1. While Kurt and the sewing lady are mesmerized by the WWE logo on the table, the UPN logo sneaks by undetected.
2.Rock: Hey, I heard you got fired. Don't worry, I got you a great opening as an extra for "Helldorado"! Austin: What?
3.Booker T: Damn! I wonder if I can stick all five of my fingers up dat huge nostril o' his!
4. DUHHHHH... BRAIN GO IN HERE!
5.Flair: Don't feel so bad about not being a six-time champion, Book. You'd probably have to surgically attach an extra finger to your right hand to do a Spinarooni. I'm a 16-time World Champion. This is why I don't do Spinaroonies...
6. Thus, Austin and Hunter began a tug of war to see who would be the first to hold down the new talent...
7. Behold! Undertaker prepares to chokeslam Fred Durst for butchering his entrance theme...
(edited by The Great Thomas on 3.4.03 2108) Now Playing: Megaman Battle Network
Seriously, six weeks? Are you sure you're a doctor?
2) So here's my agent's card, man...I think we can squeeze you in as an extra on that new Seagall movie. 3) So you'll buy some shit from my store once they release me, right? 4) With Edge out a year and woozie from painkillers, he foolishly agrees to Vince's suggestion that the following year's downside guarantee be paid entirely in hats. 5) So I pass the pilot the doobie, and the next thing I know the plane's going down...David Crockett starts pissing himself... 6) The young rookie's abmition to choke out everyone who ever refused to job to him is halted when he realizes he only has two hands. 7)
Sure you did, Fred. And I banged Miss Elizabeth.
"Whatever I just posted above is what your mother said in bed last night."
I only have one caption and its for the Ric Flair 3 fingers pic.
Record Exec. "So Busta, we make Pass the Couvasier part 3!!!" Booker T "If you call me Busta again I'm gonna break your neck Sucka!"
RIP Curt Hennig: Yeah, they call me a redneck, but you know---that's a beautiful thing!
You don't get it boy, this isn't a mudhole... it's an operating table. And I'm the surgeon. Something tells me to stop with the leg. I don't listen to it. But where in the world is there in the world A man so extroardinaire?
Ummm... miss? Sorry about the mix up earlier. I'm really not Stone Cold Steve Austin. 2)
Rock - Look man, you gotta be picky when you're looking for a wife. Check mine out, she's a vice president of Merrill Lynch. Austin - What? 3)
Look man, I know I'm not going over at Mania. Must you keep whispering that under your breath during my promo? 4)
Ummm.. HHH has me at finger-point and he wants me to read this: "You stupid Internet marks are ruining the business. You motherfuckers know about everything ahead of time now! We here at the WWE don't know how to deal with you, so we're gonna villify you and treat you like a radical marginal fringe! Even though you're our fanbase, you're not our LOYAL fans, the fans who buy t-shirts and shut the fuck up and don't ask questions. What, most of our fanbase is online? No, that can't be right, it's COMPUTERS, only fat, socially awkward people use those! Right? Like in the 70s? Fat nerds, right? No girlfriends! No? The average person uses a computer? Bah!! You're fucking things up! We don't know how to deal with you! We knew how to deal with you as a collective, unwashed mass, dumb marks that would pay good money to watch squash matches! Don't read the sheets, they know nothing! None of our disenfranchised midcarders call them and dish dirt about what's going on, they're MAKING SHIT UP! JR doesn't get to write a column any more because he was giving away too much. Too many people were learning about the inner workings of Oklahoma football and barbecue sauce. But the rest of that stuff is bullshit! Look, just trust us." 5)
I'm old and frightened. 6)
Yeah, this is probably gonna happen 7)
Don't go anywhere, Fred. This shouldn't take too long.
-- Asteroid Boy
Wiener of the day: 23.7.02
"My brother saw the Undertaker walking through an airport." "Was he no-selling?"
1: Kurt to woman: "You dad drinks, because you cry". 2: "Steve, it hurts. HURTS!" 3: Book to HHH: "I better be getting a rematch after Wrestlemania" 4: "And I got THIS scar from..... 5: "Sixteen time sixteen time sixteen time sixteen time sixte...."
6: Hurricane slowly realizes that no, he can not in fact chokeslam Austin and HHH at the same time
7: Taker: "I LOVE YOU MAN!". Durst: "Let go of me!"
(edited by El Nastio on 4.4.03 1124)
(edited by El Nastio on 4.4.03 1126) Reviewer of games, token redneck, and one of the few remaining Expos fans.
Kurt: Jeez Booker, I told you those roids wouldn't be good for your health.... 2)
Rock: Look I know you're important to the business and all Steve, but everyone left the autograph session six hours ago Austin: What? 3)
Booker: Look down there *flicks Hunter's nose* gotcha! 4)
Edge: I'm just going to keep poking myself in the temple until I forget the fact I'll be in midcard hell for the rest of my life 5)
Flair: Let this be a lesson to ya Book, never try to push the limits on how far you can get a finger up your nose. The consequences are deadly, man. Book: Dude, who the hell let Leslie Nielson in here? 6)
Hurricane: Now let's see who they REALLY are! ......ah crap, no masks. Okay, you can both kill me now 7)
Taker: *pat pat* Okay you're clean, go 'head, go 'head
(edited by Evil Antler God on 4.4.03 0945) Anybody can kick people's asses. But it takes a true monster to kick people's asses AND breastfeed at the same time - Excalibur05
1. As much as Kurt sympathizes with Booker T's mom, he realized that her sewing all the wrestlers trunks was the only way that Booker got ANY pinfall victory over HHH.
2. Rock: "Steve, I'm going over at Wrestlemania." Austin: "What?" Rock: "It says so here on the sheet I'm holding." Austin: "What?" Rock: "Steve, please stop that." Austin: "What?" Rock: "It's not going to work..." Austin: "What?" Rock: "I'm still pinning you." (Long pause) Austin: "What the hell happened to your hair?" Rock: (After longer pause) "I'm leaving now."
3. You know, I wonder what might be the only scenario that the writers would have let Booker get the title (rubs chins, fades into dream sequence)
Booker: Trips! Over there Chyna and Steph getting it on lesbo style! HHH: Huh? (Looks over to where Booker's pointing) Booker grabs belt from Patrick and runs out of ring, laughing all the way.
4. Christian attepmted a Wet Willie, but unfortunately missed.
5. Flair: Busta Rhymes! Huge fan, my man! Booker: .... Ric, it's me, Booker. Flair: Pass the Couvarcier! Love that song! "Don't this shit make a nigga wanna jump, jump!! Booker: .... You've been hanging around RVD again, right? Flair: Hey, you were the bomb in Haloween: Resurection! Booker: .... Flair, please go bug HHH.
6. And then, Shane Helms woke up.
7. Undertaker: "Dude, fly's open."
By the way, Storm's gimmick includes 1.) telling the audience to shut up, and 2.) occasionally making everyone stand for the Canadian national anthem. You know they don't know what to do with a wrestler when he's making fans stand for a national anthem. It's like waving a white flag and saying, "This guy has no personality -- we give up."
1. Whoa, whoa, whoa! You're using THAT to repair my freaking neck?!? 2. Rock: A ROCK concert - get it? Because my name is The Rock, and.... Austin: I left staying at home for THIS? 3. Hold it, dawg! HE'S the only one allowed to hold me back! 4. I'M dumb? Which one of us gets to take a paid year's vacation? 5. Flair: That looks pretty serious, Book. You better have a *real* doctor look at that. Booker: You mean the woman outside working on Kurt's neck isn't a real doctor? 6. .... Able to leap glass ceilings in a single bound.... 7. You had me at hello.
"Triple H, The Rock says they didn't keep you at the bottom of the barrel just because you wanted to say goodbye to your roody poo friends in Madison Square Garden. No! The Rock says, they kept you at the bottom of the barrel because you absolutely suck."
So, this morning at 10:00 I logged onto Ticketmaster and bought two tickets to Survivor Series at the Joe Louis Arena, what will be my first live wrestling show. Section 122, row 7. I have no idea how good these seats are.