anyway, this is the end of MY self-enforced commitment - we'll see if I'm still interested enough to continue next week. (Cash and/or sucking up would certainly tip the scales, if you catch my drify.)


Hey now! If it's a 13 week run, not recapping the 13th show means you didn't do the entire run, right?

On the other hand, it's freakin' HHH, I can't blame you.
Tenken347
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#8 Posted on 30.8.06 1419.15
Reposted on: 30.8.13 1419.52
    Originally posted by Brian P. Dermody
      Originally posted by CRZ
      This week's Canadian fantasy comes to you courtesy the exercycle: "I think it's safe to say that I'm in the peak of my physical condition - and it's time to make my mark in wrestling history...as the most extreme athlete to EVER step foot in an ECW ring. I'm RENE DUPREE. Bon soir." But seriously...are these promos any worse than CM Punk's were?


    I would argue yes. And not because I'm an unapologetic Punk mark (though I am). Punk's promos at least attempted to get over what facets of the character made him a fit for ECW (Discipline, hunger for competition, and KEWL tattoos).

    Dupree is just saying that he's extreme and not saying why, or when we'll find out. We're meant to take him at his word without any cause to believe him.


Actually, the combination of Renee trying to convince you he's extreme while he does stuff like pose for model shoots is done to show you just how NOT extreme he is, and make you wonder why on earth he's going to be competing in ECW. I don't know, they work better for me than Punk's bits, and certainly better than Moore's unending stream of them (and certainly better than the ones where he tries to talk).

And I would really like CRZ to keep doing recaps (although no one should ever have to recap a dX bit) just because I think every recap he's done has been at least a little bit better than the one before it. I'd like to see where (if?) he tops out.
too-old-now
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#9 Posted on 30.8.06 1507.47
Reposted on: 30.8.13 1509.23
Whether or not the sucking up will be sufficient, let me say "Thank You" for recapping the past dozen weeks. Even when I haven't caught the whole show, your recaps make me feel like I was there, snickering along with you.

But, I am glad I get my local ad breaks for Bob's discount furniture instead of your locals. At least we both get the ads for "Girls Gone Wild: Ultimate Rush" & "Girls Gone Wild: First Timers" - I wanted to be sure to mention both "Girls Gone Wild: Ultimate Rush" & "Girls Gone Wild: First Timers" to increase any stray traffic to your site.

    Originally posted by CRZ

    Has anyone heard definitively that they've actually renewed this show? I keep looking and looking and I mean, everybody SAYS it's a done deal, but...shouldn't we have seen the official announcement by now?


I haven't seen anything official anywhere, not even on WWE.com or ECW.com I thought I read something after the week 2 ratings were posted that it'd surely be picked up, but the closest we'll get is Big Show's announcing his handicap challenge against Dx next week.

For me, the best part of the new ECW has been trying to predict the direction CRZ would take this. Some pieces were easy, like "play his music 'cuz he LOST! Others, let's just say I was hoping for "Well, its a big teaser for next week." Instead, we get "Sounds like a perfect week to stop watching."

Nah. I'm twisted enough to stick through this.

Bring back the Zombie!


redsoxnation
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#10 Posted on 30.8.06 1731.01
Reposted on: 30.8.13 1731.53
Tommy Dreamer would have been perfectly logical to interfere, and then have Test stop his interference, as Heyman's interference helped Test beat Dreamer a few weeks ago. Of course, that would be continuity, and that is verboten.
I miss C.W. Anderson.
Sad they had to let Angle go after spending all that money on an ECW mouthpiece. Probably would have bankrupted the old company.
Heyman in the ring 15 years ago with Missy Hyatt was bad enough. Him rarely involving himself on screen was one of the best parts of vintage ECW. Now, it is just Heyman being Vince Lite.

StaggerLee
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#11 Posted on 30.8.06 2134.06
Reposted on: 30.8.13 2134.13
Somebody please tell me that was the absolute worst CM Punk match ever.

First time I have ever seen him, and if that's his A Game, I fail to see what all the hype is about.

PLEASE tell me he's much, much better than that effort against Steven Richards.
Brian P. Dermody
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#12 Posted on 30.8.06 2238.03
Reposted on: 30.8.13 2240.06
Upthread I confessed to being an unapologetic Punk mark. All these years, Stagger, you don't trust me?

Find "Joe v Punk II" from a ROHbot friend of yours or online somewhere and enjoy.
jerniebert
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#13 Posted on 30.8.06 2314.28
Reposted on: 30.8.13 2315.21
Meltzer said they renewed the show, but no details were given other then it will stay at 10 on Tuesdays and there will be a replay with the time still undecided.

You got to keep reviewing ECW. You are the only ECW recapper that doesn't bust a nut all over your keyboard when CM Punk comes on.
CRZ
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#14 Posted on 30.8.06 2331.07
Reposted on: 30.8.13 2331.22
    Originally posted by jerniebert
    Meltzer said they renewed the show, but no details were given other then it will stay at 10 on Tuesdays and there will be a replay with the time still undecided.
Ah so. FINALLY we can all rest easy. http://www.wrestlingobserver.com/wo/news/headlines/default.asp?aID=17247

Thanks as always for the kind words, everybody!
BigDaddyLoco
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#15 Posted on 1.9.06 1834.32
Reposted on: 1.9.13 1835.02
I'd love to see you stick with this until the end of 2007.
ScreamingHeadGuy
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#16 Posted on 7.9.06 1215.07
Reposted on: 7.9.13 1216.45
Thanks for doing the recaps, CRZ. It was good to read you again.
Sean Carless
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#17 Posted on 8.9.06 0225.05
Reposted on: 8.9.13 0226.48
(image removed)


God bless you for that Jeff Fahey reference on the napkin. That floored me. Hilarious. And if Fahey couldn't make it, I'm sure Andrew Stevens (along with Shannon Tweed, whom he is contractually obligated to seduce whilst undertaking his noble duties as a night watchman) would be willing to step right in. Night Eyes 4 would just have to wait.

(edited by CRZ on 29.11.06 1327)
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#18 Posted on 8.9.06 0945.29
Reposted on: 8.9.13 0945.53
    Originally posted by Sean Carless
    God bless you for that Jeff Fahey reference on the napkin. That floored me. Hilarious.
I cannot take credit for Kim's work. Well, this time, anyway.
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